To Everything There is a Season - Growing Pains
by mpluto
Summary: This is fourth of the To Everything series, the first, Reacquaintance, the second Falling, and the third Togetherness. Shiloh and Adam come home from their honeymoon and embark on a new life together discovering that fitting all their desires in can make for trouble as her past creeps in and as they balance the opportunities that come their way.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

The last stage of the return home from their honeymoon was just as unpleasant for Shiloh as the ride that had begun their honeymoon. The only redeeming part of it was that it wasn't bone-chilling cold. Spring thunderstorms had turned Johnson's Cut-off into mud most of the way with large puddles in places, two that forced the passengers to leave the coach so the horses could pull the coach through. Adam carried Shiloh so her dress wouldn't be ruined, but the two other ladies in the coach weren't as fortunate.

Sitting next to the window, Shiloh could see that spring was trying to burst through what little snow remained on the ground with the occasional snow plants pushing their bright red cone through matted pine needles and debris. The deciduous trees had just begun to open their fresh green leaves, and the grayness was giving way to light and blue sky.

When they arrived in Virginia City, Adam heard the breath she let out and watched as her body relaxed from the stiffness she had kept all through the ride. He stepped out of the coach and reached back for her hand, helping her down onto the street.

"Adam, good to have you back, Son," said Ben cheerfully just as Adam turned toward the boardwalk.

Shaking his father's hand, he said, "Thanks, Pa. It's good to be back," with a big smile.

Leaning down to hug Shiloh, Ben asked, "How was the honeymoon?"

Her answer was a bit subdued. "Parts were very good. Other parts…not so much."

Straightening, Ben looked at both of them. "We've been reading about some of it in the newspaper."

"We'll tell you all about it at home, Pa. But right now, we have an errand to run. Do you mind waiting for us? I don't think we'll be long."

Ben was about to speak, but was interrupted by Hoss and Joe coming down the boardwalk from the saloon. "It's about you time you two got home. How was San Francisco?" asked Joe.

Adam and Shiloh looked at each other. "Santa Cruz was better," said Shiloh, smiling.

"We'll be back in a few minutes," said Adam, taking Shiloh's elbow and guiding her down the boardwalk.

"What was that about?" asked Joe, watching them go, then turning back to his father.

"I have no idea, but I'm sure we're going to find out later. I didn't get the chance to invite them to dinner tonight. Hop Sing wanted to introduce them to Ming Lin."

Shiloh looked back over her shoulder to make sure she was out of earshot. "Adam, do we have to do this now? Paul's probably already finished with his day."

"Yes, we have to do this now because if we don't, I'll have to hog-tie you to get you back here."

They stopped in front of Dr. Martin's office and knocked on the door. Paul's nurse answered. "Hello, Helen," greeted Adam. "Is Paul in?"

"We were just about to close the office. He's in the examining room straightening up."

"Helen, who is it?" came a voice from behind her. "Adam, Shiloh, when did you get back?"

"Just now," said Adam, smiling. His expression turned serious. "Paul, do you have a few minutes?"

"Is this for you or Shiloh?"

"Shiloh has some questions."

"I think I can see one more patient today. Come in."

Adam waited in the front room while Shiloh sat in Dr. Martin's office. He clasped his hands in his lap and waited. "You're going to have to tell me what the problem is."

"Before I ask anything I want to know what your views are about women…and their…wombs."

Paul raised his hand to hide a smile. "I like to think I'm more enlightened than most. I've seen too much illness to believe that the womb is the cause of all female problems."

"Good, because the last doctor I saw said my problems were caused by my intelligence."

"Can I assume we're talking about having a baby?" She nodded. "Shiloh, female reproductive problems have nothing to do with your education. But they could have to do with your mental state. Now, why don't you tell me what's wrong."

Taking a deep breath, she told Paul about her sometimes late or missing monthlies as she fidgeted, not once looking up at him. "And now, it seems that I'm missing another one, only…now, there could be another reason it's missing."

"Well, considering you've only been married a month, it would be too early to tell if you've conceived. When did you start missing?"

Shiloh thought back. "Not until I was in Boston…after I had started performing on stage. And about the time I started seeing Will Stewart."

Dr. Martin sat calmly in his chair. "Based on what I've been reading in the newspaper, that must have been a difficult time for you."

"At the time, I didn't think so, but now that you mention it, I guess that entire time I had some doubts…and fears."

"And when you came home, you had to deal with your father's death and some difficult decisions. Have there been any recent times when you were on time?"

"Yes. Not long after Adam proposed. In fact, I finished one only a few days before the wedding."

"And now, you've missed the next one, and what's been happening in San Francisco? Don't answer that. From the newspaper articles, I have an idea. Shiloh, I think your level of anxiety is causing you to miss or be late. And in that case, I would say that cutting back the things that worry you the most might just solve the problem, unless of course, you have conceived, and if that's true, we won't know for a little while."

"So you think the same way as the other doctor," she snapped, crossing her arms.

"No, I don't think there's anything physically wrong with you, and certainly nothing that a little break won't cure. You're too young for me to think there's a physical problem."

"Dr. Martin, there are some things I need to do before…." How will I know considering I don't always have a monthly?"

"Well, I would keep up with them as if you had them on schedule. Even if you don't have one, I think we can assume everything else is working normally. And when you do have one, if it's late, adjust accordingly. But you know that counting isn't a guarantee that you won't conceive. There's only one way to know that for sure."

Shiloh's face flushed. She stood and made her way to the door. "Thank you for your time, Doctor."

"Glad I could help." He said, stepping out into the front room with her. "Adam, would you mind coming back. Shiloh, we'll only be a moment." She bit her lip and sat slowly in a chair, watching the two men disappear into the office.

"Adam, I know you know about condoms. You've asked me about them before."

Stumbling over words, Adam finally said, "Well Paul, those were to prevent catching a disease."

"They can also be helpful in preventing conception."

Adam looked down at his hat in his hands. "I would never consider using one of those with a respectable woman…certainly not my wife."

"I understand you feeling that way, Adam, but they're more reliable than counting," said Paul as he walked to the door and pulled it open. "Give your father my regards."

Smiling, Adam said, "I'll do that," then left the office with Shiloh, laying her hand over his arm and walking back down the street toward the waiting buckboard.

Shiloh looked ahead, but nervously cut her eyes upward toward Adam. "What did he say?"

"He…um…well…he talked about…the same thing you talked about. What did he say to you?"

"He said he doesn't think there's anything wrong with me, and that we won't know if I'm having a baby for awhile or until my next monthly. He said we could either…" she bit her lip, "…abstain…" Adam stopped walking and looked down at her with his mouth twisted. "…or I can count."

He looked over her head back down the sidewalk and took a deep breath. "Start counting."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

"Hop Sing!" yelled Ben.

Hop Sing hurried out of the kitchen. "Yes, Mista Carlight."

"Hop Sing, Adam and Shiloh will be joining us for dinner. You had someone you wanted them to meet?"

"Hop Sing be right back," he said, nodding and hurrying back into the kitchen. Adam took Shiloh's cape and hung it on the rack next to the door along with his hat. He laid his gun on the cabinet. Before they could sit down, Hop Sing hurried back into the entry way, pulling another Chinese man behind him. "Mista Adam, Missy Shiloh, this Ming Lin, number three cousin."

Ming Lin bowed, saying very slowly, "It is very nice to make your acquaintance." Hop Sing nodded, smiling expectantly.

Both Shiloh and Adam bowed. "Ming Lin," said Adam, "It's nice to meet you."

Shiloh let Adam do the talking while she studied Ming Lin. He was younger than Hop Sing, and by the way he was speaking, he had recently gotten some instruction in the English language. He made a great effort to say all of his words and pronounce them correctly to the point that his struggle with certain words was obvious.

"Do you have any experience cooking and cleaning?" asked Adam.

"I have been learning to cook American at the Washoe Club. Hop Sing has graciously allowed me to help here for several weeks. I am familiar with his duties."

"He cook good," said Hop Sing. "Hop Sing teach cousin to cook food you like, Mista Adam. I teach him more," he said, smiling and nodding.

Laughing, Adam turned to Shiloh. "Sweetheart?"

"How can I say 'no' with Hop Sing's recommendation? When can you start, Ming Lin?"

"Ming Lin bring bags. He start now," said Hop Sing, grinning. "We get dinner ready." Pulling Ming Lin's sleeve, Hop Sing bowed and led Ming Lin back into the kitchen.

Shiloh turned to Adam. "You were right. I wouldn't be surprised if Ming Lin and Hop Sing have already stocked the house."

"That they did," said Ben, laughing. "They've already turned over the ground for a garden behind the kitchen, and they were both eyeing that empty field back there."

"I guess he'll stay in the downstairs bedroom for now. There's no other place to put him except in the bunkhouse," said Shiloh.

Adam nodded. "I'll add a room off the back of the kitchen to the house plans."

As they all walked into the sitting area, Ben got comfortable in the leather chair near the fireplace, and Adam and Shiloh sat on the settee while Hoss added more wood to the fire.

"You two have a lot to tell," said Ben, giving them his full attention.

The corner of Adam's mouth turned up as he looked down at Shiloh's hand, and taking it in his," he said, "I don't know where to begin."

Ben nodded. "How about at the beginning?"

"Well, the first day in San Francisco everything was great. We saw Annie off safely, then went to our hotel and rested. I showed Shiloh the house plans, and that afternoon we decided to take a walk before dinner."

"And that's when all that business about Will started," interjected Shiloh. "I had gone down to the lobby to see the piano, and while I was waiting for Adam to come down from our room, Will appeared. It turns out he's the new city attorney for San Francisco, and he lives there now."

"Even so, we went for that walk, but then the man who's been following Shiloh appeared…"

"And Adam chased him…"

"He got away, but he was with us until we left for Santa Cruz."

Hop Sing came out of the kitchen and announced that dinner was ready, and when everyone was seated and grace had been said, Adam and Shiloh continued their story during the meal. Adam told them about dinner with the Slater's and why he had bargained for second position in the partnership. He skimmed over the theatre, opera, and Cliff House, and then picked up with Will's complaint and the newspaper article.

"Hoss wanted to leave for San Francisco immediately when he saw that article," said Ben.

"It was good you didn't," said Adam, looking at Hoss. "We didn't stay in San Francisco. We stayed a few days at Jim Fischer's ranch. He invited some of his friends to dinner to discuss Shiloh's horses, and he and Shiloh worked out her performance contracts. After that, we took a clipper ship down the coast to Santa Cruz."

"Now, that was the highlight of the honeymoon. Santa Cruz is such a beautiful little town," said Shiloh.

"We went to see the Meder's, Pa."

"Moses Meder? How's he doing?"

"He's built an impressive dairy. In fact, I brought back some good information. I was thinking about building our own dairy."

Ben suddenly coughed, quickly set his fork down and picked up his napkin. "A dairy? Here? Son, I'm not sure we want to be involved with a dairy. We don't know how to run one, and we sure don't know anything about making that much butter."

"And cheese," added Shiloh.

"Cheese?" said Hoss. "I don't like cheese."

Adam scratched his head and smiled. "Pa, we do know how to run a dairy. Shiloh and I spent several days at the Meders learning the whole process. But that's something we can discuss later. That's not even the best part."

Next, Adam and Shiloh told them about their time on the beach. "That was the best part of the whole trip," said Shiloh, looking over at Adam, and grinning from ear to ear.

"Then on the way home, we missed the stagecoach in Sacramento and had to stay an extra day. Charles Crocker found out and invited us to dinner."

For the second time that evening, Ben put his fork down. "Charles Crocker…of the Pacific Railroad?"

"Yeah, Pa. It turns out the land Shiloh purchased belonged to Charles Crocker. He used the sale to build up the initial capital he needed for the railroad. Now he wants to leverage the sales contract to lower his costs so he can get the loan guarantees he needs to start building."

Ben drew in a breath and blew out of his mouth. "Does this mean what I think it means?"

Adam's enthusiasm was evident when he threw his napkin on the table and turned to face his father. "He wants to use the five contracts to lower his costs by the fifty percent he's entitled to. And if we deliver those on time, he's prepared to use us exclusively for all the timber. That's means a five or six year deal, Pa, the biggest contract we've ever had."

Joe took his spoon and tapped it against his water glass, then picked up the glass. "Here's to Older Brother, whose timber contracts just seem to get bigger and bigger."

"Oh no, Joe. This wasn't my doing. This is all because of Shiloh's bid for the land."

"That's not quite true. I did buy the land, but it was the Cartwright name that got his attention in Sacramento," said Shiloh.

"Then here's to both of ya," said Hoss. "The best timber selling team this side of the Comstock."

Ben, Hoss and Joe raised their glasses, but Shiloh remained reserved, remembering Mr. Stanton's hesitation and the reason she won that land bid. Still, she maintained a convincing smile.

After dinner, Adam and Shiloh sat with Ben, sipping coffee and discussing the situation with Will, and how Slater, Cartwright and Slater intended to handle him as the city attorney.

"I had no idea you were planning to submit plans and drawings for the courthouse," said Ben.

Adam raised his hand off the arm of the settee and nodded. "I didn't think there was any point in saying anything. I thought it was a long shot. It turns out the only thing the city required after they chose my plans was that I be part of a local firm. Slater and Slater had been looking for a partner when they bid on the courthouse, and when they found out I wasn't part of a firm they offered the partnership to me. I couldn't turn it down, Pa."

"Oh, I'm not saying you should have. But we're going to have to make some adjustments here."

"You were going to have to do that anyway now that I'm helping at the Flying W."

"That's true, Son, but this is much bigger. It's both now, but I know how long you've wanted to pursue that direction."

"There's something else, Mr. Cartwright," said Shiloh.

"Now, Shiloh, I thought we got that Mr. Cartwright business settled."

She smiled. "Sorry. I forgot…Pa. I have the opportunity to expand my horse business because of Jim Fischer, but I'll need help if it's going to grow. I need to teach someone how to train the horses. I thought about Johnny or Billy, but I don't think either of them is up to it." She looked across the room in the other direction. "I'd like to teach Hoss. He and I can be partners."

Hoss looked up from the game of checkers he and Joe were playing. "Me?"

"Well, Hoss, you're already comfortable around horses, and you're good with them. You have the patience and the heart. All you need is the technique." She looked down at her hands. "This way, when Adam and I decide it's time to start a family, I'll have someone I can rely on to keep things going forward until I can get back into it full time."

Hoss looked over at his father with a hopeful smile that quickly changed into a look of concern. "I don't know how that's gonna work with Adam splittin' his time between the Ponderosa and the Flying W."

Adam moved to the edge of his seat. "If we do all of this, Pa, we'll have to talk about how to handle things…we might have to hire a foreman or we'll have to step into more of a supervisory role and hire more men to do the work we've always done. The way I figure it, we'd have to do this anyway if we want to continue to grow."

Ben raised his hand to his chin. "The question is, Son, at what point do we stop growing? And what's the danger in growing too quickly."

Adam pursed his lips, and breathed deeply. He had suspected his father would be hesitant to make any big changes. Now, he was fairly certain making the necessary changes would be an uphill battle.

"Well, it appears we do have a lot to discuss," said Ben. "Why don't we wait a few days…let you and Shiloh get settled back in, and then sit down and determine what we can and can't do. Shiloh, your horses are here at the Ponderosa." She shot straight up off the settee, and Adam wasn't far behind her. Ben raised both hands. "They're all fine. Your shed collapsed in a windstorm and all the hay got wet. Joe and Johnny brought them here for shelter. As a matter of fact, Johnny's been staying here to tend to them."

She let out the breath she had been holding. "Thank you, Mr….Pa. I appreciate you taking care of them."

Smiling, he said, "I do want to talk to you about Satan, but not tonight. I'm sure both of you are tired after the ride from Sacramento."

"We should be getting home," said Adam.

"Adam, Shiloh," started Hoss, standing. "Before you go, I need to tell you somethin'. Annie sent me a telegram when she got to New York."

Taking a step forward, Shiloh asked anxiously, "Is Annie all right?"

"Annie's fine. In fact, she sent you a letter. I left it on the desk in your study. But it seems that Mr. Booth fellow is runnin' a theatre up there, and when she got there, he met her. It's Mr. Booth's wife. Seems she'd been real sick, and well, she passed away."

Shiloh stopped breathing and froze. When Adam took hold of her, she was trembling. He watched her eyes searching, waiting for Hoss's words to sink in. "Oh no," she whispered as tears filled her eyes. "When?" she asked barely loud enough for Hoss to hear.

"She died back in February…before the weddin.'"

"He sent us both a telegram. Why didn't he tell us?" asked Adam.

Hoss stuffed his hands in his pockets. "He didn't want to spoil the weddin' for you. He figured there weren't nothin' you could do anyway."

Hanging her head, Shiloh let her tears flow. "She was a year younger than me. And Edwina…she's just a baby."

Adam pulled her to him, and she buried her face in his chest. "I'm so sorry, Sweetheart," he whispered. "Let's get you home."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Hoss had offered to drive the buckboard over to the Flying W and help with the trunks, but Adam insisted that wasn't necessary. Hoss relented. It was late, and he didn't relish the thought of driving back in the dark. Ming Lin sat on the back, and when they arrived at the ranch, he began to pull Adam and Shiloh's bags from the wagon.

"Ming Lin, don't worry about those," said Adam as Hank walked up from the bunkhouse. "I'll have the hands take care of the baggage. Hank, could you find someone to carry these trunks upstairs?" Adam asked, holding out his hand.

"Sure thing, Mr. Cartwright. And welcome home," he answered, smiling and shaking the hand Adam offered.

Shiloh had already gone into the house with Ming Lin to show him to his room, and when Adam went into the house, he found her in the study, opening the letter from Annie. He sat on the side of the desk, flipping through a stack of mail, waiting until Shiloh had finished reading Annie's letter. He found a letter for him from Edwin and opened it.

_Adam,_

_It is with a heavy heart that I deliver sad news of my wife, Mary's passing, though I know you may have already heard the news from Annie. I know you did not know Mary well, but Mary always held Isabella in high regard as they were very near the same age and occupation. Mary referred to her as a kindred spirit. _

_Please understand that I did not send news of Mary's death only because I was afraid Isabella would have postponed the wedding and attempted to come to Boston, a futile action as there was nothing she could have done._

_Edwina and I are moving to New York where I have taken employment as manager of the Winter Garden Theatre. Once I have permanent lodgings, I will notify you of the address._

_Your friend,_

_Edwin Booth_

Adam folded the letter and put it back in the envelope, then looked up at Shiloh, convinced she had read over the letter from Annie more than once and was now staring at the words. "What did Annie have to say?"

"She said that Mollie had sent word to Edwin that she was quite ill, but he didn't take her seriously at first and only made it to her side just before she died."

"Mollie?"

"Edwin and I called her Mollie." To everyone outside the family, she was Mary." Shiloh took a deep breath and wiped a tear from her cheek. "Annie arrived safely. She stayed in Boston with Edwin for a few days, and then caught the train to Philadelphia. She was allowed to move into hospital housing early, and has spent her time learning the city. After an interview and a test of her abilities, they will start her in second year classes." A slight smile appeared on her lips. "She thanked me for the music box."

"I didn't know you gave her a music box."

"I slipped it into her bag when we left for San Francisco." Standing, Shiloh walked to the side of the desk where Adam was sitting and lifted his hand in hers. "I'm tired. I'm going up to bed. Would you mind seeing that Ming Lin has everything he needs? He can start with breakfast tomorrow. You and I need to discuss a schedule of meals with him."

Adam stood, and she stepped into his waiting arms, sniffling. "I'll be up in a little while. I want to talk to Hank and see if there's anything specific I need to deal with tomorrow."

"Mr. Cartwright, that's the last of the bags," said a ranch hand on his way out." Adam nodded. "Would you ask Hank to come to the house?"

"Sure thing, Mr. Cartwright."

Shiloh stepped back. "I should stay and listen."

Still holding her in his arms, Adam said, "If there's anything out of the ordinary, I'll let you know. Go on up." He kissed her and walked her to the foot of the stairs, watching as she climbed until she stepped into the bedroom. Then he walked to the front door, answering a knock.

"Mr. Cartwright, you wanted to see me?" asked Hank.

"Come on in, Hank. Besides taking the horses to the Ponderosa has anything else happened out of the ordinary while we were gone?"

"There was one thing. We found a fella up near the rim rock. He'd been shot. When we looked around, we found some shovels and picks, but we didn't find any diggins. I've been sending two men up there a couple of times a week, but we haven't seen anyone else. Sheriff Coffee came out and looked around. He said if we found anyone else up there to let him know. Other than that, it's been quiet."

"Cattle?"

"I had planned to move 'em up to the high meadows this week if we don't get any more rain. We've got a lotta calving going on right now. I've doubled the men on the herd just in case some of those cows need some help. I think we'll be ready for the spring round-up by the end of the month. The rest of the men are repairing the fences and out buildings." Hank removed his hat and took a deep breath. The extra snow and wind did a good bit of damage, but all those repairs Mrs. Cartwright had done last year paid off. It's less than I thought it'd be."

"Sounds like you've got everything under control. We'll start meeting in the morning again to go over the day's work. And we have a cook now; one of Hop Sing's cousins. His name is Ming Lin. If he's anything like Hop Sing, you might want to travel lightly in the kitchen."

"If he's anything like Hop Sing, Mr. Cartwright, I'll avoid the kitchen altogether," said Hank, heading for the door. He stopped midway through and turned. "Is there anything else you need tonight, Mr. Cartwright?"

"No, Hank, that's all."

"Well, I'm gonna head on home then. Your pa said you'd be home tonight, so I wanted to wait and fill you in about the ranch."

"I appreciate that. Good night."

Next, Adam knocked on Ming Lin's door. "Yes, Mr. Cartwright."

"Hop Sing said that you had been helping him at the Ponderosa."

"Yes, Mr. Cartwright."

"Your job here will be the same. The schedule will be the same as well. Is there anything else you need to know?"

"No, Mr. Cartwright. Hop Sing and I came to make sure the kitchen was stocked and in order, and I have moved everything for cleaning there. All the linens have been changed and washed. Breakfast will be ready at six-thirty."

Smiling, Adam said, "Good night," and headed up the stairs. When he opened the door, he found Shiloh sitting at her dressing table in her robe, brushing her hair. The corner of his mouth turned up, and he walked to his side of the bed and began to undress, thinking this was his life now, going to bed with a woman to hold, waking up at the crack of dawn, having breakfast with her, and then saying goodbye for the day as they went their separate ways. _That's a little different than I'd always imagined_. He'd always thought that he'd be leaving his wife at home after she prepared his breakfast, that she'd be waiting for him with supper prepared when he returned, and her day would be spent doing all those things that Marie had done; sewing, planting a garden and arranging flowers in vases for the house…taking care of the children. He'd known from the beginning that Shiloh was meant for other things, but he had never thought that he'd end up falling in love with her…not until San Francisco where she was in control, and he was merely a bystander…where she became the woman Edwin had described from Boston. He pulled the covers on the bed back and crawled in, sitting up and leaning back on a pillow propped up against the brass headboard, watching Shiloh as she finished brushing her hair. She stood and dropped her robe over the back of the chair, climbing in the bed next to him.

"Are you alright?" he asked, putting his arm around her.

Nestling in close and laying her head on his shoulder, she said, "I expected a letter from Edwin. I wonder how he's doing."

"There was a letter for me from Edwin. He said he's taking Edwina to New York. He's taken a position as the manager of a theater there."

"I'm…I just can't believe it. Mollie was so young. She died of pneumonia. She had been ill for a very long time. Even when she and Edwin were in San Francisco, I knew she wasn't feeling well."

Raising his hand, he ran his fingers into her hair and kissed her forehead. "I wish I could say something that would make you feel better."

She smiled weakly, and closed her eyes at the touch of his lips, pressing her body into his. "I'll be fine. It's just hard to understand why."

Leaning toward the night table, Adam blew out the lamp, and moved down under the covers with Shiloh following. He held her close, and even after sleep came over her and she turned away, he pulled her back, wanting to give her what comfort he could offer, even if it was just to remind her by his touch that she wasn't alone.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four **

When Adam awoke, Shiloh wasn't next to him. Propping himself up on his elbows, he looked around the room. She wasn't in the room. He got up, put on his robe and trotted down the stairs, finding her dressed for her day at the desk. When he stepped into the study, she didn't look up, so he cleared his throat.

She smiled and finally looked up. His eyes were half closed, his head was covered in tousled curls, and his face was scruffy, a look that had greeted her every morning for the last month and that she had come to love. "Good morning."

"Shiloh, it's four. What are you doing up?"

"I'm going through this mound of mail."

"At four in the morning?"

"I'm used to getting up at four. If you want more sleep, go back to bed."

"I'm used to getting up at six. When there's not a mound of mail to go through, what are you going to do at four in the morning? It's still dark outside."

"Plan the day before Hank gets here. That includes what I'm going to do with the horses, any errands I need to run, and then a little time in the evening for practicing or writing. But this morning, I think all I'm going to have time for is this mail. I need to ride over to the Ponderosa and get the horses. I don't think we'll have any more bad weather, so they can stay in the corral here. I'll ask Hank to have some of the men rebuild the shed." She smiled and looked back down at the stack of papers.

"No."

She looked back up. "No?"

Walking around the desk, he took the piece of paper she was holding away from her and placed it on the top of the stack, then pulled her to her feet and towed her behind him out of the study and to the stairs. "Adam, I've always gotten up at four...or four-thirty; sometimes five."

"From now on, you're getting up at six. Unless there's a cattle drive…then you can get up at four." When they got to the bedroom, Adam unbuttoned her shirt, then gently pushed her backward on the bed and pulled her boots off followed by her britches. After shrugging off his robe, letting it drop to the floor in the same pile as her clothes, he climbed over her to his side of the bed, then pulled her up to her pillow and covered both of them. Lying with an arm around her and her head on his shoulder, he closed his eyes. After a moment, he said, "Close your eyes."

"How do you know my eyes are open?"

"I can feel your eyelashes brushing my skin."

"But I'm wide awake. It's not like I can control this. I always wake up around four."

Turning over on his side, facing her, he nuzzled her cheek. "You didn't wake up at four while we were away."

She smiled, "Well, I was kept awake late into the night."

A half smile formed on Adam's lips. "Is that what it's going to take to change this habit?"

"I guess we still have a good bit to learn about each other, don't we?" she asked as she turned to face him.

He opened his eyes and found her watching him, looking amused. "You're not going back to sleep, are you?"

"We've been discussing this for half an hour."

Taking a deep breath, he said, "All right, let's get up," and sat up in the bed, running his fingers through his hair, scratching his scalp. "Tomorrow…six."

Shiloh made it back downstairs first and began to separate the mail. The theatres she had been corresponding with replied with the weeks they wanted her to appear. She also had several letters from some of the men that Jim had introduced her to as well as other inquires about horses. There were large packages from Slater and what she thought might be a solicitation for another timber bid for Adam.

When Adam joined her, she pushed several open envelopes over to him. "What do you make of these?"

He read the first one, and then glanced at the others. "Evidently, it's still not common knowledge that we're married, but I don't recognize any of these names. These could be from the original advertisement of the ranch for sale."

"There's one from Mr. Hearst in there."

"I see. That man just doesn't take no for an answer, does he?" said Adam, smiling down at her as he picked up his mail from Slater.

Standing, she walked around the desk and leaned into him as he sat on the edge. "If you'll look at my performance schedules with me this evening, I'll leave those and deal with the horse requests after I get back from the Ponderosa."

"Mr. Cartwright, breakfast is ready," said Ming Lin, who appeared at the door of the study.

"Thank you, Ming Lin," said Adam, putting a hand on the back of Shiloh's shoulder and ushering her toward the kitchen. Hank came in and joined them for coffee while they ate breakfast and discussed what he had planned for the day, and tentatively what he would have the men doing for the next week, including the rebuilding of the hay shed.

"When do you think you'll be able to start on the barn again?" asked Shiloh. "I'm anxious to get it finished."

Hank started to answer, but Adam interrupted him. "Why don't we wait until I can figure out when we can start on the house? If we can get into the house by fall, maybe we should just build the barn over there. The barn you have here is more than enough for this place if we decide to rent it."

"I had forgotten all about the house," answered Shiloh, scratching her head. "When do we talk about a dairy?"

"We don't for awhile. We're going to have our hands full with the timber contracts from Crocker this year. And we'll just have to remind Mr. Hearst that we're not going to be mining anytime soon. I'll ride over to the Ponderosa with you. I need to talk to Pa about all the timber contracts and how we're going to handle those along with the round-up."

"We need to talk to Hoss, too. If Hoss is going to be my partner, he needs to start learning now."

After breakfast, everyone headed out, Hank heading for the bunkhouse, and Adam and Shiloh to the barn to saddle their horses. Hank sent Billy to help with the horses that were at the Ponderosa.

When they arrived, Shiloh went straight to the corral where all her horses but Satan were kept. Johnny had been feeding them, and came over to the fence. "Miss Whitney…I mean, Mrs. Cartwright," he said blushing. "I thought you'd want to get these horses back home as soon as you could, so I got up early to take care of 'em."

"That's good, Johnny, because they are going home today." She looked over the small herd. "Where's Sampson?"

"Oh, I left him down in the south pasture with the other yearlings. He's too young to get into any trouble down there. Billy's been checking on him."

"Well, when we get them home, I want Sampson brought up with the others. We can't really keep calling him a yearling. He'll be two pretty soon, and he's going to be as big as Max was."

Adam had gone inside the house, and when he told Ben that Shiloh would be taking the horses back to the Flying W, the two men walked out to the corral. "Good morning, young lady," said Ben, smiling and holding out his arms. She stepped into him, and they hugged like father and daughter. "By the look on your face, I can see you're happy to see them."

"I can't wait to start working with them again. I've missed them."

"Uh, Shiloh, I'd like to talk to you before you leave."

"Pa, we need to talk about all these timber contracts, too."

"Why don't we go back inside and have some coffee then?" said Ben as he put his arm around Shiloh and walked her to the house. When they were seated around the desk with their coffee, Ben said, "I want to talk to you about Satan." Shiloh cocked her head, regarding him, and waited. "What plans do you have for him?"

Taking a deep breath, she answered, "Well, that depends entirely on what my mares produce this year. I had planned on gelding him, but after Max died, I decided to postpone that until I see what we get. And I know why you're asking. My reasoning is the same as my father's. It would take a lot of money and time to import new stock. I'd rather breed it if I can."

"Shiloh, surely you don't want to breed Satan's disposition."

"Mr. Cartwright…" Ben lowered his head and raised his eyebrows, and Shiloh took another deep breath. "Pa, do you remember the trouble Daddy had with Max. I realize Satan killed a man, but Max broke one's back, and look how he turned out."

"Satan's the one that killed Smalley?" asked Adam, looking worriedly at Shiloh.

She folded her lips into a tight line and looked down at her coffee. "Adam, do you remember one of the men at Jim's asked me if I could train bad habits out of a horse? Daddy did it with Max, but I don't know if I can. If I can train Satan, then I can train bad habits out of any horse."

Adam tilted his head slightly and narrowed his eyes. "When were you going to tell me you were going to try to train that animal?"

Drawing herself up straight, she said, "I didn't think I needed to tell you what I was going to do with the horses. They were supposed to be mine to do with as I pleased."

Ben raised his hands. "Now, just hold on. Shiloh, we already know he's dangerous. Just getting into a corral alone with him is taking a big risk."

"How will I ever know if I don't try?" she asked, first looking at Ben and then back at Adam. "You have no idea how this will go. Satan is one of the most perfect horses we've bred, except for Max, and now Sampson, but Sampson's too young. It will be another year before I'll even consider starting him." Adam sat his coffee cup on the desk and clasped his hands, resting his chin on them. "Adam, you promised. Decisions regarding the horses are mine."

"I never agreed to you putting your life at risk."

"I need to be able to breed Satan. If I can't, I may lose what makes these horses so unique…so beautiful. Please, Adam. If he becomes too difficult…I'll geld him, but please, let me try."

Propping his chin on his thumb, Adam looked over at his father, who was shaking his head. "You are not to work alone with that horse. One of the men will be watching you with a rifle, and if that horse even looks like he's about to come at you, he'll have orders to shoot." She crossed her arms defiantly and looked away. "Take it or leave it," said Adam, raising his eyebrows.

"What choice do I have?" she said sarcastically.

Ben didn't agree with Adam, but he wasn't going to voice his opinion. It was none of his business at this point. All he could do was be ready to pick up the pieces when something happened, and he was sure something would.

Hoss ambled down the stairs and made his way over to the desk. "Hoss, I'm glad you're here," said Adam. "What do you think about learning to train horses?"

A wide grin took over Hoss's face, and then he looked at his father and swallowed. "Well, Adam, how much time are we talkin', 'cause I'm gonna have a lot more to do now that you're over at the Flying W."

"Hoss, I have no intention of abandoning the Ponderosa. Hank handles the cattle at the Flying W just fine without me. I can do the Slater work in the evenings. I'll just have to do more coordination to make sure nothing gets missed. And that includes all the timber contracts. Pa, we need to talk about what we already have. The first of the Crocker contracts will be for ties, and we can go ahead and mark the trees for those, but if we want the railroad business, we'll have to walk away from some of the other bids."

Ben nodded as he began to pull papers out of the desk. "The amount of work isn't the only problem. We can only take what we will have teams for. Ottis Watts is the only one within a hundred miles who has those big draft horses, and we'll be competing for them."

"Actually, that's not true," said Adam, looking sideways at Shiloh. "What about the horses you keep in your lower pasture next to the spring?"

"I didn't realize you had noticed them. Mr….Pa, do you remember that Daddy had plans to plant some crops? He did plant some wheat and buffalo grass, and he planted corn, too, but he never planted on the same scale he had when he and Momma lived in the South. He even made a plow with three blades. It took two men to use it."

Leaning back in his chair, Ben nodded. "Yes, I do remember that."

"Well, I still have the horses Daddy was going to use to pull that plow. He also used them to remove stumps when he was clearing fields. All that wheat and buffalo grass that he planted is what they're eating. It's too rich for the other horses, but it keeps these big ones satisfied. He kept them, thinking he would eventually do some farming. I have twelve full-grown and some younger ones. They're heavier than Eli and Satan, just as tall, and stockier. They've got good solid legs and hooves."

Adam pursed his lips. "What else do we have that you thought I hadn't noticed?"

"A forge."

Adam cocked his head for a moment, then looked at her with round eyes. "We have a forge?"

"How do you think we keep up with all those hooves?" She turned to Ben. "Pa, can I have some of Hoss's time? If he can come over three mornings a week for a few hours, that's all I need to get him started learning to train. Then when you and Adam figure out all the time you'll need to handle all these timber contracts, we can adjust if we need to. And Hank and our men can help with the round-up…like Micah used to. We can do one ranch first, and then the other, and we can combine our cattle drives. That'll put extra men on both ranches when they're at their busiest."

Ben looked at Adam. "She's right, Pa. When Micah and I worked together and shared men, we were able to do more work and do it faster. We did it again last year, if you'll remember. It still works."

"I remember," he said, nodding. "Alright then, we'll do it the way we used to. That should give you time to do the extra work you've taken on," he said, looking at Adam. He turned to Hoss. "And that should give you time to work with Shiloh's horses, if that's what you want to do."

Hoss grinned. "Thanks, Pa."

"Now, if you gentlemen will excuse me, I need to get those horses back home, and then go through the requests I have." When Shiloh rose from her chair, Ben and Adam stood as well.

"I'll walk you out," said Adam.

"Hey Shiloh, when do you want me to start?" asked Hoss.

"How about in the morning…say around seven?"

Smiling and nodding, Hoss said, "I'll be there at six-thirty."

Adam and Shiloh had gotten to the porch when he grabbed her arm and turned her around. "I don't want to find out that you and Satan were in a corral before I tell Hank to post a man." He watched her come to a boil, then fight to stay calm.

"This is no different than what you do when you break horses. Should I forbid you to do it any longer because you're putting your life at risk?"

"There is a difference. I can take a much bigger jolt than you, and there are handlers in the corral with me."

"Oh, really?" she said, crossing her arms. Seeing the flare of her nostrils and that all-too-familiar fire in her eyes, he braced himself. "I've been thrown from horses before, and other than a few scratches and bruises, I was fine."

"Then you were lucky," he said calmly.

"I'm sure it has something to do with the proportion of weight to bone and force with which you hit the ground. I'd be willing to bet you that my number turns out to be better than yours." Stepping closer and looking up at him impudently, she said, "You're an engineer. Figure it out."

Adam breathed out as he stonily met her glare, and then smirked. "I'm not going to argue with you. Leave Satan here. I'll bring him home when I come."

"Is everything alright?" asked Ben, stepping out onto the porch.

Shiloh had just opened her mouth to light into Adam, but at the sight of Ben, she took a step back. Adam continued to stare her down, his mouth drawn, his nostrils flared and anger in his eyes. "Everything is just…wonderful," she growled, and stepped off the porch toward the corral.

Looking at the floor of the porch, Adam scratched behind his ear. "I'll be in a minute, Pa," he said without the slightest edge in his voice. While Ben retreated to the house, Adam walked to the corral next to the barn where Satan was kept and leaned back against the gate with his arms crossed and a look on his face that dared Shiloh to try to get to the horse. She didn't go near Satan's corral, but rather she gathered her horses and left.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

When Adam walked into the house, he went into the living area where Ben had the timber contracts they had won and those they were bidding on spread out on the coffee table. Taking a seat on the hearth, Adam stared for a moment at the table.

"She's just like her father, you know…when it comes to those horses," said Ben. Adam propped his elbows on his thighs and clasped his hands, but said nothing. "She is right about Max. There was a time when he was just as mean as Satan, so it would seem training bad habits out of a horse is possible."

"She's already admitted that she doesn't know if she can."

"Did you think her determination was just going to disappear because you married her?"

Taking a deep breath, Adam answered, "No Pa, I didn't, but I did think it had gotten easier to reason with her."

"Maybe you should try reasoning with her instead of giving her an ultimatum." Adam twisted his mouth and raised his eyebrows, then quietly chuckled. "Now, let's figure out these contracts." Pointing to the piles of paper in front of them, Ben said, "These are the bids we've already won, and these are the bids we're still working on separated by local and distant delivery. I think we need to consider how easy it's going to be to deliver the timber and if we have to do any milling when we decide which ones to bid and which ones to leave."

"Well, we know we'll have at least five from Crocker, and the first few of those will be for ties, so those will be straight forward and easy to deliver. If I remember correctly, one of these that we've won is for hardwood to extend the wharf in San Francisco, and the other one is for timbers that have to be milled for new square sets for the Overman Number Two mine." Adam spread the other five contracts out, and picked one of them up, tossing it in front of his father who was sitting on the settee across from him. "That one is the biggest one, but a good bit of that profit will go into the effort to get that timber to San Francisco, and then hire a ship to get it to Boston. We're the only West coast timber outfit they've asked for a bid. We can't compete with the timber companies that own land in the mountains over there."

Ben picked up the contract and set it aside, then spread the remaining four across the table. Adam picked up another one. "This one is for timber for a new school in Arizona City. There's no easy way to get timber down there other than to haul it, and we'd be hauling it through desert."

"That leaves the Gould and Curry, the Yellow Jacket and the Chollar; all of them local," said Ben.

"If we can keep the cutting and milling going, I think we can supply these three mines, plus the Overman Number Two as they need it. The five Crocker contracts will be spaced out as the tracks are built with some extra as they get closer to the Sierra for trestles, and we don't have to mill it, so the mill will be running nothing but square sets. We can start that now. For the docks, all we have to do is get the raw lumber to Sacramento. They'll be taking it the rest of the way on a steamer."

"Adam, we've never come close to ten contracts in a single year."

"We're definitely going to be busy," laughed Adam. "But I think we can do it. It's either that or tell one or two of these mines we won't bid, and that might send them somewhere else the next time they need square sets."

"If you'll take these three and price them out, I'll go into town tomorrow and start hiring crews. Take a look at Shiloh's horses and make sure they'll work."

"I'll have to fix up some harnesses to pull logs, but if we have a forge, that won't be a problem. Can Joe start marking timber?"

"He's working on the pond in the north pasture. The gate is stuck in the mud, and he's cleaning it out."

Adam stood, heading for the front door. "I'll ride out and see if I can give him a hand. If we can get it cleared, do you think he can start tomorrow?"

"Adam, we have normal spring repairs and round-up coming up. Someone has to be here," said Ben as he walked Adam out onto the porch."

"Well, Hoss and Hank can handle the round-ups, and I'll take care of sending men out for fence and outbuilding repairs. After that I'll go where I'm needed. That way, we make sure none of it slips."

Holding Sport's reins as Adam mounted, Ben said, "Once I get the crews hired, I can help. Adam?" Adam looked down at his father. "Listen to her. She might surprise you."

Adam nodded. "I'll come back for Satan after I help Joe with the gate." He turned and left for the north pasture.

When Shiloh rode into the Flying W yard, she dismounted and turned to Billy and Johnny. "Get the horses settled. Put the mares in the front and the rest of them in the back. I have to go down to the south corral and see what horses I have to fill some requests. I'll bring Sampson back with me."

"Uh, Mrs. Cartwright? Mr. Cartwright told me I had to go with you. He said you were still being followed."

Letting her head flop backwards, she breathed deeply to keep from yelling at Johnny. "I want you to stay with the horses, Johnny. Get one of other hands to go with me."

"Yes, Ma'am. I'll have to ride out to the herd."

She clenched her teeth and looked at the ground, kicking the dirt up into dust. "That's all right. I have to go through the requests anyway. I'll be in the house."

When Johnny returned, he went to the house and told Shiloh the hand was waiting. She gathered her notes and the book holding the list of her horses and left for the south pasture with her escort riding close behind.

xxxxxxxx

Adam rode into the yard covered from head to toe in dried mud, leading Satan behind him. He and Joe had been able to clear the gate, but it involved shoveling mud out and away. He had almost forgotten Satan, and was almost home when he remembered, but decided the conversation he knew he was going to have with Shiloh would go easier if the horse was home.

Johnny met him at the hitching rail. "Mr. Cartwright, I'll take him off your hands."

"Where do you keep him?"

"He's got his own paddock next to the barn away from the others."

"Is Mrs. Cartwright in the house?"

"No sir. She's down at the south pasture matching horses to all those inquiries that came in the mail."

"Is she alone?"

"No sir. She took one of the hands with her."

Nodding, Adam said, "Thank you, Johnny," then remounted and turned Sport south. When he arrived, he found her escort and waved him back to the ranch house, then dismounted, and walked down the fence line toward the gate, not noticing that he passed Shiloh who was standing in the pasture.

She stopped writing in her book and watched his head moving back and forth as if he were having a conversation while he walked down the fence line. "Are you talking to me?"

He stopped and turned. "I didn't say anything."

"Oh, you said a mouthful."

He clasped his hands in front of him. "And what did I say?"

"Since you're used to telling me what to do, you were practicing how you were going to reason with me since you're not very good at doing that."

Biting the inside of his cheek, he dropped his eyes, trying to think of how to respond, and questioning his decision to send her to college.

"What you were going to say is that it isn't unreasonable to ask that I have a handler close by. You all do it when you're working with wild horses, and Satan, though he's used to being around me, can certainly be accused of acting like a wild animal."

He cut his eyes to the right, thinking that sounded pretty good…reasonable, so he was going to go with it. "And what else?"

Sighing heavily, she moved her eyes upward, then closed her book and cast her eyes downward. "That you're just trying to look out for me because you don't want me to get hurt."

Climbing over the fence, he stood in front of her. "And is that so bad?" he asked, turning up the corner of his mouth.

"No, that part isn't. But it is when you start by telling me what to do after you already told me the horses were mine." He reached for her, and she stepped back. "So…I will have a handler standing by, but he will not be in the corral with me. The training depends on the horse being isolated. He has to come to trust me completely, and he can't do that if he's distracted by someone else." She hung her head. "And if I can't handle him, I'll geld him myself."

When he reached for her again, she let him take her hands. "Thank you."

"Don't mention it," she answered, but she was thinking that she had dodged the proverbial bullet of him completely forbidding her to train Satan. She walked in front of him toward the fence, and looked up to the sky, saying a silent prayer of thanks that he could accept that what she said was reasonable. "What happened to you?" she asked, climbing over the fence.

"The gate in the north pasture pond was stuck. Joe and I had to dig the pond out."

Taking several halters off her saddle horn, she climbed back over the fence into the pasture. "I think I can fill some of these requests with some of the horses I have, but a few of them are going to be hard to find. Would you mind if I ask the men to let me see the horses they bring in from the range? I might find what I'm looking for there."

He watched her while she haltered three horses and walked them to the gate. "I'll make sure the men let you see them before they start breaking." He took the reins of the haltered horses while she mounted Spirit, then handed her two of them. Walking to Sport, he mounted and led the third horse back to the ranch house.

When they arrived, Johnny took the horses. "We're running out of corral space up here," said Shiloh. "Move all the horses but the mares and Satan to the pasture back there," she said, pointing behind the barn, "and put these three in the corral. Make sure someone is watching the horses back there around the clock."

Walking into the house, Adam turned toward the bath house, and Shiloh headed to the stairs. "I'm going to change for supper," she said. "I'll bring you some clean clothes."

Before she stepped away, he grabbed her hand and pulled her to him. He didn't say anything, but rather met her eyes, kissing her and looking back to her eyes, waiting for the smile he knew would appear. He kissed her one more time before he released her hand, then watched as she ascended the stairs and disappeared into their bedroom.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

Shiloh left clothes for Adam in the bath house before she went to the study to go through the horse requests, marking those she could fill. She looked at the performance schedules and marked the weeks she preferred. Of course, those would also depend on whether Adam had to travel for Slater. She was sure Adam would insist on going with her. As long as Will was close and her shadow was unidentified, someone would constantly be with her on the ranch, and elsewhere, Adam would be by her side. She smiled, thinking that she should feel lucky that he loved her that way, but there was still a part of her that resented being coddled. That wasn't all. She was about to disappoint him yet again. Her missing monthly had appeared.

When he entered the study, she was holding her head in her hand, tapping a pencil on the desk. "It can't be that bad," he said quietly.

"Adam…"

"Mr. Cartwright, dinner is ready," said Ming Lin from somewhere behind him.

"Thank you, Ming Lin. We'll be there in a minute."

"Shiloh?"

Standing, she walked around the desk and took his hand. "We can talk after dinner."

When they were seated, Ming Lin excused himself, leaving them alone. "Were you able to figure out what timber contracts you'll bid?"

"We're taking the local contracts. There were two others, but moving the timber those distances would take too much time. We have seven contracts, and we'll be bidding on three more. In fact, I need to work on those bids tonight. Can we talk about your performance schedules tomorrow?"

"That's fine. I wasn't going to try to take any before July, and Julia Dean is performing at the grand opening of Maguire's on July third. I'd like to be there. I'll be in Sacramento in August, so that leaves September and October."

"What's happening in June?"

Smiling pensively, she said, "I'll have more foals than I know what to do with. I need to get some pasture space cleared and planted before then."

"I'd like to look at your draft horses and see the forge after dinner. I'll need to refit some harnesses to pull logs."

"We might already have what you need, though they'll probably need some repairs. Daddy used harnesses similar to Ottis' harnesses when he was clearing land for fields and pastures. There's tack and equipment storage in the same building as the forge. The harnesses are hanging on the wall right where Daddy left them."

"Well good. That'll save us some time."

Glancing up at her, Adam realized she had stopped eating. "Ming Lin learned well. This is almost as good as Hop Sings." When she didn't respond, he watched her. "What's wrong?"

"Hm? Oh, nothing is wrong. It's just…it's our first full day back. We didn't even have time to take a breath before…"

"We can't afford to let the railroad slip through our fingers. At the same time, we can't afford to let the mines figure out they can go somewhere else for their square sets." She nodded. "Sweetheart, it's spring. Every spring seems overwhelming, but once we get everything going, things will settle down."

"I know," she said, nodding. "Adam, would you mind if we look at the horses and the forge tomorrow morning? I think I'd just like to curl up with a good book tonight while you work on the timber bids."

"This would be a good time for you to learn how to do them," he said, looking up at her from under his brow as he took his last bite of dinner.

"I don't know that I want to anymore." He propped his elbows on the table and folded one hand over the other, looking perplexed. "There's really no need for me to learn that now that we're married. I'm not running the ranch alone anymore, and at the time I thought I did need to learn it, I had no idea I would be marrying you. In fact, at the time, I didn't think anyone would have me."

Wiping his mouth with his napkin, Adam stood and walked around table, talking her hand. He looked at her plate disapprovingly, and then looked back at her, but she avoided his eyes. Leading her into the parlor, he sat down on a chair in front of the fireplace, pulling her down on his lap and surrounding her with his arms. "There's something going on that you're not telling me, and neither of us is getting up from this chair until you do."

"Real life has hit with a vengeance, that's all," she said, laying her head on his shoulder.

He kissed her and asked, "Are you sure that's all?"

"What else would it be? We've already argued about the horses."

He snorted. "We didn't argue about the horses. We argued about Satan. And your reasonableness seemed quite reasonable to me." She drew in one side of her mouth and narrowed her eyes. "You didn't think you'd gotten away with that, did you?" She looked away, and he laughed. "You did think you'd gotten away with that."

"I suppose Satan is part of it. I wonder what name I should give him once he's trained." Adam creased his brows. "Daddy renamed Max after he was trained."

"What was his name?"

"Diablo." Adam's mouth formed an 'o'. "I'm going to take a bath and then go upstairs to read while you work on your bids. Promise me you won't be too late."

"I don't think it will take too long. We've supplied square sets to all of these mines before."

She touched his cheek and leaned up to kiss him. "I'll wait for you." Standing, he lifted her up with him and walked her out of the parlor, watching her climb the stairs, then retreated to the study to work on the timber contracts.

Over an hour later, he opened the door to the bedroom and found her curled up on a chair near the lamp, reading, wearing a flannel gown with her hair braided. "I thought you weren't angry with me."

Closing the book, she set it on the table next to the lamp. "I put this off because I knew you'd be disappointed."

He knelt next to the chair, took her hand and breathed in deeply, nodding. "Is this what's been bothering you all evening?"

"Part of it," she responded with sad eyes.

"It's not all bad. We'll be better prepared. And you won't feel trapped." He rose and pulled her up from the chair. She slid under the covers while Adam blew out the lamp. Undressing, he slid under the covers next to her, and they fell asleep in each other's arms.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

Adam had gotten up at six sharp while Shiloh still lay in the bed. Bending down to her, he kissed her lips. "Are you getting up, Miss four in the morning?"

She yawned. "I didn't sleep well last night."

"You don't have to get up. I can meet with Hank this morning."

Sitting up on the side of the bed, she answered, "No. I'm up. Hoss is supposed to be here this morning. Why don't you go on down and get started. I'll be down in a minute."

After Adam left the room, she took care of her necessities, and dressed, then joined him for breakfast. Hoss had already arrived and was working on his second breakfast of the morning. Leaning against the door frame, she watched as the two brothers ate.

"Adam, I just don't understand why that Stewart fella keeps coming after her. He knows she's married, don't he?"

"He does. He might have loved her once, but I don't think that's it anymore. She walked away from him, and then she married me. Even in college, people didn't tell Will Stewart 'no'. He got this way. Except with me. And then he didn't get his way with her… He's obsessed, Hoss, and that makes him dangerous."

"You think he'll come after her again?"

"There's only one reason he moved to San Francisco, and that was to get closer to her."

"Can you two do me a favor and stop talking about Will Stewart?" Shiloh pushed herself away from the door frame and walked to the table, sitting between them.

Looking up from his plate, Adam looked apologetically at her. "I didn't know you were there."

While Hoss poured her a cup of coffee, Adam passed the eggs and bacon, then put a biscuit on her plate as she served herself. "Do you want some gravy for your biscuit?"

"No, just butter and preserves."

"Hoss, you can go with us to look at the draft horses Shiloh has and tell me what you think."

Talking with his mouth full, Hoss said, "That's fine with me if Shiloh's alright with it."

"I have to go anyway, and while we're down there, I want to pick a horse for you to work with and bring it up. The horse you'll be working with has to be isolated for a few days before you start. I have a journal for you to read, too. What are your plans today?" she asked, turning to Adam.

"I need to take those three bids back over to the Ponderosa so Pa can go over them, and if he agrees with them, I'll ride into the town and deliver them."

"You don't have to do that," said Hoss. "Pa's going back to town today to hire men for the crews. Turns out Mr. Fuller's hiring, too, so he's got some competition. But I'll tell you what you _do_ need to do. You need to go on over to the breaking corral with me to take a look at the horses comin' in. If we're combining round-up and cattle drives, we're gonna need the extra horses."

"I have to spend some time today working on some drawings for Slater."

"Well, let's get down there then and look at those draft horses," said Hoss, standing.

"Wait, what about Hank?" asked Shiloh.

Adam stood, and waited for her. "He's already come and gone."

"You spoke to him without me?"

Adam held his hands out as he explained, "He's not doing anything different than he said yesterday. It wasn't really much of a conversation."

Shiloh huffed and walked past him to the front door, gathering her hat and jacket and leaving the brothers behind as she headed for the barn.

"What's the matter with her?"

Opening his mouth, Adam put on his hat, and then raised his hand as if he was going to say something and thought better of it, shaking his head and stepping out the door.

When they arrived at the south pasture, Adam and Hoss stood at the fence waiting for Shiloh who was digging through her saddle bag and emerged carrying a burlap bag of carrot pieces. "When I'm working with horses, these stay with me." She put her thumb and index finger in her mouth and blew a shrill whistle that made Adam and Hoss cringe. Looking out at the pasture, they soon saw the horses that had been off in the distance come thundering toward them.

"You feel that, Adam?" asked Hoss, first looking down at his feet, then at Adam with a surprised smile.

Shiloh watched proudly as the horses approached them. Stepping up on the corral fence and climbing over, she waited for the giant horses to gather around her. In a split second Adam was up on the fence, pulling her backwards, but she shrugged out of his hands. "Calm down, Adam. These horses are as gentle as babies."

Adam watched as they surrounded her, all of them patiently waiting for her hand to touch their muzzle where they knew a carrot would be waiting. She reached up to each one, and as she went from horse to horse, the horses didn't move...she walked upright underneath their heads. Even Adam and Hoss had to look up at them as they stood beside them.

"These are good lookin' horses, Shiloh. You sure you want to use 'em to pull logs?"

She stopped and slowly turned to Hoss with a blank expression. "What else do you suggest I do with them? I can't ride them. I don't have any saddles this big, and even if I did, my legs wouldn't go even half-way around their bellies." She snorted. "I'd need a ladder to get up on one."

"They make Ottis' horses look scrawny," said Adam as he walked among them. "We should rent them out when we don't need them."

Hoss had walked over to the younger horses with carrots. "How old are these fellas?"

"These are yearlings."

"There must be somethin' wrong with my ears. Did I just hear you say yearlings?"

"I don't think you'd recognize a foal if you compare them to other foals. The foals weigh almost two hundred pounds at birth."

Whistling, Hoss looked back over at Adam. "They gonna give us any problems? I'd hate to have one of these horses cut loose in a loggin' camp."

"You won't have any trouble. These are some of the gentlest horses I have," she answered, straining to reach the nose of the mare she was feeding. "But you will have to shoe them."

Adam and Hoss looked down. "That might take two people," said Adam, raising his brows while Hoss pushed his bottom lip up and nodded his agreement.

They left the draft horses at the fence, and went to another pasture to retrieve a horse for Hoss to train, then went back to the ranch house. Shiloh walked them behind the house to a building that had been closed up tight every time Adam had been back there. Taking a key out of her pocket, Shiloh unlocked the padlock on the double doors and swung them open. She waited a moment for her eyes to adjust to the darkness, and then disappeared toward the back wall.

"Here are the harnesses you'll be using for them." Adam and Hoss had followed her back. "You'll have to go over these and make some repairs, but I don't think it'll be anything major. There are six sets."

"I reckon the first thing we need to do is get the horses shod, but I gotta ride out to the herd and have the men start rounding up the calves."

"Can't Joe do that?"

"Pa done sent 'im up to start markin' timber. He's a might nervous about all these contracts."

"Well, the only reason we're going to be able to do this is because there's only two sets; ties in the beginning of the Crocker contracts and square sets for all the others, except the docks, and all we have to do is cut and haul those to Sacramento. We can cut those now. I figure we can hire some teamsters to haul them, so only one of us has to go to Sacramento. We're already set up for the square sets at the mill, so if we can supply the timber as they need it, we can do everyone at the same time."

"By the sound of it, we'll be cutting all through summer."

"I'll go get the men started rounding up the calves," said Adam. "Billy and Johnny can start bringing up the…Shiloh, what are those horses?"

Shiloh was standing behind them, leaning prominently on one leg with her arms crossed. "Clydesdales."

"Johnny and Billy can start bringing up the Clydesdales, and you can start making shoes; that is if we have enough iron." Adam walked back to the door. "I'm going by the Ponderosa first to drop off those bids. I'll come back that way and bring back what iron I can find."

Shiloh turned sideways between them and spoke loudly. "Are you forgetting something?" Turning, Adam looked with his head craned forward, waiting.

"Hoss is here to work with me."

Drawing his lips into a tight line, he spun on his heel, and walked back into the forge, nodding. "Hoss, work with Shiloh first, and when you're finished, make shoes. I'll be back as soon as I can."


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

Every other morning with Hoss turned into every morning. He had a way with the animals that set them at ease so much that he was training his first horse much faster than Shiloh had anticipated. He spent most of his time the first week listening to her explain the setup of the pen and paddock and reading her journal, and he was particularly appreciative of her explanations about her mistakes.

The Clydesdales had been shod and the harnesses had been repaired. The camp for the timber contract for the docks had already been set up. Only three horses were required to move the logs since each horse could pull a ton of weight on his own. By the end of April, the timber was ready to be shipped, and Ben had gone in search of teamsters to haul them to Sacramento.

Shiloh had finally corralled Adam to go over her performance schedules with her, and they settled on two weeks in September and two weeks in October in addition to the two weeks in August already signed. Those contracts had been sent out, and they were waiting for the return of the signed copies.

The Ponderosa round-up had been completed, and the men were well into the round-up at the Flying W. With the extra men from each ranch, the fence repairs and outbuilding repairs had begun.

Shiloh and Adam had been going in different directions for most of the month, and this particular evening, they both came in late, both sweaty, dirty and frustrated. When they met at the barn where they had both just ridden up, they exchanged few words while they bedded down their horses and slowly walked to the house, dragging from the day's work. Shiloh ducked into the kitchen while Adam slowly ascended the stairs toward their bedroom. When she appeared at the bedroom door, she stood still for a moment, studying Adam who had removed his chaps and was sitting with his head in his hands on the side of the bed.

"Are you alright?"

"Mm hm. Just sore. I've been breaking horses today."

Closing the door behind her, she began to undress. Adam looked up, watching her, and jumped up from the bed, grabbing her arm when he saw a large bruise on her forearm. "What happened?"

"A horse bit me."

His eyes flared right along with his nostrils. "What horse?"

"Adam, it doesn't matter. I've been bitten by horses before. It comes with the territory. Besides, that was a few days ago."

Relaxing his grip on her arms, he let out a breath. "Why didn't I notice that?"

She smiled weakly. "You've been working late." She finished undressing and slipped on a robe. "I'm going to take a hot bath. I asked Ming Lin if we could wait an hour for dinner. He's begun to wait until we're home to start dinner anyway."

"I'm going to clean up and work on some drawings."

"You got some mail from Slater today. It's on the desk," she said, walking toward the door, but she stopped, and with her head bowed, she slowly turned around. "I have a better idea." He had sat down again and was taking off his boots, but stopped and looked back up at her. Holding her hand out to him, she said, "Get your robe and come with me."

Taking her hand, he followed her out, lifting his robe off the back of the door on his way. They walked down the stairs together and into the bath house. Adam smiled for the first time this evening when Shiloh closed the door and dropped her robe. The first night she was late getting in, she had asked Ming Lin to prepare a hot bath, and since then, he had started preparing the steaming bath each evening upon her arrival. Stepping into the tub, she slowly sank down, letting the heat of the water sooth her. "Well don't just stand there. Get out of those dirty clothes and join me," she said with a grin that Adam hadn't seen in…well, he couldn't remember seeing it lately.

Standing next to the tub, he motioned for her to move forward, then stepped in behind her and moaned in delight when he lowered himself into the hot water, taking her shoulders and reclining her back onto his chest. They exhaled in unison as heat coaxed the soreness and tension out of their bodies.

Lying against him with her eyes closed, she asked, "Have things slowed down for you at all?"

"I don't really expect them to until the round-up and repairs are done. But this is normal for spring."

"I don't remember you being this exhausted."

"Sweetheart, we've always gotten in at dark. Before Slater, I was able to relax in the evenings, but right now, I have to work. We talked about this. We both knew it would be busy in the beginning until we got things organized."

"You're not organizing, Adam. You're still doing as much work on the ranch as you did before we were married."

That's not quite true. Joe and Hoss are doing more with the cattle and the repairs. I'm spending quite a bit of time setting up the lumber camps and getting those started. Now that we've won the last three, we have to start cutting and milling square sets."

"Then why were you breaking horses today?"

"Because we don't have any one who can stay on, so Joe and I have to do it until we can find someone. And what about you? I thought you would be working with your horses in the mornings."

"I had to swap. I felt like I was disturbing your father, so I go to the Ponderosa in the mornings and work with the horses in the late afternoon. I've got more requests. Jim is still sending people my way, and even though Hoss is helping, he's still learning. I'd like to train someone else. I think with three training, we'll be able to keep up. But we don't have the facilities I need to be training that many horses at once." She paused and listened, but only heard his deep, slow breathing. "What are the chances we can get the piano moved?"

"We'll need to hire more help. I'll need some men who can handle carpentry to start the house anyway. I could get them to help with the piano before they start the house."

"When were you planning to start the house?"

"Soon."

When she sat up and began to bathe, he leaned forward, taking the sponge from her and began scrubbing her back. She hung her head forward. "That feels so good."

Kissing from her shoulder all the way up her neck, he whispered, "My turn next."

After a few minutes, they both turned around so Shiloh could scrub his back. When she finished, she stood, laying her hands on his shoulders and pushing herself up. "I'm going to get dressed for dinner," she said, tying her robe around her. He took her hand and pulled her down toward him, and she kissed his waiting lips. "Why don't you soak a little longer? I'll bring your clothes down."

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Ming Lin had put dinner on the table while Shiloh waited in the parlor, looking out the window toward the barn. Satan…she wanted to start working with Satan, but she was going to have to ask for a ranch hand to watch her. For days, she had been trying to work out a way to ask Hank to send her someone without Adam finding out, but whenever she saw Hank, Adam was with her. She knew Adam would insist on picking someone out himself, and giving that person very specific instructions, and she was afraid those instructions would include shooting the horse. If this had been before they were married, she'd have no trouble going forward with it on her own. But she was his wife now, and she knew that Adam would be angry if she started without telling him. Still, not telling him would make her immediate life much simpler.

Adam stood just inside the parlor, watching her. He could see where she was looking and knew she was thinking about Satan. When he touched her arms, she jumped, and then relaxed when he stepped into her back, holding her against him. "Come to the table. We can talk about Satan over dinner."

Shiloh sat staring at her empty plate, while Adam prepared his. "Aren't you going to eat?" he asked.

"I'm not very hungry."

Adam turned toward her. "You can't keep going if you don't start eating."

"How am I supposed to eat when I'm not hungry?"

Taking her plate and preparing it for her, he said, "It's actually pretty easy. You put a bite in your mouth, chew it, and swallow it." She simmered. "Do you want to be confined to the bed because you're too weak to walk?"

She rolled her eyes. "Adam, I eat breakfast and lunch. I've just never really eaten an evening meal."

"You didn't eat lunch today," he said, replacing her plate in front of her with pork roast, potatoes, carrots and bread. He sat the gravy boat next to her plate.

"How do you know that? Are you spying on me?"

"And what if I were?"

"You don't trust me?" she asked with a hurt look.

"Don't even try that look on me. When it comes to eating, no, I don't trust you." She grudgingly picked up her fork and knife and began eating. Glancing back at her, he smiled slightly. "Now, you wanted to talk about Satan."

She put a bite of roast in her mouth and stared ahead of her, chewing slowly. When she swallowed, she put her fork down and drank some water, then sat for a moment. With her head bowed, she said, "I want to start training him."

"When?"

"Tomorrow."

"How about day after tomorrow?" With that question, he had gotten her attention. "We need supplies, and I thought we could take a break and go into town together. Maybe have lunch in town."

She didn't know what to say, and just looked back down at her plate, finally settling on something simple. "Why?"

"Because it's your birthday."

When he covered her hand, she smiled at her plate. "How are we going to do that? You're supposed to be up at the timber camp, I'm expecting Hoss over here, and there's your Slater work and…"

"Hoss is going up to the camp for me tomorrow, and I'll be finishing up the drawings for Slater tonight. We haven't had any appreciable amount of time alone since we came back from San Francisco, and when we have had a little time, we were both tired." Waiting for her to look up at him, he added. "You can even sleep in tomorrow…until seven." He succeeded getting a short laugh out of her. "Now, eat…please."

After dinner while Shiloh sat in the parlor going through her sheet music, Adam rose from the desk in the study to answer a knock at the front door. "Adam, how are you this evening?"

"Roy?" said Adam, looking past Roy at the gentlemen dressed in a suit standing behind him. "Is this an official visit?"

"I'm afraid so. Is the Missus home?"

Stepping aside, Adam motioned them in, and after closing the door, he led them to the parlor. "Shiloh, the sheriff is here to see you."

She looked up. "Me?" she said, straightening the sheet music in her lap. "Well, would you gentlemen like some coffee?"

"That might be a good idea," said Roy. "This is Officer Riley from the San Francisco police department. It seems the young lady you scuffled in the mud with last winter…well, she's been found dead."


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

Shiloh quickly stood, dumping the sheet music out of her lap into the floor. "Oh, I'm so sorry. Please, have a seat. It will only take a moment for me to gather this up."

Adam rushed over and began picking up the papers. "Shiloh, I'll get this. Why don't you ask Ming Lin to brew some coffee?" He caught her eyes, and without saying a word, he calmed her.

Taking a deep breath, she rose. "Please excuse me for just a moment."

When she had left the room, Adam stood with handfuls of sheet music, and after placing it on a side table, he sat in another chair and leaned forward. "Natalie Peterson is dead?"

"Did you know her, Mr. Cartwright?"

"Yes, I've know her for years. I met her in Boston when I was away at college."

"And Mrs. Cartwright? How did she know Miss Peterson?"

"They met in Virginia City last year."

"Coffee will be ready in a moment," said Shiloh as she came back into the parlor. The men stood and waited for her to be seated, then resumed their conversation.

"Mrs. Cartwright, I understand you fought with Miss Peterson."

She took a deep breath. "Yes, I did. I was trying on my wedding gown, and when I came out of the dress shop, she pushed me off the boardwalk and into the mud. By that time, I'd had enough of her and pulled her down into the mud with me, and…we fought."

"You fought?"

"That's what Mrs. Cartwright said," said Roy. "They rolled around in the mud, pullin' hair, clawin' and slappin.'"

"I didn't mean…"

"Well, she said they fought. Now isn't that the way ladies fight?"

"Mrs. Cartwright, you said you'd had about enough. Did something else happen?"

"Now just wait. Is my wife a suspect?"

"At this point, Mr. Cartwright, everyone is a suspect until we can definitely say they aren't."

"When was she killed?"

"I didn't say she was killed."

"Alright, when did she die?"

"A week ago yesterday."

"My wife and I haven't left the ranch since we came back from San Francisco. That was April sixth."

"And there's someone who can vouch for that?"

Roy came off his seat. "Now wait just a minute. I agreed to bring you out here to speak to the Cartwrights. If all you wanted to do was accuse them you and I coulda handled this in my office."

"Roy, it's alright. Officer Riley is just doing his job," said Adam.

Ming Lin brought in the coffee service, setting it on the table and preparing coffee for everyone before he left the room.

"Our foreman, our ranch hands and the Ponderosa ranch hands, and my father and brothers can all vouch for us. We haven't been doing much of anything but working since we got back."

"Ah, that's right. You're wife is a singer."

"Yes, well, I haven't been singing for the last month," said Shiloh. "I've been training horses and updating ledgers."

"Mrs. Cartwright, did you want Miss Peterson dead?"

"Well, you are direct, aren't you?" she said, waving Adam, who stood up fuming, back down in his chair. "Miss Peterson came here for one purpose, and that was to try and come between my husband and me. We weren't engaged at the time, and she almost did it. In fact, I was trying to sell my ranch and leave because of her when Adam proposed. But the thought of killing her never crossed my mind."

"Do you know anyone who might want to harm her?" Shiloh bowed her head into her hand and rubbed her forehead.

"Natalie was sent here by Will Stewart," explained Adam.

"Will Stewart…the new city attorney?"

Smiling, Adam leaned back in his chair and crossed his legs. "Yes."

Officer Riley leaned back as well. "There's obviously a story here."

Adam relayed his past with Will, and then added Shiloh's past, Will's visit to Virginia City, and his attempts to see her in San Francisco when she was performing. He told Riley what Natalie had done while she was in Virginia City and that Roy had put her on the stagecoach and sent her out of town, but that she stopped in San Francisco. "We didn't know Will had resigned his seat in the Senate and had come to San Francisco until the day of our wedding. We found out he was the city attorney at the mayor's banquet to celebrate the selection of plans for the new courthouse. You know the rest from the newspaper."

"When was the last time you saw Will Stewart?"

"The night before we left for home he sent a bottle of champagne to our table at dinner. We didn't see him. The maître d' told us, and I told him we didn't want it. We haven't seen or heard anything about him since."

"And what do you know about Mr. Stewart and Natalie Peterson?"

"He's known her as long as I have. She was always near him, even back when we were in Boston, and she accompanied him to the mayor's banquet. Beyond that, I only have my suspicions."

"Officer Riley, Will Stewart was using her to get to me," said Shiloh angrily. "If you want somewhere to look, you'd do well to start there."

"Mrs. Cartwright, we do know that she was residing at his home. We also know that he's rather distraught at her death."

"You should also know that he's a good actor," she snapped.

"You think he's capable of murder?"

She sighed heavily, looking over at Adam before she looked away. "He's capable of a lot of things. I'm not sure murder is one of them."

"Do you know why she might have wanted you dead?"

Shiloh started to speak, but hesitated, furrowing her brow. "I don't understand."

"We found a partially burned letter in the fire place at the Stewart residence. What was left of it said "Shiloh Cartwright/Isabella Whitney, $1,000 now…$1,000 after."

As Shiloh stared toward the coffee table with her jaw slack, Adam watched the color drain from her face. When she looked away, Adam answered, "Natalie appeared to be jealous of Shiloh. Will is obsessed with Shiloh, and ever since Boston, Natalie has tried to hold his attention."

"Do you know that for a fact, Mr. Cartwright?"

"I have no proof, if that's what you mean. Their behavior toward Shiloh pretty much spelled it out." As the policeman took notes, Adam got up and stood behind Shiloh's chair. "Officer, what were the circumstances of Natalie's death?" asked Adam.

"Her body was found floating underneath the docks at the wharf. At first we thought it was an accidental drowning, but the doctor we consulted said she was strangled. She had bruise marks around her neck the shape and size of a man's hand. We also have a witness who saw her having dinner that evening with Mr. Stewart, but he said he had to go back to his office, and she went home alone."

"Why would she have gone to the docks?" asked Shiloh. "She was gullible where Will was concerned, but she wasn't stupid. I don't think she would have gone to the docks by herself at any time."

"We don't think so either, Mrs. Cartwright. That's why we're investigating it as a murder."

Officer Riley stood. "Mr. and Mrs. Cartwright, thank you for your time." The men stood and walked toward the front door.

"Oh, Adam, I almost forgot," said Roy, pulling something out of his pocket. "Cecil brought these telegrams by when he found out I was comin' this way."

"Thanks, Roy." Adam looked at the envelopes. "Wait for just a minute," he said, opening an envelope from Jim Fischer. It contained only one sentence. _Will Stewart left San Francisco two nights ago for parts unknown._

Adam drew his mouth into a tight line and handed the telegram to Officer Riley. "I'll bet you a week's pay he's on his way here."


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

Daniel Slater sat at his own dining room table, enjoying his dinner. He had moved out of the house where he and his brother, Robert, had been raised, leaving it to Robert and his wife, Evelyn who had just found out she was expecting a child. Ever since Adam Cartwright came into the partnership, Robert had become intolerable, expecting him to take on more work to build the company, but Daniel preferred the current state of his life. He had enough income to make himself comfortable.

He smiled at the thought of the demise of the Cartwrights who had become San Francisco's darlings despite the fact that they didn't live there. Will Stewart had played his hand, walking the lovely Miss Peterson to the docks one evening, then disappearing under the guise that he needed some time away to mourn after hearing of her death. Stewart had booked passage for two to Europe before he left, listing his traveling companion as Miss Peterson.

Now, Daniel was going to make it easy for him. He had paid a handsome price to a man who would do his job and fade into the background, and with Adam Cartwright frequently riding alone on his huge expanse of land, no one would be the wiser. After all, the Cartwrights had all sorts of enemies. Daniel knew Robert thought of him as one of those enemies, but Daniel was making sure he was seen all over San Francisco.

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Waiting for Adam in the parlor while he saw their guests to the door, Shiloh sorted through the sheet music she had so unceremoniously dumped onto the floor. Once that was done, she paced in front of the fireplace and was so engrossed in her thoughts she didn't hear him enter the room.

"Shiloh?"

She stopped pacing and turned, a wide array of emotions showing on her face. "Could he?" She followed him with her eyes as he walked to the liquor cabinet and poured a glass of brandy.

"Here," he said, handing her the glass. "Drink this."

"I don't want a drink. I want…I need answers. Do you think she had…completed her transaction?"

"No, I don't. I think Will found the letter, threw it in the fire, and then walked her to the docks."

"Adam, he'd have to be out of his mind. He's the city attorney. He has so much to lose."

"Obsession like that is a sickness, Sweetheart. With Will, the more you fight him, the stronger his need to have you. I think he killed her because she was trying to kill you."

Sinking down into the chair, she looked quite lost. The thought that anyone would want to kill her… "What am I supposed to do?" she said, her voice fading to a whisper.

"You're not supposed to do anything," he answered, kneeling in front of her. "You and I are going into town tomorrow. We're having lunch as we planned."

He stood and brought her up out of the chair, holding her face in his hands. "She can't hurt you. She's dead. And I have no intention of letting Will Stewart anywhere near you again."

She was looking him in the eye, but he knew her mind was somewhere else, that intricate web of pathways carrying a hundred thoughts of every possible bad outcome, only this time, he was afraid she might overload. He shook her gently. "Shiloh."

Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath. "May I have that brandy now," she asked as tears began to well in her eyes. Reaching behind her, he took the glass from the side table and handed it to her, watching her tilt her head back to drink it all at once. "Another, please."

He almost told her 'no,' but remembered many a time when he had belted several glasses of whiskey down to quiet the voices in his own head. This time he poured her a whiskey, and when she threw it back and handed him the glass, he studied her face, worried that the whiskey would rob her of her lucidity.

"If I had just stayed at home to become some man's wife, obliviously happy to whelp out children and spend my days cooking and cleaning with a baby forever on my hip until I was old and used up…" She took the glass from his hands, stepped around him and went to pour another whiskey which she once again threw back. This time she swayed, and when she moved to catch herself on the cabinet, the glass dropped from her hand, shattering on the floor.

Hearing the noise, Ming Lin appeared. "I'm sorry, Ming Ling. Mrs. Cartwright isn't feeling well."

"Please do not apologize, Mr. Cartwright. I will clean the spill up at once," he said, retreating to get a broom and cloth.

Shiloh hadn't noticed Ming Lin reenter the room. "No one would ever have known anything about me and everyone would have been better off." She looked pitifully back at Adam. "And he wouldn't be hell-bent on destroying you."

Adam sucked in a breath when he saw the deeply tormented look on her face. She began to sag as the whiskey took hold of her, and he caught her, lifting her into his arms. "Ming Lin, would you mind locking up? We won't be back down tonight."

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Adam watched her as she slept fitfully, knowing that if not for the whiskey, she'd be wide awake. Her head tossed from side to side occasionally as her hands clenched the sheets. Sometimes she mumbled. Whatever she was doing, the tormented look on her face never left. He finally surrounded her with his arms, holding her against him as he held her hands, and when she fought him, his whispers in her ear seemed to calm her for a time.

Hours later, Adam drifted off with her when she finally succumbed to a deeper sleep. His plans to let her sleep in were extended until she woke up at eight.

Still holding her tightly against him, Adam awoke when she stirred. He relaxed his grip on her hands. "How are you?"

"I must not have slept very well," she answered quietly. "I feel as tired as if I stayed up and worked."

"You did work…in a way. Apparently you were working through the news about Natalie and Will." When she moved to her back, he opened his arms, and when she had settled back against him, he held her again.

"What do you mean?"

"You tossed and turned…and talked most of the night."

She closed her eyes. "I'm sorry. I kept you up, didn't I?"

Nodding, he answered, "For a little while. But you settled down. We've slept a little later than I planned, but it's alright. You needed the rest."

"Adam, what do you think Will's going to do?"

He sighed. "Nothing would surprise me at this point. I'm putting two men on you until we know." He brushed her hair back away from her face, and softly touched her lips with his. "I love you, Shiloh. I won't let anything happen to you." When she looked up at him, he saw complete trust in her eyes, and he kissed her like he had when he married her with all the emotion in his heart.

She pressed her cheek against his and whispered in his ear, "I love you, too; more than anything." She moved back and looked him in the eye. "I even love your prickly whiskers," she said as she rubbed her cheek.

Withdrawing his arms from around her, he turned and sat up, reaching into a drawer of the night table on his side of the bed and pulling out a clean under garment. "I will take care of my prickly whiskers then."

She did the same, and when she pulled on fresh drawers and camisole, she went to the closet to pick out her clothes for the day. "We're getting supplies today, aren't we?"

"We might as well while we're in town. Hoss said we have some packages waiting that we'd need the buckboard for, so we'll pick those up, too." He pulled his pants up, leaving them unfastened so he could tuck his shirt in after he shaved. Turning, he looked Shiloh up and down. "What are you doing?"

She looked at him guardedly. "I'm dressing?"

"Oh no. I'm not taking you into a nice restaurant in your britches."

"But don't we have to load a wagon?"

"No, _we_ do not. There will be no more loading wagons for you." She crossed her arms insolently, and he gave her an amused look. "I'm making no slight regarding your ability to load a wagon, Shiloh, but there are some things you're just going to have to let me do."

"And what am I going to be doing while you load the wagon?"

"Shopping, reading the mail, sitting on the seat, looking beautiful…" he winked. "All those things that ladies of the house do." She opened her mouth to object, but he cut her off, raising his eyebrows and a finger. "Uh uh uh. You have a husband, and even though I know the thought of letting a man do anything for you goes against some of things you were taught in New York, you knew what you were getting into when you married me. It's called compromise, young lady, and it's time you learned. Besides, there's no denying, Sweetheart, that you are a woman," he said, letting his eyes rove over her, flaring his nostrils and wearing a lascivious smile.

She suddenly felt quite exposed, and held her blouse up in front of her; an action that made Adam laugh. He pulled a clean, red shirt out of their closet, and standing behind her, bent and kissed her neck. "I have seen you naked." She spun around with her eyes wide, and took a step back, but he stepped forward with her and cupped her chin in his hand, stealing a kiss. "I promise I won't tell anyone," he whispered secretively, moving his eyes from side to side with a pleased look on his face that made her giggle. "Now, get dressed. I'll be downstairs removing my prickly whiskers." She cocked her head and smiled coquettishly as she watched him leave the room with a smile on his face.

When she arrived in the kitchen, he was just walking in from the bath house cleanly shaven. Pulling her chair out for her, he motioned for her to be seated, then took the seat next to her. He could see she was in a better mood than she had been last night, and hoped she had forgotten about Will and Natalie for the moment and could enjoy her day. Little did he know that Officer Riley had already been asking questions in town…questions that would have everyone in Virginia City talking.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven**

When the buckboard rolled in to town, Adam and Shiloh didn't notice people stopping to watch at first. But as they got closer to Mr. Cass's store, Adam saw Shiloh's hand search for his, and when he looked at her, she was looking around them, having noticed they were being observed closely.

Shifting the reins to one hand, he grasped Shiloh's hand and squeezed. "Sweetheart?"

"Adam, everyone is watching us."

Adam looked to the sidewalk on either side of town. A group of men had walked out of the saloon carrying their mugs of beer, while pockets of women gathered here and there, whispering back and forth to each other.

When they passed Cass's store, Shiloh turned back to Adam. "Where are you going?"

"Roy's office."

After he stopped the buckboard, Adam reached up for Shiloh and set her down on the street next to him, then took her hand and led her up the steps in front of the sheriff's office. He knocked on the door and opened it, finding Roy sitting at his desk.

"Adam, Mrs. Cartwright, what brings you here?" asked Roy, standing.

"Roy, is that police officer from San Francisco still here?" asked Adam.

"He is. He's leavin' on the noon stage today."

"Did he talk to anyone while he was here besides us?"

"As a matter of fact, he did. He spoke to the ladies that were at the dress shop the day Miss Peterson and Mrs. Cartwright fought."

Shaking her head, Shiloh looked downward in disgust. "The head of the Virginia City Gossip Society."

"Somethin' wrong Adam?"

Leading Shiloh back to the door, Adam looked back at Roy. "Nothing you can do anything about, Roy." He tipped his hat on the way out the door. Once Shiloh was back up on the seat of the buckboard, Adam climbed up and turned the buckboard back toward Cass's store. "Shiloh, if you don't want to stay, we can get the supplies and go home."

She smiled and patted his leg. "It's alright, Adam. People are going to talk about me every time my name appears in the newspaper because of my performances. I may as well get used to it. Maybe we could talk to Sam Clemens. If he'd write the story, Virginia City could hear it from us instead of Mrs. Gable, who I'm sure only got bits and pieces from Officer Riley."

Adam winked and pulled back on the reins, stopping the buckboard in front of the store. "We'll give Mr. Cass our order, then walk down to the _Enterprise_."

Will Cass saw the buckboard pull in front of the store, but waited behind his counter until the Cartwrights came in. "Mr. Cartwright, Mrs. Cartwright, what can I do for you today?"

"Will, why the formality?" asked Adam.

Cass dropped his eyes to the counter, nervously shuffling his order book. "That business about Miss Peterson. The whole town has heard that Mrs. Cartwright was accused of killing her."

"Now Will, you know better than to listen to gossip, and that's all it is. My wife was at the ranch when Miss Peterson was killed."

"That's not all, Adam. There's this business about the senator."

Glaring, Adam asked, "What about the senator?"

Cass pulled a San Francisco newspaper from under the counter, handing it to Adam. While Adam read, Shiloh stood back wearing a troubled frown. When he raised his head and looked out in front of him, Shiloh slipped the paper out of his hand, walking to the far side of the store to read. _Scandal…love triangle…power struggle…reputation of an actress…._

Adam watched her shoulders slowly slump as she read the article. "Will, surely you know none of that is true," he said in a low voice.

"Well, she was involved with him."

"She ended that courtship before she left Boston. She was with me then entire time we were in San Francisco, and if there is a power struggle, Stewart is fighting himself." Adam turned to collect Shiloh and leave, but turned back around. "And she's not an actress. She sings." He took the newspaper from Shiloh, laying it on a counter, then took her elbow and guided her to the door. "We'll be back in a few hours to load the wagon."

Once outside, Adam laid her hand on his arm and walked her toward the _Territorial Enterprise _office. Walking close to his side, she remained a half step behind him until he pulled her forward. "You've got nothing to be ashamed of, Shiloh. Hold your head up. If you shy away from them, they'll think you have something to hide."

"I don't think I've ever felt so humiliated."

Adam stopped and faced her, sticking his thumbs in his gun belt. "Shiloh, where's the determination you've always had to prove people wrong? This is no different."

Avoiding his eyes, she said, "As much as I try, it's not getting any better. People are just too willing to believe the worst."

He raised his hands to the sides of her face and kissed her forehead. "There will always be people like that. And they'll be quicker to believe anything that's written now that your name is Cartwright. There are people who don't like us. The only person you have to answer to is you."

"And what about you?"

"I know the truth about you. That's why I fell in love with you," he said, giving her a loving smile. "Now, let's go talk to Sam, and then we'll have a lunch at the club."

Taking a deep breath, she nodded and walked with her head high to the _Enterprise _offices where Sam was waiting for them at the door. "I heard you were in town and thought you might pay a visit to, uh, set things straight." Holding out his hand, he said, "Adam, how are you?"

"I'm well, Sam," he responded, taking Sam's hand.

"And you, Mrs. Cartwright?"

"Sam, that sounds so stodgy coming out of your mouth. I'd like to think we're friends."

"That's fine by me, if it's alright with your husband," he said, looking back at Adam, who snorted and smiled.

"And do I understand that you're Mark now?"

"To you, dear lady, it's still Sam as it is with all my close friends. The rest of the world can call me Mark. Why don't you two step into my office and tell me everything? We'll put a halt to the gossip."

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Mort Williams stood back in the shadows of the alley that had become his favorite place to watch Virginia City go about its day. Barrels and crates sat the entrance, hiding his presence, and it was easy to get comfortable while avoiding curious eyes. Setting himself up across from the International House, he watched as Will Stewart arrived, wearing pinstriped black trousers, white shirt, black vest and gray hat; a departure from the suit that screamed senator or city attorney. He rode in on horseback, wearing a gun, and not a soul recognized him. The ruse was completed by his registration at the hotel as David Reynolds.

Will Stewart wasn't the only stranger in town that had escaped everyone's scrutiny. This stranger was sitting on a chair outside the Sazerac, watching every move the Cartwrights made.

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Seated in an alcove of the club, Adam watched Shiloh as he ordered their lunch. "You seem to feel a little better," he said after the waiter left the table.

Looking around at the people there, she said, "You find out who your friends are when you're a public figure, don't you? Only, I didn't start with as many friends as you."

"You're not going to go all the way back to your school days, are you? That's ancient history. Look around. These people are under scrutiny all the time. There are people in town who resent them, and though some of them might deserve it, they don't let it ruin their day."

"Are you saying I shouldn't care what people think of me?"

"No, I'm not saying that at all. What I am saying is that you can't win everyone over. There will always be someone who doesn't like you, either for your fame, your money, your talent…"

"Or that I stole Adam Cartwright right from under their noses," she said, grinning.

Grinning back, he said, "I had to belong to someone before you could steal me, and I assure you, I did not."

Shiloh placed her napkin on her lap and twirled the glass of wine that had just been poured for her. "Adam, what would you say if I said I wanted to stop performing?"

He had just taken a sip of wine, then set the glass back on the table and leaned back, considering her. "That's the second time you've brought that up since we've been home. Sweetheart, don't you want to give it a chance?"

"It would seem that the worst part of my reputation comes from that. Doesn't that bother you; that your wife is seen that way? Doesn't that embarrass you?"

Leaning forward, he took her hand. "Not in the least. I know what was written in the newspaper isn't true. And a Cartwright doesn't bend to everyone else's whim. If you quit, it has to be because you don't enjoy it any longer…not because some faceless people don't like you."

After the waiter delivered their food, Shiloh studied her plate and said, "Adam?" He looked up with eyebrows raised. "I was telling you that I wanted to teach another person to train horses."

"Mm hm."

"I'm going to teach Tommy," she said, glancing up.

Adam stopped in mid-chew, put his fork on his plate, and wiped his mouth. "Tom Baker?"

"Johnny said he did very well while we were away, and he took it upon himself to take care of the horses in the south pasture while Johnny was at the Ponderosa. He said Tommy had a way with the horses…that he was very gentle with them. He's done everything that's been asked of him and more." She looked hopefully at him, but he was still frowning. "Adam, he took a bullet for us."

"Aren't you afraid that anyone outside the family you teach might venture out on their own?"

"We could have him sign a contract that he won't do that…or share it with anyone else."

"And you think that would stop him?"

"I don't think that he would, but even if he did, we'd have legal recourse. Besides, I don't have any illusions that someone else won't figure this out eventually. I'm counting on our reputation to sustain us."

"I'll think about it."

She twisted her mouth. "I'm not asking permission. The horses are mine."

He sighed and said, "Eat your lunch," then leaned forward to finish his.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve**

After lunch, Shiloh and Adam walked to the post office where several large boxes were waiting with the rest of the mail. "We'll have to bring the buckboard back to pick up these boxes," said Adam as he mailed off work that was ready for Robert Slater to check while Shiloh sorted through the mail they had received.

She turned back toward Cass's store with the mail while Adam stood watching her go. He crooked his jaw, knowing she was still miffed at him, then hurried to catch up, taking her hand as he reached her side. "You know I'm just watching out for you."

The way she let her head drop back slightly and continued to look ahead made him think she was going to refuse to talk, but when they got to the buckboard, she took his hands in hers when he reached for her waist to help her onto the seat. He knew the look on her face meant she was thinking carefully about her next words, so he waited quietly. "I would like to discuss this at home, but you're making me feel…helpless. I know the risks I'm taking, Adam. I understand your need to take care of me, but I think you're being…" She winced. "Too protective." She watched his nostrils flare and waited for his shoulders and chest to rise from the deep breath he always took when he felt he was being challenged. Glancing up at him, she bit her lip.

He looked over her head. "Do you want to wait on the buckboard or on the chair in front of the store?"

Turning toward the wagon, she answered, "Buckboard. We have to go back to the post office for those boxes before you load, don't we?"

"We do," he said, lifting her by her waist as she pulled herself up into the seat.

The short trip to the post office was chilly even though the sun was shining on what was turning out to be a pleasantly warm day. When Adam stopped the buckboard, Shiloh grabbed his hand as he turned to leave, gently rubbing her thumb over the back and down his fingers. "I didn't mean to upset you. I was just trying to tell you…"

Dropping his head, he pursed his lips, and then looked back at her. He took her hand and brought it to his lips. "We'll talk at home. I'll be right back."

The boxes had been left just inside the door of the post office, so Adam felt Shiloh was safe on the seat of the buckboard. He didn't notice three horsemen slowly riding toward them, and he jumped down from the buckboard and pushed open the post office door. The three men stopped next to the wagon, and the man closest to Shiloh tipped his hat. "Mrs. Cartwright."

Looking at each of the three faces, she asked just as Adam came out of the post office carrying a box, "Do I know you?" Adam put the box on the back of the buckboard, and while his gun was hidden from the riders, he removed the leather strap from the hammer.

"No ma'am. We haven't met. Have a nice day." The men rode on, stopping in front of the Bucket of Blood.

Adam watched them until they disappeared through the batwing doors, and then reached up to Shiloh, taking her arm. "Wait inside the post office. I'll be right back."

"What are you going to do?" she asked, looking from the saloon back to Adam.

Leaning down and kissing her, he ushered her through the door. "I'm just going to have a friendly conversation." He closed the door behind her, and walked down to the Bucket of Blood, pausing at the batwing doors to look over the interior of the saloon. Two of the men were seated at a table while the third man stood at the bar, talking to one of the girls. He pushed through the swinging doors, and walked over to the table. "Gentlemen. I'm Adam…"

"We know who you are, Cartwright."

"And just how do you know my wife?"

Snorting, the man said, "Everyone knows your wife, Cartwright. She's famous in these parts."

"I haven't seen you around town. Are you staying or passing through?"

The second of the two men moved his hand to his gun and started to stand, but the man who was doing the talking put a hand on his arm and shook his head after watching Sam, the bartender pull a shotgun from under the bar.

"Don't know yet. We're trying our hand at a little mining not too far out of town. We're just here to wet our throats," he said, slowly standing with his thumbs stuck into his gun belt. "You can't blame a man for noticing a pretty girl, can you?"

"Good luck with the mining," said Adam coldly. "And while you're here, stay away from my wife." Tipping his hat to Sam, he turned and walked out of the saloon.

The man who had been at the bar sat down at the table. "You just gonna let him go?"

"For now. Ain't no reason to upset the whole town. We don't want anyone to start askin' questions."

Shiloh had been pacing just inside the door of the post office when Adam pushed it open. "Is everything alright?" she asked anxiously.

He smiled and answered as if nothing had happened. "Everything's fine. You stay right here while I finish loading these boxes." When he finished, he helped her back up onto the seat of the buckboard, then drove back to Cass's store. Looking at her with a sweetly conniving smile, he asked, "Why don't you sit on the chair down here out of the sun?"

"Actually, Adam, I prefer to sit here. There's a breeze, and I'm afraid I'll be chilly in the shade."

"But, Sweetheart, you don't have your bonnet," he said, wearing the same smile, but adding raised eyebrows.

She laughed. "You can see me just fine through the window, and I promise if anyone tries to kidnap me, I'll scream at the top of my lungs before I poke him in the eye."

He scowled and waved his head back and forth, then spun and went into the store. Will Cass had everything stacked neatly in front of the window. He had already moved the bags of grain, corn, potatoes and onions out in front of the store. While Adam loaded, Shiloh read her mail. She had a letter from Annie and one from Edwin, and she read those first. The third letter only had her name and the ranch on the outside of the envelope, but she recognized the handwriting. She left it sealed and put it at the bottom of the pile. Turning on the seat, she watched as Adam hefted a box and placed it on the back of the wagon.

"Are you sure I can't help you?"

He had turned back toward the store, and stopped, slowly pivoting on his heel. "I'm sure," he said, smiling.

"Adam, who were those men that you followed to the saloon?"

"They're new in town. They said they were miners," he answered as he hefted a bag onto his shoulder.

"Miners? Do the miners around here usually wear guns?"

With his back to her, he tightened his lips into a line and furrowed his brow, wishing she had forgotten about those men. He bent to lift another bag. "Some of them do." He knew they weren't miners. They were more likely hired guns, but he wasn't going to tell her that. In fact, he was going to do his best to change the subject. "Was that a letter from Edwin I saw?"

"Yes. I got a letter from Annie, too."

"How's Annie?" he said, adjusting the load for another box.

"She said she's enjoying her classes. She's doing some things she wasn't allowed to do with the doctor she worked for, but she was able to watch, and that's making it all much easier. There are only eight women in her class, so they all get opportunities to do the work."

"Edwin?"

"He didn't say so, but he misses Mollie terribly. He's trying to occupy his and Edwina's time, and he talked about things they used to do with Mollie. He has an apartment near the theatre, and he's hired a woman to help take care of Edwina."

Laying the last bag on the wagon, he said, "I'll pay for this, and then we can head home."

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Will Stewart noticed Shiloh sitting on the seat of the buckboard at the post office. He watched Adam load the packages, and then drive to one of the town's stores. He walked to the livery, looking like every other working man on the streets of Virginia City. Saddling his horse, he rode out of town unnoticed and waited a little ways down the road for the Cartwrights to ride by.

While he was waiting, hidden behind some brush growing up out of boulders, another man rode by and pulled his horse up, then guided it up a steep embankment another forty feet down the road. Standing on a high boulder, he held a rifle and watched in the direction he had come. When Will heard the wagon, he saw the other man duck down into the rocks. The rifle barrel was still visible and was following the buckboard.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen**

Mort Williams had followed Will Stewart out of town and had seen the man with the rifle as well. He gambled that Stewart would do nothing with the Cartwrights together, knowing that he was no match for Adam's gun. Riding out behind the man with the rifle, he went a distance he knew would be enough to distract the hidden man, but close enough for Adam to become wary. He fired two shots into the air, then rode ahead to be sure the Cartwrights continued safely on their way.

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Adam and Shiloh heard gun shots and looked, but rather than stopping, Adam flicked the reins to send the horses into a trot. "Hold on."

"Adam, that was some distance away," said Shiloh loudly to be heard over the noise of the horses and wagon. "It was probably someone hunting."

With his jaw set, he answered, "I'm not taking any chances. We're an easy target below these boulders." He drove the horses until they came into a wide clearing on a hill with an unobstructed view all around them. Pulling the reins, he stopped the horses and stood, pulling his gun from his holster and slowly turning all the way around. His squint from the sunlight seemed to soften his tensed features, but Shiloh knew he was on high alert.

She sighed, and bowed her head, crossing her hands in her lap. Turning to step down off the buckboard, he stopped and looked at her. "Shiloh?"

She answered without looking back at him. "Will I ever be able to go anywhere without you believing someone is out to harm me?"

He continued down off the wagon and to the back, and began readjusting the load. When he climbed back up on the seat, he turned to her. "As long as Will Stewart is close, and until we find out who's following you, I'm not taking any chances with your life." Taking her face in his hands, he moved close, almost nose to nose. "I could never forgive myself if I allowed Will Stewart to get to you…to hurt you." Pressing his lips to hers, he pulled her into him.

When she opened her eyes, her eyes met his and saw the love she understood, but there was something else in his eyes she didn't comprehend. She moved her hand to his face. "Adam?"

He kissed her again, lingering before he said, "I need to get you home." Taking her hand, he wrapped her arm around his, and then drove down the road toward the Flying W.

When they arrived, Ming Lin came out of the kitchen and began unloading the kitchen supplies. Johnny and Billy took the bags of grain into the barn, and Adam took the packages into the parlor.

"Shiloh!"

Hurrying from the kitchen, she stepped into the parlor. "You don't have to yell."

"How are you going to hear me in the kitchen if I don't yell?" he asked, setting three of the packages on the floor in front of the sofa.

"Well, you could come and get me."

"Come over here," he said, sitting on the sofa and patting the cushion next to him. When she was seated next to him, he put his arm around her. "The rest of this day is going to be better, I promise. Now, open your birthday presents."

"You bought me birthday presents?" she asked, looking at the boxes. "When did you have time?"

"I bought them while we were in San Francisco."

"Adam, I haven't celebrated my birthday since…." Her mouth moved, but she didn't say the rest. She looked away.

Drawing her closer, he whispered in her ear, "I know, Sweetheart. Now, why don't you open these?"

Sitting on the edge of the sofa, she slowly removed the lid of the first box, and brushing the straw away that had been used as packing, she picked up a dinner plate with the pattern she had admired during their first walk in San Francisco. Looking back at him with a wide grin, she moved the lid off the second box, finding the crystal she had seen in the same shop, and moving finally to the last smaller box, she lifted an interior box into her lap. "Silver." The silver service was engraved with a 'C' surrounded by roses. Leaning into him, she smiled demurely, turning her face up to his and sharing a tender kiss. "They're wonderful, Adam. You watched me."

"Hm…one of my favorite pastimes. A new bride needs new china, crystal and silver to go with her new house. I know some of your mother's china is missing or chipped, and I don't think you have a full set of silver. And speaking of houses, I've hired a crew, so as soon as I can measure out the foundation, work on the house will begin. While I'm doing that, those men are going to remove that window," he said, pointing to the biggest window in the parlor, "and move your piano in."

She threw her arms around his neck. "Oh, Adam, I've missed my piano. I won't have to disturb your father anymore."

"I'm not sure he's going to be happy. He mentioned he was getting used to the music in the house, at least when you were playing and not writing."

She giggled and shrugged. "Yes, well, when I'm writing, it's hit and miss…literally. Adam, can we ride over to your land? I'd like to see it."

His head cocked, and his face took on a mildly unsettled look. "It's our land," he said quietly. "It's our house. Shiloh, all this," he said, waving his hand around him, "and everything we acquire in the future is ours, not mine. I know the legal question has been on your mind, especially since we signed that first contract in Sacramento, but that's not how I feel."

"I know all this is ours. But, Adam…the Ponderosa belongs to your father. What he gave to you is a piece of something he worked so hard for. It will always belong to the Cartwrights."

He looked away for a moment, and then looked back in disbelief. "What is your last name?"

"Well…it's…"

"It's Cartwright."

"Adam, I don't have the blood and sweat that built the Ponderosa running through my veins."

Standing, Adam walked to the fireplace and spun around. "Pa's dream was to find a place to raise his sons; a place to leave us and our families. You, Shiloh, are my family." He stood with his hands on his hips, looking down at the floor. "How can you think that way about the Ponderosa when you're so willing to call this…" he raised his hand and glanced up, "…ours."

She looked at her hands on her lap, smiled and took a deep breath before she rose from the sofa and walked to him, placing her hands at his sides. "My father moved here for Micah and me; to get us away from what he knew was coming in the South. As he predicted, there is a war raging there. And though he did it for us, what he thought about this ranch…all this was supposed to be Micah's; not mine. I was supposed to be taken care of by someone else because I was the daughter. When Micah died, Daddy didn't really do much with the ranch, other than to keep it going to sustain us. His love was his horses. I think he expected me to sell it. The Ponderosa is much bigger than this, Adam, and I don't mean in size. It's the name. It's the legacy." She stepped into him and gazed into his eyes. "It's your legacy."

"What good is a legacy, if I can't share it with the woman I love?"

Her eyes smiled as she looked into his. "I've told you before…I'll follow you to the ends of the earth. But Adam, the Ponderosa is in your blood, and it will be in the blood of our children. And I'm not saying that it won't be a wonderful place to raise them with you, but it will never be a living, breathing part of me like it is for you."

"Then what is the Flying W?"

"I told you…it's Micah's."

"Shiloh…Micah is dead," he said softly.

Smiling sweetly up at him, she said, "I have looked into my brother's eyes, Adam. He will be back, and when he comes, the Flying W will be his as my father meant it to be. Now, can we go look at the land where you're building the house?"

She tiptoed and kissed his chin, then walked past him out of the parlor. He didn't move other than to turn his head to watch her go. His jaw was crooked, and he looked back toward the cold fireplace as if to find an answer to the question running repeatedly through his mind; a question he didn't want to put into words; a question of his wife's sanity.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

Adam pulled the buggy underneath trees at the top of a hill. On one side was a view of the lake, its shores trailing out in both directions from them and covered by a tall, stately alpine forest. Straight across the blue expanse that seemed to go on forever, one could just make out the tops of the mountains far off on the other side. If not for those mountains reaching up from the blue, a person seeing the vastness of the water for the first time might think they had reached the ocean.

On the other side of the hill was a field of high grass, its green flowing down from their position like a river, spreading over miles and miles of fertile land dotted with black and live oak.

"We'll build the house here," said Adam. "The back will face the lake. The front will look out over the pastures, and the road will come up from the left the way we came up. We'll build the horse barn and riding corrals down there," he said, pointing. "These cattle are ours. I started building my own herd after we got back from your performance in San Francisco."

Stepping on something hard, Shiloh looked down. Below her feet were the remnants of a stump. "Adam, this land has been cleared. Was this part of the forest?"

"I've spent the better part of the last year clearing these fields and planting pasture grass."

The corner of her mouth curled up. "After we got back from San Francisco?"

"I knew how I felt even then," he said, drawing her into him. Bending down to her, he whispered, "I was just waiting for you." They kissed, and then looked back at each other's eyes. His hands moved down the sides of her back and over and around her hips where he pulled her against him. Anywhere else, his next kiss might have been seen as indecent, but here alone, she was his to kiss as he pleased, and by the way she pressed into him, he knew she was not going to object. Taking her hand, he led her to a shaded area underneath the boughs of two huge oaks where the sun filtered through and the hay was waist high. Their wide grins soon changed to salacious hunger as they slowly disappeared into the grass.

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Lying on his side propped up on an elbow, he broke a straw from above their heads, and stuck one end in his mouth. She was lying on her back with her arms at her sides, eyes closed, lips parted, her hair spread out above her shoulders; the picture of peaceful bliss.

Pulling another straw, he drew the seeded end from her forehead, down her nose, across her lips, and when her eyes opened, watching him, he continued down her neck and between her breasts to her navel where he stopped and circled.

"You didn't check your calendar."

"That would have been exceedingly difficult to do since it's at home on the night table."

"Aren't you worried?"

She reached up and took the straw from his mouth, transferring it to hers. Then she took the straw he was using to tickle her stomach and turned it on him, making circlets in his chest hair.

Grabbing the straw, he threw it over her and pulled her to her side and up against him. "You didn't answer me."

"Did you notice a difference?" she asked, running her finger down his nose and into the cleft of his chin, after which she kissed it.

"Mm hm. You weren't worried, and because you weren't worried, I wasn't. It was like our first night in Santa Cruz. But what does that mean?" he asked with creased eyebrows.

"It means I'm not going to worry about it anymore. I miss you. I miss the way we were in Santa Cruz and on the beach."

He wrapped his fingers around the back of her neck while he stroked her cheek with his thumb. "Are you sure you're ready?"

"I have Hoss trained to the point that he can carry the horse business forward with some guidance. In another two months, I can have Tommy trained, and I'll still have time to get all my performance contracts completed." She moved her hand behind his head and grabbed a handful of his hair, pulling herself so close she was touching her nose to his. Her lips brushed his. "I may not be."

He smiled and touched her lips. "You may be." He looked into her eyes, and seeing the twinkle there, he wrapped his arms around her, covering her lips with his. When they rolled back onto the ground, they were laughing.

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Mort Williams was comfortable among the graves at the top of the hill. It had been a long time since Shiloh had been up to see them. Before her engagement, she came up and spoke to them regularly, but since, she hadn't been up there once. The rhododendron had grown into a nice hedge that blocked the view of the base of the tree from the house. It was here that he sat and leaned with his ankles crossed, waiting for them to return.

Stewart had turned back toward town after the gun shots had stirred Adam into moving the buckboard quickly down the road. The other man had followed them to the ranch and watched them enter the house. He stayed only a few minutes before he left, but he didn't head in the direction of town. He headed further up into the mountains.

For now, Williams was happy right where he was. The Cartwrights headed onto Ponderosa land in the opposite direction from the man with the rifle, and he was sure they were going to the land that Adam's father had set aside for him. He'd wait for them to return and stay until he was sure they were in for the night. Then he'd make his way to the hayloft in the barn to get a little sleep before he went back to his post at the top of the hill before the ranch hands began to stir; about the time the lamp was turned up in the window of their bedroom.

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Shiloh and Adam sat in the buggy underneath a blanket, waiting for the sun to dip below the mountain range across the lake to the west. The yellows and oranges slowly changed to pink as the sun slowly disappeared, and the haze in front of the mountains to the edges of the lake turned slate blue, both colors reflecting off the still water. The trees and boulders in the foreground stood as sentinels, shadowed in black against the pale pink and blue of the sky and the lake.

Adam had driven the buggy down the hill to a spot above the shore of the lake where he planned to build a small summerhouse for picnics and fishing with their children.

Snuggling into his side under his arm, Shiloh glanced happily up to his face. "It's almost mystical, isn't it? I half expect to see a sea monster glide by."

He chuckled. "On this very spot, I'm going to build you a summerhouse so you can sit out of the sun and enjoy the view."

"Is this part of the land your father gave you?"

"It is. Right down below these rocks is a small beach with boulders that go a hundred feet into the water."

"I'd love to see it."

He leaned down to kiss her. "Not today. We don't have enough light left. In fact, we need to head for home." Pulling his arm from around her, they both sat up straight on the seat. Adam picked up the reins, and they were on their way back to the Flying W.

After a quiet ride, they pulled into the yard, and Billy came out of the bunkhouse to take care of the buggy. "Thank you, Billy," said Adam as he gently lowered Shiloh's feet to the ground.

Ming Lin met them at the door to tell them that dinner was ready, and when they went into the dining room, the lamps had been dimmed and two candles had been placed on the table and lit. Her new china, crystal and silver graced the lace tablecloth, and a chocolate cake sat in the center. Roses from the Ponderosa garden had been arranged around the candlesticks. Shiloh smiled, cutting her eyes back toward Adam, who guided her to her seat at the table. When he was seated, Ming Lin served them chicken pot pie from the sideboard, and when he excused himself, Adam took her hand.

"Happy Birthday, Sweetheart."

"Chicken pot pie?" she asked, grinning.

"That's your favorite, isn't it?"

"How would you know that?"

"It's the only thing Hop Sing ever made that you had seconds."

After dinner when they retired to their room, Shiloh sat on the side of the bed, flipping through the calendar book she had made when they returned from their honeymoon. Adam slipped underneath the covers behind her and leaned over, looking over her shoulder. She smiled at him and handed him the book which he immediately tossed to the floor next to his boots before he took her hand and pulled her down onto the bed.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen**

"Mornin' Mrs. Cartwright," said Hank as he removed his hat and sat it on the chair next to her. He reached for the coffee pot and poured himself a cup.

"Good morning, Hank. Have you had breakfast?"

"Yes, ma'am." Pulling a piece of paper from his shirt pocket, he slid it across the table. "Here's the cattle count from the round-up. We're all finished."

Shiloh looked at the piece of paper and smiled. "That many more? Any losses?"

"A few, but not as many as I thought with the rough winter we had."

"Hank," said Adam as he walked into the kitchen with his hand extended. Shiloh poured a cup of coffee and sat it next to Adam's plate. When he sat down, she handed him the piece of paper. "You're kidding."

"No, sir. We only lost about twenty head. The boys watched 'em like hawks."

"I'll want to run some of the heifers up to our property on the Ponderosa. I've brought in some Longhorns and Herefords from Texas to fill out the herd. So don't let anyone go. We'll be able to use some men over there."

"The men will sure be happy to hear that, Mr. Cartwright, but I was hoping to use the extra men to finish up the repairs. Here's a list," said Hank, pushing another piece of paper over to Adam who picked it up and laid it on the table between him and Shiloh. "The sheds we repaired last year held up real good, but we've got a whole line of fence down on the east side, and the dam at Soldier Creek is about to give."

Shiloh pointed to an item on the list. "The bridge over the wash?"

"Yes ma'am, one of the main timbers is split. It gave a bit when we ran the chuck wagon over it. I don't think it'll hold up much longer."

Nodding, Adam said, "I'll ride out and take a look. We can cut a new cross-timber up at the logging camp, but if we have to replace any of the cross boards, we'll have to buy them at the mill in town. We can't use our mill while we're milling the square sets."

Before Adam finished his sentence, they all heard a loud explosion that brought them all to their feet and to the front porch. "That came from up near the rim," said Hank. "Close to the place we found that body while you were in San Francisco. There's nothing up there to blast."

Shiloh turned to Adam. "You don't suppose that's where the ore Sam King had assayed came from, do you?"

Adam pursed his lips, then stepped back inside the door and came back out with his hat and gun belt. He turned to kiss Shiloh, and was stopped cold by the look on her face. "You're not going."

She turned into the house, and he narrowed his eyes, thinking that was too easy, but turned and went to the barn anyway, hoping she wasn't going to come back out. When she hurried into the barn, wearing her hat and carrying a rifle and a box of ammunition, he stepped in front of her, grabbing the barrel of the rifle. He pulled, and she pulled back. "Shiloh, there's no need for you to go. We might not find anything."

"Then you shouldn't have a problem with me going." He wasn't expecting the jerk that pulled the rifle out of his hand at the same time she side-stepped around him toward her horse. She leaned the rifle against a stall wall, and began to saddle Spirit. Standing at her elbow, he glared at her over her shoulder, but she ignored him. "Adam, I'm almost ready to leave. You should finish saddling Sport." She heard him take a slow, deep breath, and braced herself for whatever physical assertion he was about to use.

He grabbed her forearm and spun her around, squeezing tightly. She refused to wince or look away, and for a moment they shared angry stares. Adam eased his grip on her arm, but still held it, and let out a slow, quiet breath. "I don't want you to go," he said calmly. "If there's shooting…"

She wasn't calmed by his attempt to win her over. "I have been running out to deal with trouble since I came home from Boston," she spat. "And if there's shooting, _you_ might get hurt. That works both ways. Now unless you're going to tie me to a post or a chair, I suggest you get your horse saddled, because I'm ready to go."

Flaring his nostrils, he walked away and finished saddling Sport, then walked Sport out of the barn. She was on her way out with Spirit when he came back in the barn, grabbed her hand, and pulled her out without her horse, calling for the two men who had been tasked to watch out for her. "Jake, go in the barn and unsaddle her horse. Mike, stand here at the door and don't let her in. Then both of you stay out here in the yard and don't let her leave under any circumstances."

While he was giving orders to the men, she stood back and gasped loudly, glaring up at him with her jaw set and an inferno in her eyes like he'd never seen. He leaned over her. "I'll deal with you when I get back." He turned away from her, and stepped up into the stirrup and before he was settled in his saddle, Sport was galloping away with Hank close behind.

Mort Williams was on his knees behind the shrubs on the top of the hill, snickering. Shiloh had always had an explosive temper. He thought she had been taught to control it at college; he hadn't seen it since she'd been home…until now. He watched her storm to the front door of the house, and he cringed, closing his eyes, remembering the last time years ago when she had stomped through that door and slammed it. He didn't have to open his eyes to know that she had shattered the glass for the second time in her life. He could hear it. Moving back to his place against the tree, he chuckled to himself at the thought of Adam dealing with the full onslaught of Shiloh's temper. He knew Adam had seen her fury at its worst, but he'd never had to deal with it…until now.

Shiloh stood between the study and the parlor, head down and fists clenched. She heard Ming Lin moving behind her, sweeping glass out of the floor, but she paid him no mind. At the moment, she was too furious to think straight, and she knew it, so she took several deep breaths and stormed into the kitchen to retrieve the papers Hank had given them earlier. Ming Lin had a fresh pot of coffee prepared, so she poured a cup and went to the study. She pulled the ledger out of the desk drawer and laid it on the desk in front of her, but still, she wasn't ready to open it. Taking her cup of coffee from the desk, she sat back in the chair, and replayed the scene in the barn over and over in her mind.

How many times had she run out of the house with her rifle and ridden out onto the ranch expecting trouble? How many times had she driven the wagon to town and loaded it? How many days had she gone without wearing a dress or a skirt because she ran a ranch?

He'd said before that she knew what she was getting into when she married him, and that she had to learn to compromise. This wasn't compromise. This was giving up everything having to do with the ranch. He knew what he was getting when he married her, but it seemed he expected her to change.

_Change. _

She had just brought her coffee cup up to her lips, but stopped and held it there.

_Change. _

He was trying to change her. Was she trying to change him? And what was that look she saw in his eyes every time he felt she might be in some kind of danger; that look she could never figure out? She knew she couldn't answer these questions on her own. She would have to wait until he got back. Sitting the coffee cup back down on the desk, she sat forward and opened the ledger.

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Hank and Adam came to a stop when the trail reached the rim. "Mr. Cartwright, there's an awful lot of ground to cover up here."

"Let's start where you found that body."

"It's up a ways," said Hank, moving on up the trail.

When they arrived at the spot where the men had found the body, Adam dismounted and walked around.

"I came back up and looked around the area, but there was no sign of any diggins," said Hank.

Adam nodded, and continued to look, walking across the rim. He had walked maybe half a mile before he stopped and looked down off the ridge. "Hank, what do you make of that?" he asked, pointing.

"Rock piles? It ain't natural, that's for sure."

They tied the horses, and slowly made their way down the steep slope. When they got closer, they drew their guns and ducked behind boulders, watching for movement, and seeing none, they inched closer until they could see into what looked like the beginnings of a shaft; a shallow hole high enough for a man to stand in cut into the side of the ridge.

Squatting down, Adam studied the shaft, reaching up to dislodge a piece of rock and handing it back to Hank. "Hank, have you ever seen silver ore?"

"No sir. I never tried my hand at minin'."

"Well, now you have."

Stepping further into the hole, Adam took the knife from his pocket and opened it, using it to scrape dirt from around a vein of quartz jutting out of the back of the shaft. Digging the blade into the dirt, he managed to coax another rock out, and handed it to Hank.

"What do you see?"

"Is that gold?"

"It is," answered Adam as he gathered several more rocks from around his feet. "Bring the horses down. I'm going to take some samples to the assay office in town."

When Hank returned, Adam emptied the contents of a saddlebag into the other, and placed the rocks he had gathered into the emptied one. Just as he was about to mount up, they heard another blast at what seemed like a short distance away.

"Where's the border of the Flying W up here?" asked Adam.

"It's just on the other side of the ridge."

They walked the horses back up the ridge, and when they made the top, they tied the horses behind an outcropping of rock and crouching low, made their way to a ledge that looked down on the other side. There they saw several men loading rocks into satchels.

Adam looked back in the direction they had come up, and then turned to Hank. "About where do you think the property line is?" he said in a low voice.

"We're just about on it," said Hank. "That area they're blasting seems to line up with the shaft on the other side."

"It does, doesn't it? They've only got one problem. From the looks of the strata in the rocks over here, they run parallel to the ridge which probably puts those veins deeper onto Flying W property. The owner of the property on this side of the ridge could run a shaft right under us and we might never have known it. I'll bet whoever owns that land is connected to the person who tried to sell the Flying W out from under Shiloh."

"So they file a claim on the land on the other side of the ridge and tunnel underneath."

"Yep. It looks like those men are leaving. We'll wait and get some samples from their side. I'll take both samples into town, and while I'm there, I'll find out who our neighbor is." When the men left, Adam and Hank scrambled down the ridge to the blast hole, collected some rocks, the climbed back up to their horses.

As the two men rode back toward the ranch house, Adam thought about the men he'd seen at the blast site. He knew he'd seen them before. Then he remembered. They were the three men from the saloon he had warned to stay away from Shiloh. "Hank, I'll take the saddle bags. You go on back to the ranch. I'll be back in a few hours."

Hank hesitated, then raised his eyebrows and nodded.

Taking a deep breath, Adam faced him. "If you've got something to say, just say it."

"Mr. Cartwright, I love that little girl like she was my own." He lowered his head. "We both know she's got a temper, and more times than not, it flares because someone's tellin' her she can't do somethin.'" Looking back up, he finished. "She's always made sense. She's done a good job with the ranch."

Hank turned his horse back toward the ranch while Adam thoughtfully watched him go, then headed to town.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen**

Shiloh had heard the second blast and ran out to the front porch, looking in the direction of the rim. Then she looked at the barn where Jake was sitting in front of the door. In the other direction Mike was looking out over the herd of horses. Adam had told them not to let her leave. She couldn't go to the Ponderosa to play her piano. She couldn't go out to the corral to work with the horses. Closing her eyes, she fought the rage she felt rising, and turned back into the house.

She headed for the kitchen for another cup of coffee, but stopped. She had already drank a full pot of coffee this morning. She spun on her heels toward the parlor where she poured a glass of brandy, taking it to the study and digging back into the ledgers.

Hank rode into the yard, looked over at Jake and Mike while he tied his horse, then walked to the house and knocked.

"Hank, you're back?"

"Yes ma'am. Mr. Cartwright rode on to town."

"Oh. Come in. Would you like some coffee?"

"No thank you, Mrs. Cartwright. I just wanted to let you know I was back."

"Hank, please stop calling me Mrs. Cartwright."

"But, ma'am, you're a married woman now, and…well…it's what's done."

"Hank, I'm still Shiloh. I'm the same person I was before I was married," _though one person in particular seems to have a problem with that. _She shook the thought away. "You have more right to address me the way you always have than anyone else. I've known you all my life and you were here long before Adam was. Now, I insist."

With a wide smile, Hank said, "Yes ma'am, Miss Shiloh. Now will you take some advice from an old man who's known you all your life?" She twisted her mouth, but nodded. "His heart's in the right place. Don't yell at 'im. Talk to 'im."

"Is that it?"

"Yes'm." Leaning in, he removed his hat and kissed her cheek. "Now, I've got work to do. Oh, and I'll have one of the boys come by and board up the door until we can get some more glass." He hadn't even asked about the door. He knew.

Smiling, she stood in the doorway and watched him leave. She missed Annie. When she was young, Hank had been the one that listened, but since college…since she had become a woman, it had been Annie who listened. Now Annie was clear across the country and Hank…Hank's loyalties were now split. She could never…would never ask him to take sides.

She finished updating the ledger, and then turned to the shelves of books behind the desk, running her finger over the spines until she stopped at _Paradise Lost. _Adam kept a copy of the book upstairs on the night table. This copy belonged to her mother, and when she pulled it off the shelf, she blew a cloud of dust off the top of the pages. She'd read it in college. She had read most of the books in her mother's library. Still, she took it into the parlor, curled her legs up underneath her in the big chair, and turned to the first page.

Adam was tying Sport to the hitching rail when Roy Coffee walked by. He stopped, smiling. "Adam, didn't expect to see you again so soon. What brings you back to town?"

"Oh, just a little business."

Looking at the sweat on Sport's chest, and then the hole in the saddle bag slung over Adam's shoulder, he asked, "Everything alright?"

"Someone took a shot at me on the way into town."

"Did you see who it was?"

"No, I was out in the open, so I didn't stay."

"Adam, now I know there's been some talk about that senator fella…"

"Roy, I doubt it was Will Stewart. Even if he had anything to do with it, he would have paid someone else to take the shot."

"I guess there's no point in writin' a report. But you be careful goin' home, you hear."

Adam tipped his hat. "Roy," he said, turning and walking across the street to the assay office carrying both sets of saddlebags.

"Mr. Cartwright," greeted the assay clerk. "Ore from the Ponderosa?"

"Nope. This is sample number 1," said Adam, dumping the rocks he had gathered from the Flying W side of the ridge into a bucket. "This is sample number 2." He dumped the other saddlebag from the other side of the ridge into another bucket. "And do me a favor. Don't let anyone know your testing ore samples for me."

"Sure thing, Mr. Cartwright."

"Oh, and can you get it done today?"

"Well, Mr. Cartwright, I got several samples in front of you."

"Were you here when Sam King brought his ore in?"

The clerk nodded. "I did the assay."

"So you know how rich that ore was." The clerk nodded. "Take a look at this ore. Does it look like the ore King brought in?" The clerk picked up several pieces, and as he turned them over his eyes widened. "If you'll do my assay first, all these rocks are yours. All I want is the report."

"I'll get right on it, Mr. Cartwright."

"I'll be over at the Silver Dollar," said Adam, heading out the door.

"Mrs. Cartwright?"

Shiloh looked up from her book and smiled. "Yes, Ming Lin."

"Should I begin dinner preparations?"

Looking up at the mantle clock, then out the window, she answered. "Give it one more hour, then start."

"Yes, Mrs. Cartwright," he said, bowing, and leaving the parlor. In another few minutes, Ming Lin was back with a cup of coffee, setting it on the table next to Shiloh's chair, and slipping out as quietly as he had entered.

She took a sip, and returned to her reading.

Adam had gotten his assay report and headed home at dusk, hoping to avoid being easily seen. He took the road to the Ponderosa, and then turned toward the Flying W. Johnny came out of the bunkhouse when Adam entered the yard and took his horse. Stopping on the front porch, Adam examined the boards nailed to the door. They hadn't been there when he left, but he was sure he knew what had happened. He removed his hat and gun belt, leaving them on the entry table, then quietly walked further into the house, first looking in the study, then the parlor.

Shiloh's head lay on the wing of the chair she occupied, the book she had been reading open on her lap. He gently picked it up and turned it around, then snorted, closed it and set it on the table. Squatting in front of her, he touched her hand, and when she opened her eyes and raised her head, her nostrils flared. She closed her eyes again, taking a deep breath, mentally catching up to the present. Adam watched her shoulders relax and the tight line of her lips soften before she reopened her eyes. Still, she said nothing.

Ming Lin entered the parlor so quietly neither of them heard him. "Mr. and Mrs. Cartwright, dinner is ready."

"Thank you, Ming Lin," said Shiloh. Adam held his hand out to her. She looked at it, but stood up on her own and walked to the dining room. Raising his eyebrows and sighing, Adam followed. They ate dinner in silence.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen**

When Shiloh finished her dinner, she excused herself from the table and went back to the parlor. Wiping his mouth with his napkin, Adam followed her into the room, and closed the doors behind him, watching her walk to the window and turn. He walked towards her, meeting her eyes, and as he neared her, she moved to the back side of the sofa, keeping it between them.

"You act like you don't trust me."

"At the moment, I don't."

"How could you think I'd hurt you?"

"Oh, I know you won't physically hurt me, but you will try to seduce forgiveness out of me."

He smiled. "I didn't know I needed to be forgiven." Turning, he went to the chair next to the fireplace and sat down, crossing his legs, and clasping his hands in his lap. "You obviously have something to say. I'm listening."

"I don't know what you expected from me when we were married, but what you appear to be expecting of me now is not…." Her hands slowly clenched as she spoke. She opened them and spread her fingers wide, then flexed them. "I don't appreciate being imprisoned in my own home on nothing more that your word."

"Imprisoned?"

"You told Jake and Mike that I was not to leave the yard under any circumstances. I couldn't go to the Ponderosa to play my piano. I couldn't even go to the corral to work with the horses. I could do nothing today, but work on the ledger."

He twisted his mouth into a pucker. "You're right. I apologize. But that's not what's really bothering you."

"Ever since I came home from college, I've been dealing with all the problems on this ranch. I can't tell you how many times I've ridden out with Hank, carrying my rifle."

"There's no need for you to do that now."

"In your opinion?"

"Yes, in my opinion."

"Well, I don't share your opinion."

Adam set both feet on the floor and leaned forward. "What man is going to invite his wife into the middle of a gunfight?"

"Did you have a gunfight today, Adam?"

"No, but considering the assay that Sam King had done, and the fact that someone had been trying to sell the ranch, it was likely."

Raising her hands to her face, she closed her eyes and rubbed her temples, and while her eyes were closed, Adam stood and walked toward her. Hearing his boots on the floor, her eyes flew open. "Don't," she said, jabbing her finger toward him. "You're being too protective."

"Shiloh, do you see any other husbands allowing their wives to go chasing after explosions with a rifle?"

"No, I don't. But I'm not like those women, and you know that. I dealt with all these kinds of problems before we were married. I don't expect to have to stop now that we are." She leaned forward over the sofa. "You didn't have a problem with it before. Why do you have a problem now?"

He moved a hand to his hip and pinched the bridge of his nose with the other. "I thought you'd be happy with your horses and your music."

"I am. But I don't want to be excluded from the ranch business. I really don't mind you doing what you do, Adam, but I resent being ordered to stay out of it. You didn't ask me. You dictated." She breathed and leaned back. "You treat me like I have nothing to offer; like I couldn't possibly contribute or have an idea that might help." She leaned against the back of the sofa and crossed her arms. "You made me feel that way in town when you wouldn't let me help load the wagon. And you know, I can understand that having your wife load the wagon might embarrass you. But you did this today in front of Hank and the men. You made me feel like some frail, helpless…" She turned away from him, and he quietly made his way around the sofa. When she felt his hands on her shoulders, she spun around. "Don't touch me!" Her hand went up to her mouth as soon as the words slipped out, and her eyes saddened. Stepping forward, she laid her hand on his chest, seeing the hurt in his eyes. "I didn't mean that."

He let out a deep breath and dropped his hands to his sides. "Yes, you did."

She stepped closer, moving her other hand to his chest. "Adam, you weren't this overbearing before. What changed?" Looking into his eyes, she saw again something there besides the love, something she couldn't read…almost like fear, but this was Adam Cartwright, a man known to be unafraid. She touched his face. "Adam, what is it?"

Taking her hand away from his face, he answered quietly, "There was no reason for you to go today. It was not my intention to keep you from your work. I'll be clearer next time."

She took several steps back. "Will you at least tell me what you found?" she asked flatly.

He chewed the inside of his cheek and cocked his head. "Not tonight." Turning, he left the room and climbed the stairs.

Shiloh watched him until he entered the bedroom, then walked around the sofa and fell back on it, closing her eyes. _What is it he's not telling me?_

Several hours had passed when Adam came back down the stairs and into the parlor, expecting to find Shiloh where he'd left her. She wasn't there. She wasn't in the study or the kitchen. Walking to the front door, he noticed her jacket was gone from the coat tree next to the door. He stepped out onto the front porch and looked toward the barn. It was dark, but he went inside anyway. Her horse was there. Walking back out into the yard, he looked around, and then glanced up the hill.

When he got to the top, he didn't see her at first. She was sitting in the moon shadow of her father's headstone. "Is he dispensing any wisdom tonight?"

"No. Mama isn't either."

"It's late. Would you come back to the house?"

She took several moments to move. When she stood, he stepped back out of her path and followed her down the hill and into the house. He stopped at the bottom of the stairs when she started up. "Are you coming up?"

"No," he said, smiling. "I'm going to work for awhile."

She started back down. "Adam…"

"I think we both need to sleep on it. We'll talk tomorrow." He turned and walked into the study, leaving her standing on the stairs, watching him go.

Adam sat at the desk, reading specifications for a building in Salt Lake that Robert Slater had sent. He had already read through them twice and was about to start for the third time when he finally laid the document down and leaned back in the chair, rubbing the bridge of his nose. He was tired…no, he was weary. He had so much work to do he was just staying ahead, and now this business with Shiloh had to be dealt with. He'd known all along about her temper. He also knew there were times that she strained to keep it under control, but in all cases before, she had managed. Even now, she was trying, but it seemed that this had been building since they had gotten home from San Francisco.

He had no doubt she could handle normal ranch business. She had already proven that over and over again. But blasting usually meant mining, and when it came to a strike, men became greedy animals willing to kill anyone who came between them and riches.

She'd lost those she loved. Why couldn't she understand his loss?

He took the stack of mail and wandered into the kitchen to put a pot of coffee on the stove. Sitting at the kitchen table, waiting for the coffee, he began to flip through the mail. On top were the letters from Annie and Edwin. Under those two was a letter to Isabella Whitney that hadn't been opened. The handwriting was familiar, but he didn't immediately place it. He continued on through the mail until he came upon another envelope from Slater. Opening it, he found the first payment for the plans for the courthouse, with the legal documents that always accompanied a staggered payment signed by the city attorney, Will Stewart. He sat staring at the signature before he pulled the envelope addressed to Isabella out of the pile. Why was Will Stewart sending Shiloh a letter, and why didn't she open it?

Shiloh heard a creak and turned in the bed to watch the bedroom door. She expected it to open, but after a few minutes, she realized it was only the sounds of the old house she had heard. Looking at the clock on the night table, she got up and pulled her robe on. She had been laying there for almost two hours, waiting for Adam to come up.

She padded in bare feet down the stairs, stopping at the study, and then continuing into the kitchen, entering so quietly, he didn't hear her until she moved to the cupboard and took two cups down. She brought the coffee pot to the table and poured them both a cup. "I see you found the rest of the mail."

He sat looking at the envelope. "Why didn't you open it?"

"I just didn't want to deal with it at the time. I thought I'd open it later, but then I forgot about it. I really have no interest in anything he has to say, but if you do, please, help yourself."

Adam tore the end of the envelope and pulled out the letter. When he finished reading it, he passed it to Shiloh. "You need to read this."

_My Dearest Isabella,_

_I am sure you have already heard of the tragic news of Natalie's death. Poor girl. She was smitten with me, and I just did not have the heart to turn her out. She knew that my heart would always be yours, and apparently she could not live with that knowledge any longer. I will be taking a short break to decide what I shall do, whether to stay in the city or travel for awhile. I have made some good investments and can afford to take the time away._

_It would mean a great deal to me to discuss my plans with you. You have always had the ability to help me think clearly. I need you now to help with this decision. Please considering coming to San Francisco. I will endeavor to make your stay comfortable._

_Adoringly yours,_

_William Stewart, Esq._

Shiloh held her head in her hand. "He's quite mad."

"He left San Francisco almost a week ago."

She looked up. "How do you know that?"

"I asked Jim Fischer to let me know if either he or Natalie left the city. Roy brought a wire with him when he brought Officer Riley out."

"Were you going to tell me?"

Adam smiled and took a sip of coffee. "You weren't in any shape to hear it at the time."

"Adam, this has to end. All of it. This is no way to live." She raised her cup to her mouth and sipped. "Is there anything else you haven't told me?"

Puckering his mouth, Adam thought that maybe she should hear it all. Maybe then she would understand why he wanted her at the ranch house where he could keep her safe.

"Hank and I discovered where Sam King found the ore he had assayed. It's from the ridge on the north property line. There was a short shaft on the Flying W side, but the blasts came from the other side of the ridge. The three men I followed to the saloon when we were in town were there loading rock to be assayed. I took some samples from our side, and we waited for the other men to leave and took some rocks from the other side. That's what took so long in town; I waited for the assay. There's gold and silver on our side as rich as the report from King's assay. There's nothing on the other side of the ridge."

"Who owns the property on the other side?"

"Hearst, Haggin and Tevis. Sometime after we got back from San Francisco, someone took samples from our side and had them assayed, claiming they were from the other side. So rather than continuing to try to sell the ranch out from under you, I think they were planning to tunnel underneath the ridge to the back side of the vein. They thought they could get away with it because I said we had no plans to mine it."

"George Hearst always struck me as an honest man."

"He probably hasn't even been there."

"I can't believe he would have bought into a mine without checking it out for himself."

"Sweetheart, there is no mine…yet. He made the decision based on the assay. That's not all. On the way into town, someone took a shot at me."

Shiloh sat her coffee cup down with a thud hard enough to slosh coffee onto the table. She swallowed hard before she spoke. "Did they see you on the ridge?"

"I don't think it was them. If there had been three of them, I wouldn't have gotten away so easily."

"Could it have been Will? If he killed Natalie, he's certainly capable."

Leaning forward and taking her hand, he said, "Shiloh, that's exactly why I want you to stay near the ranch. I don't know where Will is. I don't know where this other man is who's been following you. I don't know who the three men from the saloon are working for, and I have no idea who took a shot at me. On top of all that, this is the busiest work year we've ever had. I can't be with you all the time. The safest place for you to be is here."

Drawing her hand away, she sat back in her chair and bowed her head. "I'm not very good at being confined."

"You're not being confined. You can still work with your horses, and you can still go to the Ponderosa, though the men will be here tomorrow to take out the window, and I'd like you to be available to them if they have any questions. I'll be up at the timber camp in the morning, and then I need to go by the mill to check on the square sets. After that, I want to go measure the bridge and see what we need for that repair. I'll go by the dam tomorrow. And sometime in the next month or so, I need to go check the foundation at the courthouse in San Francisco." Bending his head down, he tried to catch her eyes. "I want you to go with me." She looked up at him, then away. "Shiloh, what is it?"

"What about town? I could at least help by getting the supplies. I can drive the buckboard. Maybe I should have learned how to do those timber bids." Adam smiled. "Isn't there anything I can do at the camp? There's payroll, and there's the schedules and the counting. I could do the paperwork."

Tilting his head, his mouth opened in sudden realization that all she really wanted was to help. But he'd left her alone with her horses and her music. She was feeling isolated. "Shiloh, when would you have time? Your music takes up your mornings, and your horses take up your afternoon. What plans do you already have?"

"I'll have horses ready for some of Jim's friends within the next month, and I still need to arrange some music for my performances in Sacramento in August. There are still some things I need to work on with Hoss…ground manners and gait. And I need to start teaching Tommy. And I need to start working with Satan." Adam's nostrils flared, but she wasn't looking. "Adam, I don't want you to think of these as my hobbies. If they don't contribute in some way to the Flying W the same as the cattle and timber, then I should be doing something else."

"I've seen what you bring in for your horses, Shiloh. And I know what you get paid for singing. The horses alone carried the Flying W the first year you were back."

"You haven't even mentioned the Ponderosa. You still have responsibilities there."

"Pa's coming over tomorrow evening. He wanted to talk about some Ponderosa business. Why don't we ask Hoss and Joe, too? We'll have dinner here, you can talk to Hoss about the horses, and we can make sure all the work is covered for both ranches."

She nodded. "What are we going to do about the ridge? We need to have a presence up there to prevent someone from stealing that ore."

"I'll send a wire to Jim and ask him to set up a subsidiary of the Flying W for the mine. We'll have to come up with a name. I'll also send a wire to Hearst and let him know what we've found. He'll probably want to come out and take a look at the land he's purchased. It would be interesting to find out just how he purchased it…directly or through a merchant banker."

"Why would that make a difference?"

"If it was through a merchant banker, the individual who initiated the sale could be hiding behind several layers of investment companies. It would be harder to find out who that person was. I'd bet that person is the same one who tried to sell the ranch. But Shiloh, we'll need money to start a mine, and we're stretched with the extra payroll for the timber camp until we get paid for some of these contracts. I'll have to arrange for a loan."

"How much money will we need?"

"Well, we'll have to buy mining equipment, ore cars, explosives, build a headstock and hire some men. Once we get some ore out, it'll start paying for itself. We'll need…oh…around twenty thousand to carry us until the ore starts paying."

"We have money in the other account."

Adam slowly sat up straight. He hadn't thought about the account he had set up for her performance money. "I thought we agreed that money was yours."

"No, you said that. I never agreed it was mine. I'd prefer we invest it back into the ranch. That's what I intended to use it for before I married you." Adam leaned forward, listening. "Right now it has five thousand in it. I have another bank draft to deposit from the first half of my performance contract in Sacramento. That's another twenty-five hundred. And I'll be getting the same for the first half of the other two performance contracts, so that will be another five thousand. I'm expecting those any day. Once those performances are done, we'll have another seventy-five hundred. That doesn't count what I'll get for the horses. There's the money you'll need to start the mine."

Adam rose from the table and walked to her, holding out his hand. She took it this time and let him pull her up into his arms. "I don't ever want you to think that you don't contribute to his ranch, Sweetheart. Do you realize what we'll save if we don't have to take out any loans?"

She cut her eyes up to his, and smiled impishly. "Yes, I do."

He grinned back. "You learned that at college, did you?" She snorted. He put his arm around her shoulders and walked her out of the kitchen. "We can still get a few hours of sleep," he said, walking her up the stairs.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen**

Hoss rode into the yard just as Adam was saying goodbye to Shiloh. She yawned.

"You could get some more sleep," said Adam, chuckling.

"I would have been fine if you hadn't been so…insistent." She wrinkled her nose and smiled.

"You could've said no."

"I did…sort of," she snickered.

Bending to kiss her, he replied, "It doesn't count when you're laughing." He cupped her chin in his hand and kissed her again, then stepped off the porch.

"Mornin', Older Brother. Where you headed off to?"

"Lumber camp, mill, bridge," said Adam, continuing on to the barn.

"Wait a minute. What bridge?"

Adam yelled over his shoulder. "The bridge over the wash."

"Shiloh, I'll be right back," said Hoss. He turned and followed Adam into the barn. "What's wrong with the bridge? I rode over that bridge yesterday."

"Hank said one of the main timbers is split."

"Come to think of it, it was might squeaky."

"I may need to go to town this afternoon for some new cross boards. Are you going to be around?"

"I will if you need me."

Adam walked Sport out of the barn and mounted. "What else do you have to do today?"

"There's a couple of wagons I need to fix. Pa's back from hiring some fellas to take the logs for the dock to Sacramento. I reckon he wanted to talk to you about that. But I was supposed to take over at the timber camp for you today."

"I'll leave Shorty in charge. Pa's coming over tonight. You and Joe should come, too. We'll have dinner here."

"When I get finished here, I'll get back to the Ponderosa and take care of them wagons and let Pa and Joe know about dinner. I'll get back here as soon as I can."

Adam smiled. "Don't forget to tell Hop Sing."

"Yeah, I reckon I oughta do that," said Hoss, chuckling.

Adam rode out, waving back at Shiloh as several men rode in. "Mrs. Cartwright," said one of the men who stepped down off his horse and approached the porch. "I'm Jim Tyler," he said, tipping his hat. "Mr. Cartwright hired us to help move your piano. If you'll show me which window needs to come out, we'll get to work." When Hoss came up beside them, Jim turned and held out his hand. "Hoss."

"Jim, ain't seen you in a while. What you been up to?"

"There's lots of carpentry work in Virginia City. The town's growing."

"It is at that."

"Jim, if you'll come this way, I'll show you the window," said Shiloh, smiling, and feeling more comfortable, knowing that Hoss knew the men.

After furniture was moved out of the way, Shiloh left Jim and his men to do their work while she and Hoss went to the corral. "Hoss, what do you think about Tommy learning to train?"

Hoss leaned against the corral fence. "That boy is as comfortable around the horses as you and me. I ain't got nothin' against it, but have you talked to Adam? He don't cotton to the boy."

"I told Adam what I was planning to do."

"Well, as long as he don't have a problem…I think Tom'll do real good."

"I'm going to have him do more to help, but I'll have to wait until I can get a contract for him to sign to really start, so don't say anything to him."

Hoss nodded. "Wha' d'you want me to do today?"

"We're going to work on ground manners, and then we're going to saddle the horse. After that, I'm going to teach you how to train the gait. And once that's done, Hoss, you will have trained your first horse. Then it's exercises so he remembers."

Shiloh asked Tommy to watch while they worked on Hoss's horse. "Hoss, don't let him crowd you. Make him keep his distance."

"How do I do that?"

"Stiff arm him. After a few walks around he corral, he'll get the idea."

After several productive hours, Hoss left to fix the wagons at the Ponderosa. Shiloh asked Tommy to groom the horse, and then move Satan to the training pen. When he hesitated, Shiloh studied him.

"Tommy, if you've got something to say, say it. You don't have to be afraid to talk to me as long as you're honest."

"Well, Mrs. Cartwright, it's that horse…Satan. I'd just hate to see you get hurt. I mean, I've seen you work with some ornery animals, but he's…well, I understand why your pa named him Satan."

"Tommy, I know Satan is mean. You don't need to be afraid to say it. He is. But if I can train that out of him, I can train any horse. And if I can't…well, I'll know that I can't train any horse. But I have to try to know."

Tommy looked away. "I just don't think it's worth maybe gettin' hurt bad."

She creased her brow and bit her lip. "I'll have a handler close by. If he acts up, I'll get out of the pen, and if he's too quick, the handler will…" Her expression suddenly changed to dismay. "Handle him."

"Mrs. Cartwright."

Jim Tyler was standing next to the house. She turned to Tommy and said, "Go ahead and do as I asked," then walked over to Jim.

"Mrs. Cartwright, we've taken out the window and left it leaning against the house," he said, pointing. "We covered the hole with some canvas. Adam wanted to be with us when we move the piano, so we'll have to wait for him. He knows where to find me."

"Thank you, Jim. I'll let Adam know."

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Adam ducked underneath the bridge at the wash, running his hand along the timber from one side of the bridge to the other. When he got to the middle, he felt the split; a wide, dangerous gap. Crawling out and walking across the bridge, the found that a number of the cross boards near the split were splintered as well. He'd need a load of four by eights to replace them, so he and Hoss would be taking that trip into town. He rolled several large rocks across the center of the bridge to warn off anyone who needed to cross. Since the bridge was on Flying W property, the only people using it would be ranch hands. There was only a foot of water running through the wash at the moment, so riding through shouldn't be a problem. His next stop was home to hitch the buckboard and wait for Hoss.

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Ben rode to the south corral and watched as Shiloh walked among her horses, offering them carrots. He tied Buck to the corral fence and walked over. "Shiloh."

"Pa, how are you?" she asked, wiping her hand on her britches and meeting him with a warm hug.

"I came over to ask you the same question?" he said, smiling.

"We're fine," she said with some reservation.

Ben creased his brows and looked down at her. "Something I can help you with?" She smiled and shook her head. "I can't help if you won't tell me."

Stopping, she pursed her lips. "I don't even know how to tell you what's bothering me. I think Adam is being too protective of me, and he…well, he is very protective of me. I used to run out when there was trouble on the ranch, and now he…he leaves me behind. I just don't understand what's changed. I went before we were married, but I can't go now?" She hesitated for a moment. "That's not really the problem. It's the way he looks at me when he thinks I'm in danger…I know he loves me, but there's something else there, and I don't know what it is."

Ben took a handful of carrots from her and turned to the gathering horses. "You say he's too protective of you." She nodded. "Just since you've been married." Biting her lip, she nodded again. "You know, before you two were married, he worried about you quite a bit. But you weren't really his to protect. Now you are. Shiloh, you know his mother died giving birth to him."

"Yes, I know."

"And you know that Hoss's mother was killed by Indians on the way out West." She nodded again. "Do you know how close he was to Inger?"

"No, not really. He hasn't said much about her."

"At the time, Inger was the only mother he had ever known. She was very easy to love, especially for a little boy. And then, there was Joe's mother, and though that took longer because he was older, he came to love her. Do you know about Ruth?"

"I've heard Joe mention Ruth."

"Adam asked Ruth to marry him." Holding her breath, she looked up at him wide-eyed. "This was, oh, almost two years before you came home from college. The Shoshone threatened to kill him if she didn't go with them. She left to save him."

"Didn't he look for her?"

Ben smiled. "No. If he had tried to take her, the Shoshone might have killed her." Ben held her forearms. "Shiloh, the women who meant the most to him…those he came to love deeply…he's lost them all. Except for you," he finished, touching her nose with a finger.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen**

When Adam arrived at the house, no one was there or in the yard, so he rode down to the south corral where he found his father and Shiloh talking in the pasture, walking among the horses. "Is this a private conversation?" he called as he walked over to them.

"Adam, how are you? I haven't seen much of you lately."

Smiling and taking his father's hand and arm, Adam answered, "Just busy. Hoss said you found some teamsters to haul the logs for the docks."

"They're finishing up a run of mine cars from San Francisco. They're looking for a load to carry back."

Adam looked around at the horses and raised a hand to his chest. "Well, we have two. We've got the first load of lumber for the railroad ties ready to go." Shiloh slid under his arm and looked lovingly up at him. Seeing the warmth in her eyes, he smiled. "Well, hello. Hoss and I are going to town. I have to buy some lumber for the bridge."

"That bad, huh?" she said.

"Mm hm. I need to send some wires anyway." He bent and kissed her.

"Why don't you two go on up to the house? I have some horses to halter. I'll be up in a minute."

Ben and Adam rode side by side toward the house. "Adam, I don't want to pry, but is everything alright?"

"We're fine, Pa. We're…adjusting."

When they arrived, Hoss was watching Satan in the training pen digging at the fence line, turning and rearing, obviously anxious about being confined.

"When did Satan go in the pen?" asked Adam with a frown.

"Oh, hey Adam. Pa. He wasn't there this mornin', so it musta been right after I left. He don't look too happy to be in there neither."

Adam's jaw muscle flexed. "He's not the only one." He turned his back on the horse and tapped Hoss on the chest with the back of his hand. "We need to go into town. That bridge could go at any time. Did you tell Joe we were having dinner here?"

"Yep. In fact, he should be here any minute. I mentioned we might have to go into town, and he wanted to go."

"Well, that makes all of us," said Ben. "I'm expecting a letter from Salt Lake. Looks like we'll be driving some cattle up there this year."

They watched Shiloh ride into the yard, leading four horses to the back corral. She handed them off to Johnny and Tommy, then rode back to the front of the house and tied her horse to the rail just as Joe rode in. "Well," she said, walking over to the training corral. "Are we having a party?"

Her smile left when she saw the frown on Adam's face. "Sweetheart, I don't like how agitated he is in the corral."

"Oh, he'll be agitated for awhile. He can't see any of the other horses from here." Stepping in the middle of the men and facing Adam, she patted his stomach. "Don't worry. I won't be going in the corral for several days…at least not until he calms down. And I'm going to town with you. If you'll wait for a few minutes, I'll change my clothes." She headed toward the house, and yelled back over her shoulder. "There's coffee in the house, gentlemen. And cookies."

"She don't have to tell me twice," said Hoss. The others shook their heads and followed.

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Ben and Adam waited by the fireplace while Hoss sat on the sofa eating cookies. "Adam," said Ben in a low voice. "I wish you'd reconsider allowing her to train that horse. Nothing good can come of it."

"Pa, I understand your concern. I share it."

Shiloh stood by the door of the parlor, wearing a skirt and blouse. "But I won the argument with a few concessions. Pa, I know why you don't want me to train Satan. But I watched what my father did. I've written it all down. There will be a handler watching me, and if Satan is too aggressive, I'll…" she lowered her head. "I'll geld him."

Ben looked back at Adam who shook his head. "It's the best I could do without starting a war."

"Horses are hitched," said Joe as he walked into the parlor. He bent down and took a cookie as everyone walked out.

Adam helped Shiloh up onto the seat of the buckboard. "Hoss, you drive. I'll be riding." He wasn't going to tell his father and brothers that someone had taken a shot at him. He wanted to be able to go after the shooter if he did decide to take another shot.

When they got to town, Hoss drove the buckboard to the mill. Shiloh waited on the wagon while Hoss and Adam ordered and paid for the lumber they needed, and while Hoss waited, Ben, Adam and Shiloh walked to the telegraph office. Ben walked on to the post office while Adam and Shiloh sent their telegrams. Shiloh looked at the message Adam was writing. "Is that going to Jim?"

"Mm hm."

"Can you add something for me?"

"Of course."

"Would you ask Jim to write up an agreement not to use my method of training outside employment by the Flying W or disclose it to anyone who isn't employed by the Flying W to work with the horses?"

Adam stopped writing and turned to her. "You're going ahead with Tom's training?"

"Yes, I am."

"Then do me a favor." She looked up at him. "Stop calling him Tommy. He's not a boy anymore. He's a man." She broke out in wide smile. "Don't be smiling just yet. If he slips up once, I'm going to fire him."

Her smile was instantly gone. "He's not yours to fire." She started to say more, but he raised an eyebrow. "That's not going to work this time."

He maintained his raised eyebrow and cocked his head. "We'll discuss it at home." Handing the first telegram to the clerk, he turned back to Shiloh and leaned on the counter. "I need to let Robert know when to expect us in San Francisco. When can we go?"

"I need to take some horses to San Francisco. Can we combine trips?"

Rubbing his chin, Adam thought about everything they needed to deliver in that direction. "If we can arrange to haul the dock logs and Crocker's timber at the same time, we can follow the teamsters to Sacramento. That way, Hoss can stay and supervise the cutting while I'm gone. But you said you were going to have foals by then?"

"Maybe, if we have to wait to go. If Joe or your father can help at the lumber camp, Hoss and my men can handle the foaling." Adam nodded and wrote out the telegram to Robert Slater. "Oh, before I forget, Jim Tyler finished removing the window. He's waiting on you to move the piano, and I need to go see Mrs. Riley. She ordered some staff paper, and I told her I'd buy half of it."

Adam finished a third telegram to George Hearst and paid for them, then walked Shiloh out the door. "I'll walk you over to the Riley's. I want you to wait for me there while I go talk to Jim." When they arrived, he stopped at the door. "Do not come looking for me. If Will Stewart is close by, I don't want him to find you alone." She twisted her mouth, and he placed his hands on her shoulders, looking at her affectionately. "Please."

Sighing, she nodded and smiled. "I'll wait."

Bending to kiss her, he said, "Thank you," and opened the door, closing it after she walked through. She grinned at him through the window, and he winked back before he walked across the street.

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Sheriff Coffee stood leaning on the side of the buckboard while Hoss loaded. "Hoss, I haven't seen you in town for awhile."

"We've been real busy, Roy."

"Well, Adam seems to get into town perty regular."

"Yeah, he's got a lot of irons in the fire, that's for sure."

"He must be handlin' it all alright then. I haven't heard of any trouble."

Hoss put another board on the wagon and stopped, smiling. "Yeah, I reckon he's been running all over the place keepin' everything goin.'"

"That Adam's turned out to be quite the manager."

Hoss grimaced. "I don't know about that. He's doing as much work as he is managin."

"Well, that's because I've got two ranches to keep up with," said Adam, walking up behind Roy and patting his shoulder.

Roy extended his hand, and Adam took it. "I hear you're a real busy man, Adam."

"Sheriff Coffee, Sheriff Coffee," yelled little Jeremy Polk.

Roy turned around just in time to catch the boy. "Now slow down, Jeremy. What's all the yellin' about?"

"It's Mr. Riley. Someone hit 'im on the head. I'm supposed to get you, and then go get the doctor."

"You run on and get the doctor, Jeremy. I'll go over to the Riley's right now." When Roy turned around, Adam was already half way down the street.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty**

Adam flew through the front door of the Riley's shop. He stopped to look around, and then ran behind the counter where Mrs. Riley was bent over her husband.

Kneeling on the other side, Adam checked Mr. Riley's head and looked up at Mrs. Riley. "Dr. Martin is on the way. Where's Shiloh?"

"Adam, he took her. Walter tried to stop him, but he hit him. And then Shiloh tried to fight him, and he hit her, too. Knocked her right out, and then carried her out the back." Roy and Hoss came through the door. "Hoss!" called Adam, motioning for Hoss to follow him out the back. They found tracks leading west away from the back of the shop down the alley. "Go find Pa and Joe and tell them what's happened."

Hoss nodded and ran around the building to the street with Adam. He watched Adam run for his horse at the mill, then took off in the direction of the post office. Joe had run out of the saloon when the yelling started. "Hoss, what's goin' on?"

"Someone took Shiloh out of the Riley's store. They rode west. Adam's already gone after 'em. I'm headin' over to the post office to find Pa." Joe didn't wait any longer. He was up on Cochise before Hoss had even started toward the post office, riding out of town at a breakneck gallop.

Adam knew if he rode hard, he'd be able to catch the buggy he was following. It wasn't long before he could see it up in the distance.

Shiloh was just coming to, and when she realized where she was, she starting swinging frantically at the man driving. She stood up when Will Stewart reached out to grab her, but he lost control of the buggy, hitting a rock on the side of the road. Shiloh turned and jumped.

Adam had seen her fighting and saw her jump. He pulled Sport up just as he was approaching, but before he could dismount, he fell forward off his horse, landing face down on the ground.

Shiloh heard the gunshot. Standing to run to him, she fell back down to her knees, grabbing her ankle. As she crawled toward Adam, Stewart caught up to her, carrying her kicking and flailing back to the buggy. He hit her again, stunning her, and drove away. He pulled the wagon to the edge of a clearing where he had a horse waiting to take them toward San Francisco. He knew he would never be able to escape in the buggy, but he would be able to stay hidden in the forest where the soft pine-matted ground would hide the tracks of a horse.

She fought him again, but this time when he hit her, she dodged and fell to the ground. When he bent to pull her up, she kicked at his knees, and when he went down, she continued to hit him until he flattened her on her back and straddled her, holding both of her hands above her head. "I'm taking you to Europe, Isabella. You've always wanted to see Europe."

"I'm not going anywhere with you," she spat.

"Isabella, Adam's dead. There's no reason for you to stay."

"You don't know that," she shouted as she struggled

He slapped her again, and when he bent down to kiss her, she bit his lip, opening a deep cut that poured blood. "You're going whether you like it or not," he growled and pulled out a knife, holding it to her neck.

She stopped fighting. "Will, don't do this. I don't want to go with you."

"Adam is dead, and no one is coming. We have all the time in the world." He lowered the knife to her blouse and began flipping the buttons off. Once the blouse was open, he stuck the knife between the bones of her corset, cutting the fabric. When she began to fight again, he let the tip of the knife score her skin. "You can go without a mark, or you can go a bloody mess. It's up to you."

He cut all the way to the top of her corset, then settled down on her, letting go of her hands and holding her head to kiss her again. Pushing against him as hard as she could, she clamped her mouth shut until he stopped, then continued to slam her fists into him. He beat back, knocking he wind out of her. He held her right hand above her and continued his attack, ripping and groping until she drew her fingernails down the side of his face. He yelled out, more in anger than pain, and taking her left hand, he moved it above her and jammed the knife into her palm, pushing it through and into the ground all the way to the hilt. She screamed in pain, and he slapped her until she stopped.

Barely conscious, she felt his hands move under her skirt. She reached for anything close to her right hand, and wrapping her fingers around a large rock, she brought it up, smashing it into the side of his head at the same time a blood-curdling scream escaped her throat.

Joe had brought Cochise to a sliding stop next to Adam, and jumping out of the saddle, he knelt at his brother's side, rolling him over on his back. "Adam, can you hear me?" he asked frantically, patting his brother's face. They both heard a terrified scream from somewhere up the road.

"Go, Joe," whispered Adam.

Ben had just arrived and knelt next to Joe. "I'll find her, Adam," said Joe, snarling and running toward the scream.

Will leaned to the side, holding his head, and when he regained his balance, he took the rock from her, holding it up over his head. "He'll not have you either then," he said, but when he moved to bring the rock down on her, another gun shot rang out. Will fell forward, covering her. It seemed like only a few seconds when she felt his weight lifted from her. Struggling to open her eyes, she could see a blurred face.

"Shy, someone is coming for you."

Fighting to focus, she squinted and whispered faintly. "Micah?"

"Listen to me. Don't tell anyone. Especially Adam. I'll find you. I'll explain it all. Just don't tell them." He moved to the far side of the clearing from where he had come, then slowly made his way down into a ravine as Joe entered the clearing with his gun drawn.

Looking around him as he made his way to Shiloh, Joe checked for a pulse at Stewart's neck, then holstered his gun and moved next to Shiloh, wincing at the knife buried in her hand. He checked for her pulse, and then yelled at the top of his lungs, "I found her."

He heard his father's voice call back. "Is she alright?"

"No," he yelled, and with tears in his eyes, he said to himself, "No, Adam, she's not alright."


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty-One**

"Son, can you hear me?" said Ben quietly.

"Shiloh."

"Joe's with her. Now let me take a look." Ben turned Adam on his side, tearing the shirt away from the bullet hole in the back of Adam's shoulder.

"We need to get you back to town," said Ben calmly as he pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket, folded it and pressed it against the wound to stem the bleeding. Turning Adam on his back, Ben said, "Now, you lie still. I'll go check on Shiloh."

Adam's eyes were closed, but he nodded, and Ben stood and ran in the direction of Joe's voice. "Joe!" he called.

"Over here, Pa."

When Ben entered the clearing, he sucked in a breath, falling to his knees next to Shiloh. "Dear God," he choked. Looking over at the body lying behind Joe, he asked "Who is he?"

"It's Stewart. He's dead."

"We'll need something to stop the bleeding when I pull the knife out. Tear her petticoat into strips."

"Adam," she said faintly.

Leaning close to her, Ben spoke softly. "Shiloh, it's Ben."

"Adam," she whispered.

"He'll be alright. Lie still now. We have to take care of your hand and get you to the doctor."

Joe handed his father several strips of cloth, and Ben folded two into thick squares. "Joseph, hold her shoulders." He moved next to her hand, took the handle of the knife and pulled hard, removing it in one smooth motion. Shiloh jerked, and then fell back into unconsciousness.

Once Ben had her hand bandaged, he lifted her, carrying her to where Adam lay. Adam turned and saw her bandaged hand, her battered face and all the blood. Reaching out to touch her, he called to her in a strangled cry.

"Joe, get the buggy," said Ben as he looked at the blood-soaked handkerchief covering Adam's wound. By the time he had the handkerchief replaced with extra strips of Shiloh's petticoat, Joe had arrived with his horse and the buggy.

"Help me get Adam into the buggy. Then I'll hand Shiloh up to you."

When they arrived in town, Hoss was just coming out of Paul Martin's office after carrying Mr. Riley in. He scooped Adam out of the buggy and disappeared inside the office. Ben took Shiloh from Joe, and the two men followed Hoss in as a crowd began to gather outside.

Paul asked Hoss and Ben to lay them on beds in the same room so he could decide who to work on first, then ordered them out and closed the door as Joe was about to step in.

The three men stood staring at the door, each man afraid of the worst. When Roy rushed into the office, he stopped and gasped at the look on their faces. "Ben?"

Looking at Roy gravely, Ben slowly sat down on one of the chairs lined against the back wall. He removed his hat and held his head in his hands.

"Joe?" asked Roy.

"They're both in bad shape, Roy."

"Well, what happened?"

"Senator Stewart beat Shiloh pretty bad. And someone back shot Adam."

"Was it Stewart who shot 'im?"

"I don't think so. The shot had to have come from behind Adam, and Stewart was ahead of him. Roy, Stewart's dead. We left him in a clearing a couple of miles west of town.

"Well, who shot Stewart?"

"I don't know. He was dead when I got there."

"I'll have the undertaker go fetch the body. But just as soon as you hear something from Doc Martin, I want you all to come to my office to sort this out."

Mrs. Murdock stepped inside the office with Mrs. Riley. "You sit down here, Sadie. I'll see if I can find out something about Walter. Knocking lightly on the door of the back room, Mrs. Murdock entered, closing the door behind her.

"Mrs. Murdock, I'm glad you're here. With my nurse in Denver visiting her folks, I could use some help," said Paul.

As he finished listing the things he would need and sent Mrs. Murdock off to get them, he heard Adam whisper, "Shiloh?"

"She's right here, Adam. She's resting. The first thing I need to do is get that bullet out of your shoulder and stop the bleeding."

"No. Shiloh first."

"Mrs. Murdock is going to take care of Shiloh while I work on you."

Turning his head, Adam looked over at Shiloh's still body. He struggled to sit up, and Paul tried to push him back down, but Adam fought to stay up. Tears welled in his eyes. "She's not breathing."

"Yes she is, Adam. She's unconscious, but she's as alive as you and me. Now lay back down."

Roy left the doctor's office when the undertaker returned with Stewart's body. He leaned over the back of the wagon and raised the blanket that covered it. "I never met the man. I'll have to find someone who can identify him." Looking around at the two dozen or so men and women standing quietly, waiting for some word from inside the office, he asked loudly, "Is there anyone here who can identify Senator William Stewart?" He got no response. He looked at the undertaker. "It's gonna have to be one of the Cartwrights." Roy went back into the office. "Which one of you can identify Stewart's body?"

Joe stood up and put his hand on Roy's shoulder. "I can, Roy." Once he had confirmed Stewart's identity, Joe turned back toward the office, but the crowd engulfed him.

"Joe, how are they?" asked Sally Cass.

Joe looked at her with hollow eyes. "I don't know yet, Sally. They could use some prayers, though." The crowd split and let him pass.

Several hours passed before Paul came out of the back room. The three Cartwrights and Mrs. Riley all stood. Paul gave Mrs. Riley a kindly smile. "Sadie, Walter will be just fine. He's going to have a headache for a few days. Make sure he takes it easy until I come by to see him. I don't want him working in the store until then."

She nodded. "Thank you, Doctor."

"Mrs. Murdock will bring him out in a few minutes, and you can take him home."

She turned to the Cartwrights. "Ben, boys, I'll be praying for your two to come through this."

"Thank you, Sadie," said Ben, taking her hands.

Paul took Ben's arm, pulling him to the other side of the room and motioning for Hoss and Joe to follow. "Adam will be alright, Ben, with some rest. The bullet went pretty deep, and he lost a lot of blood, but it's out and he's sewn up. I want to keep him here at least overnight."

"Shiloh?"

"She hasn't come to. I'm sure she has a concussion. You just don't take that kind of beating to the head and not end up with one. She has a good many cuts and bruises all over her, and we've cleaned those up. I still need to work on her hand, and there's one bruise on her abdomen I need to watch. I don't know how long, but she'll have to stay as well. Now, I want you and the boys to go get a room at the hotel, and then get a bite to eat. It won't do either of them any good if I have to bring you to the back and treat you, too."

"Paul, I want to stay here tonight."

"I thought you might, Ben. There's a cot in my office you can use. I'm sending Mrs. Murdock home in a few minutes. She'll come back tonight to spell me. Now, they're both resting. Go on and get something to eat. I'll send someone for you if anything changes."

By that evening, Adam was awake and alert. At the moment, neither Paul nor Mrs. Murdock was in the room. He pushed himself up to a sitting position with his good arm, and sat for a few minutes, letting the fog clear from his mind. Looking around for his shirt, he realized they must have cut if off of him. His left shoulder was bandaged, and his arm was in a sling. He looked across the room at Shiloh. She was so still and pale. A blanket had been pulled all the way up to her chin, but her shoulders were bare and uncovered, and he could see the dark shadows of bruises even from across the room. Sliding slowly off the bed until his feet touched the floor, he tentatively stood, not yet trusting his balance. He gradually made his way to her side, and gently touched the bruises on her face and the swelling around her eyes and mouth as a tear dropped onto her shoulder. "I'm so sorry. I promised you I wouldn't let him anywhere near you. Now look what he's done to you." He lifted the cover and caught his breath at the bruises all over her body, and then he saw the heavily bandaged hand. Wiping his face with the back of his hand, he pulled a chair to her bedside and sat next to her, watching her chest rise and fall with each shallow breath. "Why did I ever believe I could have a life with you when everyone else I've ever really loved has left me? My mothers…Ruth." Taking her right hand in his, he whispered, "Stay with me, Shiloh," then kissed her hand and lay his head on the side of the bed.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter Twenty-Two**

A strong hand settled on Adam's shoulder, waking him. "Son, you need to lie back down."

"Hm?" he asked groggily.

"You need to lie back down. Come on."

Adam felt an arm underneath his good arm, pulling him up from the chair. He didn't want to leave her side, but he had no strength left to fight and allowed his father to guide him back into his own bed.

"Here, drink this."

Taking the glass of water from his father, Adam drank it all, and passed the glass back. "She hasn't moved. And Paul hasn't been back to see her."

"It's the middle of the night," Ben said quietly. "Paul said the less she was disturbed, the better off she'd be."

"Better than what?"

"He's worried about her hand and a bruise on her stomach, but she's not in any danger right now."

"What happened to her hand?"

"Lie down, and I'll tell you."

Adam let himself drop down onto the bed and tucked his right arm under his head, closing his eyes. He was in pain, but it was tolerable.

Ben pulled the chair from Shiloh's bedside over to Adam's. "Stewart used a knife to pin her hand to the ground."

Adam lifted his head too quickly and had to fight back a wave of nausea. His first thought was how she would feel if she could no longer play her piano or violin. He gritted his teeth and snarled.

"Now, Adam, there's no point in letting it upset you like this. There was nothing anyone could have done to prevent it, and it's done."

"I should never have left her alone. I knew he would come after her."

"You didn't leave her alone. And no one would ever have thought that he'd enter one of the businesses here and take her. Paul did a little surgery on her hand, and said he thought with some exercise she may be able to regain her flexibility. He's sure she has a concussion, and that's why she hasn't woken up."

Closing his eyes and swallowing hard, Adam said resolutely, "I'm going to kill him."

The room was completely silent for a moment. "Adam, Will Stewart is dead."

An eyebrow arched. "How?"

"Someone shot him."

"Who?"

"We don't know. By the time Joe got to her, he was already dead, and there was no one else around. His gun was still holstered, so it wasn't Shiloh."

"The man who's been following her; he must've have seen Will take her."

Nodding, Ben said, "Possibly, but unless Shiloh can tell us something, we may never know."

Joe quietly pushed the door open for Hoss, who was carrying a pot of soup and a bowl. He looked over at Shiloh, then back at Adam and said quietly, "I knew it. I never saw a bullet that'd keep you down for long, Older Brother. We brought you some soup."

"Thanks, Hoss, but I'm not hungry."

"Son, you'll need your strength when she wakes up. After what Stewart did to her, she'll need you."

Adam cut his eyes away and took a deep breath. "What exactly did he do to her?"

"You know he nearly beat her to death. Aside from her hand…well, her clothes were ripped to shreds. But that doesn't mean what you're thinking. He was fully dressed when Joe found him."

Hoss brought a bowl of soup over on a tray while Joe helped Adam prop up with a pillow behind him. "Now, you eat every bit of that," said Hoss. Mrs. Riley felt so bad that Stewart took her from their store, she stayed up late fixin' that soup just for you."

Mrs. Murdock silently entered the room, and stood with her hands on her hips and a disapproving look on her face.

"Now, Mrs. Murdock, you can't be upset that he's eatin' some soup," said Hoss.

"Hoss Cartwright, it's not the soup that bothers me. It's all the noise you three must be making. These two need to rest. Now as soon as he's finished his soup, you three can go up to your hotel rooms and get some sleep yourselves." When she turned and laid her hand on Shiloh's forehead, Shiloh moved her head back and forth, and a tear trickled down the side of her face. "Joseph, would you run upstairs and knock on Dr. Martin's door? Tell him she's waking up."

Joe jumped up. "Yes, ma'am," he answered, disappearing out the door. Adam handed the bowl back to Hoss who put it down on the table at the foot of the bed.

"You two," she said, pointing to Hoss and Ben. "Out. Now." She pointed at Adam. "You get right back up in that bed. You'll just be in the way."

In another moment, Paul was in the room in his robe, leaning over Shiloh's bed. "Shiloh, it's Paul Martin. Can you hear me?" She groaned and nodded slightly. "You're in my office, and you're safe. Now, I want you to lie still and answer some questions for me." By now, Adam had moved to the foot of her bed. "Do you recognize me?" She nodded.

She licked her lips and grimaced without opening her eyes. "Adam?" she whispered.

"He's right here. Open your eyes. He's at the foot of the bed."

"Adam. Shot."

When Paul looked at Adam and nodded, Adam move to the side of the bed next to Paul and touched her hair. "Shiloh, I'm right here. Open your eyes."

Her eyelids fluttered open and closed, then stayed open in two thin slits that instantly filled with tears. Her arms went up and found him as he bent down to her, holding her gently. "Please keep him away from me," she cried.

"He can't hurt you anymore, Sweetheart. He's dead."

"Adam, stand at the head of the bed so she can see you. I still need to examine her."

Moving her arms from around him, Adam laid her left hand down at her side and held her right while standing behind her and leaning over so she could see him.

"Shiloh, I'm going to take a look at a bruise. Just lie still." Paul lifted the blanket and looked at the bruise on her abdomen. He ran his hand over it and pressed it gently, making Shiloh flinch. "I know it's tender. Try to be still." Pulling the cover back over her, Paul turned to Mrs. Murdock. "Would you prepare a hot cloth, and lay it over that bruise. As long as the area doesn't get hard and the bruising doesn't spread, I think it will be alright." He wrote something on a piece of paper and leaned over Shiloh's face, holding the paper up so she could see it. "Shiloh, can you read what's written on this paper?"

Squinting, she said, "Shiloh Cartwright."

"Good. Now, tell me how many fingers I'm holding up."

"Three."

"Excellent." He raised her left hand up so she could see the bandage. "Shiloh, do you remember what happened to your hand." She squeezed her eyes shut and began to cry again, but she nodded. "You were lucky. The knife did some muscle damage, but it missed the tendons. You'll be stiff, and you'll have to do some exercises, but you should regain normal movement in your hand. Playing your piano or your violin would be wonderful exercise. Now, last question. How's the pain?"

Tears still dripped down the side of her face. "I hurt," she whispered.

"Understandable. I'm going to give you something for the pain. It will also help you sleep."

"Adam," she said in faint voice, looking up at him. "Don't leave me."

"I'm not going anywhere, Sweetheart. I'll be right here."

Shiloh stayed in Paul Martin's office for two more days before he agreed to let her move to a room in the hotel. Hoss carried her over, and once she and Adam were settled, Ben sent Joe and Hoss home to keep the ranches and lumber camps running while Adam recovered. When they got her into the bed, she mumbled because of the bruises and swelling of her face, "Paul, why can't I just go home?"

"Because I don't want you to take that ride just yet, and I want you close so I can check on you. You could still have some ill effects from this."

Hoss had come back to town the first day with a change of clothes for Adam and Shiloh's gown and robe. Mrs. Lewis brought some skirts and blouses for Shiloh and left them in the closet of the bedroom of the suite that she and Adam were sharing with Ben.

She had her first nightmare the first night in the hotel room. Adam had undressed and slipped underneath the covers beside her. He slept close, but didn't hold her, afraid that he'd hurt her. She had fallen into a fitful sleep, and just as he was dozing off, she pushed hard on his chest and started crying, "Let me go!" When she began to hit him, he held up his right arm to block her blows. "Let me go!"

Slipping his arm out of the sling, he grabbed her wrists and shook her gently. "Shiloh! Wake up."

"Please don't do this to me," she cried as she continued to fight him, trying to pull her hands away.

He sat up and pulled her up with him, shaking her. "Shiloh, wake up."

Her fingers dug into his arms, and when she opened her eyes, he saw absolute terror there. Taking her face in his hands, he tried to calm her. "It's alright, Sweetheart. It's me. Adam."

She slumped, shaking, trying to stifle her need to cry. "Adam, I…I couldn't…stop him."

Holding her to him in a tight embrace, he lay back down with her. "I know, Sweetheart. But it's over now. It was just a bad dream." She held on to him, trembling and eventually fell back to sleep. Adam dozed off and on, waking every time she moved. He wondered how long the nightmares would last.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter Twenty-Three**

Adam came out of the bedroom, quietly pulling the door to, and walked to the table in the center of the sitting room where breakfast was waiting for him. He sat down and yawned.

"Bad night?" asked Ben.

"You could say that. She had a nightmare. If last night was any indication, she must have fought him pretty hard."

"Paul said Stewart had some bruises and cuts on his face. He said his lip was split pretty badly. He also said she managed to land to pretty hard blow to his temple. The bullet hit right in the center of his head. Whoever pulled that trigger was an excellent shot." He studied Adam who was deep in thought. "Adam?"

"Hm?" He snorted. "Sorry, Pa."

"Do you have any idea who this other man might be?"

"I was going to ask Shiloh when she came to, but Paul wanted me to wait. I'll ask her today when she wakes up. But Pa, she might not have seen him. Joe said by the time he got there, she was out."

"Adam, your lip." Adam glanced up with a questioning look. "You've got some blood in the corner of your mouth."

Touching his mouth, he said, "She hit me. As a matter of fact, I need to have Paul take a look at my shoulder. I had to use my arm last night to stop her from beating the stew out of me. He needs to look at her hand, too. She was using both." Rising from the chair, he said, "I'll be right back. I'm going to wash my face." When he opened the bedroom door, Shiloh was standing at the window, looking out. "Shiloh, you should be in the bed." She jumped when he spoke and inched her way back to the bed. "What are you looking at?"

"Nothing. I just heard a commotion and got up to look." Once she had made it to the bed, he glanced out the window in the direction she had been looking. When he leaned closer to the window, he saw a man step back into the shadows of the alley across the street. He dipped the corner of a towel into the wash basin and wiped his mouth, then left the room. Grabbing his gun, he shoved the barrel into the front of his trousers and headed for the door.

"Adam, where are you going?"

"I'll be back in a minute, Pa."

Shiloh struggled back out of bed and again stood at the window. She watched Adam walk across the street and into the alley. When he came back out, he looked up at their hotel room window. She backed away, but too late. He had seen her. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath and went back to bed.

"Adam, what was that about?" asked Ben when Adam entered the room.

With a determined looked on his face, he kept walking toward the bedroom as he answered, "I don't know Pa, but I'm about to find out." He shoved his gun back in its holster, and went into the bedroom, closing the door behind him. He stood at the foot of the bed, looking intently at her for a moment before he walked over and sat down beside her. "Shiloh, do you know who shot Will Stewart?"

"No."

"Think about it for a minute. You must have seen someone in that clearing."

"I did, but…everything was blurry. I couldn't see him clearly."

"Do you have an idea what he looked like? The color of his hair; how tall he was?"

She spoke slowly. Her face still hurt. "I think he had dark hair and a beard and mustache. He must've still been there when I passed out. I don't remember him leaving."

He narrowed his eyes. "Shiloh, did you just see him in the alley?"

She sighed. "Adam, I saw a movement. That's all. I can't tell you who shot Will."

"Can't or won't?" he barked as he stood. She gave him a very tired look and turned away. He knew she wasn't telling him something. Maybe she was afraid; maybe she was just too tired. He'd ask again later. "I'll bring you some breakfast. Paul said to make sure you eat."

He had left her alone this morning, and now she was alone again. She had time to think everything through. The thoughts that pushed through to the surface were flashes of Will's attack, the knife cutting through her corset and into her skin, his hands…everywhere, and the knife going into her hand. She brought her hand up and held it at her breast as tears escaped her eyes. _You don't have time to think about Will. He's dead. But Micah. Adam said that Paul pronounced him dead and that Daddy was with him. That means Paul Martin has known all along that Micah is alive._ She could feel rage welling up within her.

Adam entered the room followed by Paul. "Shiloh, I understand you had a rough night," said Paul. Shiloh lay still without turning to look. "Adam thinks I should look at your hand."

He reached down for it, and she pulled it to her. "My hand is fine."

Setting the breakfast tray down on the table next to the window, Adam stood by the bed with his hand on his hip. "Let Paul see your hand."

She slowly held it out, and Paul began to unwrap it. "Adam tells me you're not sleeping well. I want you to take a dose of laudanum at night before you lie down. It will help you sleep without the nightmares." He turned her hand over. "The stitches are still in good shape. I'll add some extra padding this time." When he finished rebandaging her hand, he asked to see her stomach. Adam looked at her sideways as she grudgingly rolled to her back. "This is looking better. The edges are starting to change color which means there's no more bleeding. It should fade away nicely. Now, you, young man. Let me see that shoulder."

Slipping his arm out of the sling, Adam unbuttoned his shirt, letting the left side fall below his shoulder. "It seems you're no worse for wear either."

Shiloh had turned away. "When can I go home?" she asked without looking back.

"When I'm satisfied that you're getting adequate rest and food, I'll let Adam take you home. But you're going to have to do a lot better with your meals before that happens. Adam, one spoonful ought to do the trick," said Paul as he handed Adam a bottle of laudanum out of his medical bag.

Adam pulled his shirt back over his shoulder and walked Paul out, then turned back into the suite. "Pa, why don't you go on back to the ranch? We're both getting around alright now. Paul just wants us to rest."

"We'll see. I still have to finish up this cattle business. Did you have a chance to look at the letter?"

"It looks alright to me. It should be an easy drive, and it's about the time Shiloh and I need to be in Salt Lake anyway."

"Alright. I'll go ahead and answer the letter, and then I'll decide whether to go home."

When Ben left the room, Adam went back into the bedroom. "You heard what Paul said. Sit up so you can eat your breakfast," he said as he helped her up and fluffed the pillows behind her. He placed the tray on her lap.

"I'm not hungry."

"Well, you won't get to go home until you manage to eat more than you've been eating." She scowled and picked up the fork. "Now, you want to tell what that business was with Paul?"

"I don't know what you mean," she said impassively without looking up at him.

"Paul Martin has been our friend for a long time. Why were you so short with him?"

"I'm sorry you felt that way, Adam." She set the fork down on the plate. "I just want to go home. Do you realize the people here walk down the street and look up at this window as they pass? And can you just imagine what will be in the newspaper when this gets out. I can see it now. Love triangle ends in death. Will Stewart loses."

He pulled a chair next to the bed and sat on the edge of the seat. "Why don't you lay down for a nap after you finish eating? You didn't get much sleep last night. You'll feel better after you get some rest."

"I don't want to sleep. I need to…think."

"No, you don't. You need to stop thinking and rest," he said as he rose from the chair. "I'll get you a glass of milk to wash that down." He left the room and poured a glass of milk from the pitcher on the table in the sitting room. Leaning back to look in the bedroom to make sure she wasn't watching, he opened the bottle of laudanum and put two spoonfuls in the milk, stirring it. He'd had enough experience with laudanum on his own to know that one spoonful would make her drowsy; two would make her sleep. "Here you go, Sweetheart. If you can't finish your food, at least drink the milk." She left the half eaten food, and sat back to drink.

"Adam, what will this do to our schedule? We were supposed to be in San Francisco in two weeks."

"The timber we were delivering was early, so that won't matter. I'll have to send Robert a wire to tell him we need to postpone the inspection of the courthouse foundation for a week. I don't think that will matter. They're not scheduled to finish it for another month."

"Will we lose the teamsters?"

"Teamsters are constantly moving lumber from the south side of the lake. I'm sure we can find someone else." He leaned forward and took the tray as she turned the glass up for the last few drops of milk. "Sweetheart, don't worry about the work. You need to concentrate on getting better." She smiled and looked toward the window, finding it difficult to keep her eyes open. "Why don't you lie down?"

Nodding, she slowly moved down in the bed while he moved the pillows. Just before she fell asleep, she whispered, "You put laudanum in my milk, didn't you?" Before he could answer, she had drifted off to sleep.


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter Twenty-Four**

After another four days of bed rest, Dr. Martin allowed Adam to take Shiloh home with strict orders for more bed rest. The swelling around her eyes had subsided, but the bruises were still dark blue and purple with red dots around them. She was sore everywhere and still limped from the ankle she sprained while jumping from the moving buggy.

Adam's arm was not healed enough to participate in any strenuous work, but he did manage it. He had received a wire from Crocker telling him to stop cutting after the second contract for railroad ties was completed until further notice. With the help of Sam Clemens, Adam found there was a power struggle within the railroad company ranks between Theodore Judah and the men who had become known as the Big Four. Their debate dealt with funding; whether to wait for the issue of government bonds or continue laying track on the personal credit of the investors. Still, the loggers Ben had hired were kept busy cutting and milling the square sets for the four mines with whom the Cartwrights were under contract.

To Adam's vexation, Shiloh had begun to hobble out to the corrals near the house. She wasn't yet able to work with her horses, but she did direct Hoss who was also helping to train Tom. The men had moved her piano into the house under Adam's intense scrutiny, and the same afternoon, they reinstalled the window in the parlor.

When Shiloh wasn't busy, she was withdrawn. She had tried to play her piano, but her hand wasn't yet healed enough to completely straighten or bend her fingers. Her nightmares continued, though the thrashing that Adam had been taking had ended. Instead she woke up in cold sweats with an occasional spine-chilling scream.

Most nights she sat in the parlor, staring off into space for awhile before she quietly went up to bed without even saying goodnight. Tonight was different. When Adam went to check on her in the parlor, she wasn't there. He usually saw her on her way to the stairs, but knew he could have missed her while he was poring over drawings for his Salt Lake project for Slater. Climbing the stairs, he slowly opened the bedroom door. She wasn't there. He trotted back down the stairs and went into the kitchen. She wasn't there. "Shiloh!" Standing in the middle of the house, he spun around when he heard the front door open. "Shiloh, where have you been?"

She limped into the door, closing it behind her, and answered quietly. "I went out for some fresh air." Tottering by him, she walked into the parlor and sat on the sofa with her knees drawn up against her chest and her head lying on top of them. Micah had been outside. Now she had a chill that she couldn't shake. The one question she had asked was all he had time to explain. Why? He told her about the gunfight with the youngest Horton; a gunfight he had won; a gunfight over a girl. The oldest Horton had come for him next the night he and Adam had gone to town, only this time, he didn't win. There were nine Horton brothers who would keep coming and coming until they did kill him. If he had run, they would have come after his father and little sister. The Hortons had a well-known reputation in the early days of the mining camp that became Virginia City. Paul Martin was new to the territory, but he, like everyone else in the settlement knew just how bad the Hortons could be, so he went along with Micah's plan to disappear. When her father came into the camp, he saw the wisdom of it. After that Amos stopped living for anything but his horses, and he took that secret to his grave.

Adam stood in the doorway of the parlor for a few minutes before he moved to sit on the hearth, watching her. She hadn't moved, except for an occasional deep breath.

She had no idea what to do. She knew that Adam believed she recognized Will Stewart's killer. Both he and Micah wanted to protect her. If she told Adam about Micah, she would be putting Micah's life in jeopardy. If she didn't tell Adam, Micah would be safe, but the secret could irreparably damage her marriage.

She didn't hear Adam walk over to the sofa. When he sat beside her she tensed, feeling his eyes on her. "Shiloh, you need to tell me what you're hiding before it eats you alive."

Without raising her head, she replied, "I can't tell you. You wouldn't believe me anyway."

Every muscle in his body tightened. "Are you saying you don't trust me?"

"I trust you with my life."

"Then let me help."

She raised her head. "I'm sure you could help, Adam. I'm just afraid of how your principles will allow you to help. And I'm afraid that…you'll feel betrayed." She turned to him. His mouth opened slightly, and he crooked his jaw. Shaking her head, she whispered. "Not by me."

"Shiloh, if this man is in trouble, running or hiding isn't going to fix it."

"He's not running. He's trying to protect me….us."

Adam bit the inside of his cheek and furrowed his brow. He stood and pulled her up off the sofa. "Shiloh, it's my job to protect us." She tried to turn away, but he held her so that he could see her eyes. "You know who he is. Tell me."

"I can't betray him," she cried.

"But you can betray me?"

"How am I betraying you?"

"You're my wife. We're not supposed to have secrets." She struggled to free herself from his grip, but he held on until she stopped fighting. Her eyes turned hopeless as they filled with tears. "Shiloh, trust me," he said, tenderly holding her against him.

"It was Micah," she whispered.

He glared at her for a moment before he released her, and then walked to the hearth, staring at the empty fire box. Spinning back around on his heel, he asked angrily, "How do you expect me to believe that?"

Her heart sank. "I told you you wouldn't believe me. I spoke to him tonight. He's here."

Micah had been listening outside the window. Now, he opened the front door. Adam stopped and looked toward the French doors of the parlor, listening while Shiloh held her breath. They heard slow steps on the wood floor coming closer until Micah stood at the door. Adam was looking into the face of his best friend, his wife's brother, a man he knew to be long dead.


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter Twenty-Five**

"I like what you've done with the parlor. I'm glad you were here when the tree fell," said Micah.

Adam walked slowly forward, stopping right in front of Micah. He began to turn away, but quickly turned back, swinging and landing a blow that sent Micah to the floor. Shiloh backed up with her hand covering her mouth.

Propping up on an elbow, Micah rubbed his chin. "What was that for?"

Adam's eyes were cold. "That was for what you did to your sister."

"I guess I deserved that," said Micah, getting to his feet.

Adam turned toward Shiloh. "How long have you been watching her?" Before Micah could answer, Adam swung again. This time Micah lay still, looking back up. "That was for what you did to me," growled Adam.

Lying back on the floor, Micah let out a deep breath. "Are you done?"

"I don't know."

Again, Micah got to his feet. "I've been watching her since she left for New York. While she was with Dad, I didn't worry. He knew who to look out for. But when she met Will Stewart I knew she was in trouble."

Adam's arm was out of the sling and on his hip. "You did this because of the Hortons?" he shouted.

"You know as well as I do they would've kept coming after me for killing their little brother, and there was a good chance they'd go after Dad or Shiloh. I had to protect them."

Shiloh backed up against the wall, listening to the two men yell at each other.

Gritting his teeth, Adam asked, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because you would have exposed me. Just like you want to do now."

Looking down, Adam took a deep, calming breath. "Micah, it was a fair fight. You had no reason to run."

"I told you," said Micah just as calmly. "I had to protect Dad and Shiloh."

Adam walked toward Shiloh as he spoke. "Why are you hiding now? We can take care of the Hortons." When he reached her he held her face in his hands, and then cradled her in his arms.

"It's not the Hortons I'm worried about now."

"Then what?" Adam asked angrily.

"Adam, I had to earn a living. I do that with my gun."

Adam turned back around and took a step forward. "You're a gun fighter?" he asked unconvinced. "I would have heard something."

"You probably have. You just didn't know it."

"Who?"

"Mort Williams."

"You're Mort Williams…the range detective," said Adam, seething.

"I couldn't very well be Micah Whitney. The Hortons would have come after me or they would have come after Shiloh if they knew I was alive. And Mort Williams would have brought some pretty bad men right to Shiloh's door if anyone knew."

Shiloh stepped between them. "What about now?" she asked. "Shave the beard and the mustache. Let Mort Williams disappear and be Micah Whitney again."

Shaking his head, Micah said, "Shy, that would raise too many questions."

Adam stepped behind her, resting his hands on her shoulders. "Only from the Hortons. No one has to know about Mort Williams."

Leaning into Micah, Shiloh looked up into his eyes. "Micah, it's time for you to come home."

"Come home to what?" he asked, touching her face. "This place is yours and Adam's now."

"Daddy always meant for it to be yours," said Shiloh. "You must know Adam is building a house for us on the Ponderosa. You can live here, Micah. You can settle down and raise a family here."

"Micah, there's something else you need to consider."

"What's that, Adam?"

"What you've done to your sister. How do you think she felt losing you after she lost her mother; and then losing her father? She's always felt she had no family."

"She got over it."

"No, I didn't, Micah," Shiloh said quietly. "Adam is right. There's always been a huge hole in my heart that even he can't fill." Her eyes filled with tears as her chin quivered. "I need you to stay."

Adam walked behind Micah while Shiloh was speaking and slipped Micah's gun out of his holster. "I'm not going to let you leave."

"What are you going to do when the Hortons show up?"

Both men turned when they heard Ben Cartwright's voice in the entry way. "They'll have to come through all of us."

Taking his hands in hers, and with tears streaming down her face, she pleaded, "Please, Micah, don't leave me again."

He enveloped her in his arms, took a deep breath and nodded at Adam, then whispered in her ear, "No more hiding."

When Shiloh heard those words, she gave in to emotional fatigue from the last few weeks and physical exhaustion from her injuries. Micah held her up until Adam took her, carrying her up to the bedroom.


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter Twenty-Six**

"Shiloh, I want to you rest for awhile," said Adam as he laid her on the bed. She didn't let go, keeping her arms wrapped tightly around him and sobbing onto his neck. Adam sat down, holding her and letting her cry. After a few moments, he pulled her arms from around him and lowered her to her pillow. "Get some rest. We'll talk tomorrow."

"Please don't let him leave."

"He'll stay for you." Bending down to her and kissing her softly, he wiped the tears from her cheeks and kissed her again before he blew out the lamp and quietly left the room, pulling the door closed behind him.

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Ben watched Adam carry Shiloh up the stairs before he approached Micah wearing a mildly shocked look, but extending his hand. Micah shook his hand warmly, and the two men embraced. Ben remembered him as a young man. He had grown into a man's body, and his face had become a man's face, but he had the same dark hair, blue eyes and bright smile that he inherited from his mother and shared with his sister.

"Micah, I don't know what to say. We all thought…we all knew you were dead."

"How much did you hear, Mr. Cartwright?"

"I heard all of it. Amos knew the whole time?"

"Yessir," said Micah, casting his eyes to the floor. "I know I hurt everyone," he started, looking back toward the stairs. "Especially Shy, but at the time, it seemed the only thing to do to keep her safe."

Adam walked slowly down the stairs, heading toward the kitchen. "Why don't you two have a seat in the parlor while I put a pot of coffee on? I have a feeling it's going to be a long night." When he entered the kitchen, Ming Lin was already preparing the tray. Adam smiled and shook his head, then went back to the parlor.

"How is she?" asked Micah.

"I don't know. She's been through a lot in the last two weeks. Besides that, our marriage has been a big change for her." Adam bent his head and rubbed the back of his neck while Ming Lin brought in the coffee and served everyone, then retreated to the kitchen.

"How do you plan to protect her from the Hortons when they find out I'm alive?"

Adam snorted. "You've been so busy watching Shiloh that you haven't been paying attention. There are only three Hortons left; Raymond, James and Earl. And the only one of those who causes any problems these days is Raymond."

"At least he left Dad and Shiloh alone after he shot me." Ben and Adam glanced at each other, and Micah caught the look. "Did something happen?"

Ben shifted in his chair. "One of the reasons Adam spoke to your father about sending Shiloh to school back East was because Ray made some threats."

"What kind of threats?" asked Micah, sitting on the edge of his chair.

Creasing his eyebrows, Adam explained, "He said he was going to take her when she was old enough; that it would serve you right for killing his brother if he ended up with her. Then he'd take it out on her." When Micah tensed, Adam shook his head. "Micah, that was eight or nine years ago. He hasn't caused any trouble since she's been back."

"You know that's liable to change."

"And if it does, we'll take care of it," said Ben. "Now, I'd like to know why you followed her to New York."

"She was still a kid when you sent her back there, Adam. I didn't think she had any business going to New York on her own. But she did alright…until she met Stewart. I knew from the beginning he was trouble. He already had a reputation for being rough with the ladies. Then after Shiloh came home, I worked for awhile until I found out he was going to San Francisco. So I came back and watched her." He cut his eyes over at Adam with an amused smile. "I watched her with you, too. I should probably apologize for that, but considering how it turned out, I don't think I will." Adam smirked.

Ben took a deep breath. "Micah, you know we have to talk to Roy. He's still looking for Stewart's killer." Micah started to speak, and Ben raised his hand. "Let me finish. There's no doubt in anyone's mind that…this stranger…saved Shiloh's life. That won't be a problem. But there's the question of Mort Williams. You're going to have to answer to the law, if you broke it."

"Mr. Cartwright, I'm not wanted anywhere if that's what you mean. Everything I did was legal."

"Normally, I wouldn't believe one word out of the mouth of a range detective, but I'm going to take you at your word, Micah." He looked over at Adam, then back to Micah. "It's agreed then. There will be no more mention of Mort Williams."

"You've come forward at a good time," said Adam, smiling. "We've got a lot of work to do."

"Before we talk about that, we need to talk about the man who shot you." Both Adam and Ben straightened. "He's fairly new, and I have no idea where he came from. He rode into town a couple of days after Stewart, and for awhile just sat in front of the Sazerac and watched you every time you came into town. He asked questions, so I don't think he knew what you looked like before he got here, but after he got some answers, he started following you. The day you and Shiloh heard gunshots on the way back to the ranch…Stewart was there. This other fella was there, and he was ready to shoot then."

"You fired those shots as a warning," said Adam, cocking his head.

Micah nodded. "The day you were shot, after I took care of Stewart, I tried to track him, but by that time he was long gone. He's still around. You need to watch your back."

Ben grunted and stood. "It's late. I should be getting back to the Ponderosa."

"Why did you come by?" asked Adam.

"Oh, I wanted to find out when you thought you'd be ready to haul the dock timber and the railroad ties to Sacramento. I'm going to be in town tomorrow, and there's another group of teamsters coming through who'll be looking for something to haul."

Adam stood, and taking a deep breath, he scratched his head. "I was hoping to take care of Shiloh's horses and my trip to San Francisco at the same time we hauled the timber to Sacramento. But we can't wait any later than next week. The timber will be due, and I need to inspect the courthouse foundation. I don't know if Shiloh will be ready to make that kind of a trip. If she's not, we'll have to go without her. We can make another trip for the horses when she's able."

"Alright then. I'll see if they'll wait for the load." Micah and Adam walked him to the front door. "Now Micah, you remember. Anything you need, all you have to do is ask. You're as much a member of the family as Shiloh."

Micah took Ben's hand. "I'll remember, Mr. Cartwright."

"Adam."

"Night, Pa."

When the two men walked back into the parlor, the mantel clock struck eleven thirty. "Where's your horse?"

"He's in the barn," snorted Micah. Adam gave him an incredulous look. "My horse has been in your barn almost every night since Stewart got into town. I've been watching you from the top of the hill, and after everyone turned in, I came down and slept in the hayloft."

Adam's nostrils flared. "You find that amusing?"

Laughing, Micah answered as they walked to the barn together, "For a man who's so intent on protecting his wife, you aren't real observant."

"Well, when Shiloh was with me in our bedroom, I had no reason to worry about her," said Adam, wearing a half-smile.

"Hey, that's my little sister you're talking about. I don't find that amusing at all. You and I are gonna talk about that."

"About what?"

"You and my little sister…my _young_ little sister."

Chuckling, Adam put a hand on Micah's shoulder. "Tomorrow. It's late, and we have a long day ahead of us. Now get your things. You're room is right where you left it," said Adam, turning back toward the house.


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter Twenty-Seven**

Quietly opening the bedroom door, Adam hesitated for a moment when he saw Shiloh sitting in front of her dressing table mirror naked. He stepped in and softly closed the door. She gave no indication that she heard him. Rather she continued to stare at herself in the mirror.

Adam moved to the bed and sat down, removing his boots. "Your bruises are starting to fade."

"The ones you can see, I suppose."

He could see the wetness on her face shining in the light of the lamp next to her. "Shiloh, he can never hurt you again…thanks to Micah. And if Micah hadn't killed him, I would have for what he did to you."

"Adam, did you know he was going to kill me?"

Adam's head shot up. "Sweetheart, I realize how badly he beat you, but you were his obsession. Why would he want to kill you?"

"I made him angry. I hit him on the side of the head with a rock. He was going to hit me with it when Micah shot him. I think he realized I wasn't going to be easily controlled and decided I would be too much trouble."

Standing behind her, Adam looked at her reflection in the mirror; really looked at her for the first time since he'd seen her in Dr. Martin's office. Aside from the bruises all over her, he found what looked like a bite mark on the top of her shoulder. With his eyes, he traced a cut from the center of her breasts down to just above her navel. And there was a bruise that looked vaguely like a hand print on her right breast. He pulled her chair around and knelt in front of her. Aside from the large bruise on her abdomen, there were bruises on her thighs. Closing his eyes, he realized Stewart had done more than he'd thought.

New tears rolled down her cheek as she choked out an apology. "I'm so sorry. I tried to stop him."

His mouth opened and his brow furrowed. "Shiloh, you've done nothing wrong. This wasn't you're fault." Pulling her forward into his arms, he stood up with her, holding her tightly. "If anyone is to blame here besides Will, it's me. I never should have left you alone."

"It wouldn't have mattered. He would have killed you. He tried."

"Will had nothing to do with that shot."

Looking up at him, she sniffled, "Then who shot you?"

Tightening his lips, he shook his head almost imperceptibly. "It's not important right now, Sweetheart. I need to find a way to help you through this. Tell me how I can help you."

She gently pushed away from him and walked around the bed. "I don't know that there's anything you can do. I just need time. I need things…" Her nose wrinkled as the tears started again. "I just need things to be…easier." Pulling back the bed covers, she slipped underneath and curled into a ball, facing away from him. He finished undressing, blew the lamp out and slid in beside her, drawing her into him and holding her until she fell asleep.

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Waking with a jerk when she saw the rock Will was holding above her come rushing down into her face, she rolled to her back, glistening with sweat in the moonlight shining through the bedroom windows. Chilled to the bone, she pulled the cover up over her. She stared up at the ceiling, toying with the idea of getting up since she was wide awake. Why bother? She wouldn't be able to concentrate on any of her desk work. She looked back at Adam. A touch is all it would take for him to reach for her and pull her into the warmth of his body, and at the moment, she was shivering. Turning to her side, she lightly placed a hand on his chest. He took a slow, deep breath, moving his hand to hers, and then rolling toward her, he reached until he found her and drew her into him, surrounding her in his arms as he nuzzled her cheek, kissed her jaw, and settled back into a comfortable sleep. She lay still and quiet, listening to him breathe deep and long and letting his warmth flow into her.

She knew she was lucky to have someone like Adam, someone who never faltered with responsibilities or obligations; someone who defended those he loved; someone who loved fiercely, devotedly, completely. Was she selfish in wanting to continue as she had before their marriage, or should she quit trying to hold on to her independence? Would that be giving in or giving up? She could learn to cook. She could clean. But then, she wouldn't be the same person he chose to marry. The truth was she didn't exactly know what he wanted. She no longer knew what she wanted either. Then she wondered when she had gotten so good at circular thinking.

He and Micah would be going into town tomorrow to speak with Sheriff Coffee. She was sure he would want her to see Dr. Martin, but she had no desire to see him. He had been lying all these years when he knew she had been hurting all that time for losing Micah. And her father…would she ever be able to think of her father the same way? Then there was Micah. She was so happy that he was finally home. But he could have told her instead of letting her think he was dead. He could have explained it all. She loved him without a doubt, but she was angry with him, too. She pressed into Adam's body as tears started again, and she felt his arms tighten around her.

Feeling the tickle of a teardrop slowly making its way through his chest hair, he opened his eyes and watched her. "Why don't you take the laudanum, Sweetheart? It will help you sleep."

"Will lives in my sleep," she whispered. "Even with the laudanum."

When Adam rolled over on her, he didn't expect to be pushed away. Jumping out of bed, she grabbed her robe and headed out the bedroom door. She stopped on the front porch, and trembling, she wrapped her arms around a post, squeezing her eyes shut. She flinched when Adam touched her arms. "How can you look at me?" she cried. "How could you want me after he touched me that way?"

Moving his hands up to her shoulders, he leaned in and whispered in her ear. "It doesn't matter what he did. I love you. I want you. That will never change." When she turned, he pulled her against him and kissed the top of her head as she sobbed. He had expected this much sooner. Breathing a sigh of relief, he closed his eyes. He was glad she was getting it out. Maybe now, she could move beyond it and start living again.


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter Twenty-Eight**

As Ming Lin placed the breakfast dishes on the table, he kept glancing over at Micah with a wary look. "Ming Lin, this is Micah Whitney, Mrs. Cartwright's brother. He'll be living here now," said Adam. Ming Lin nodded and turned back toward the kitchen, but before he left the room, he looked back one more time, this time with a look more of surprise. When Adam caught his eye, he hurried on. "We need to tell Joe and Hoss…and Hop Sing…before they find out in town."

Shiloh sipped her coffee. "Today is Hop Sing and Ming Lin's day in town. You need to ride over to the Ponderosa and tell everyone before you leave for Virginia City."

"You're going with us," said Adam, chewing his eggs.

"No, I'm not. I have…things…to do," she said without looking up at him.

Adam stopped eating and watched her, hoping this wasn't going to turn into a fight. "Dr. Martin will want to look at your hand, and I want to ask him if a trip to San Francisco will be alright. You need to go with us."

She pushed her eggs around, finally scooping them up on her fork, and before she put them in her mouth, she said, "I'm not going to see Dr. Martin again. I'll see Dr. Kay." Dropping her fork, she wiped her mouth on her napkin, picked up her coffee cup and limped out of the dining room.

Adam stood to follow her, but Micah stopped him. "I know what's going on. I'll talk to her." He found her in the study, pulling her horse records out of the drawer. Stopping at the door, he leaned against the door frame. "You can't blame him. He was sworn to secrecy."

"He knew how much I was hurting."

"Yes, he did. But he also knew that by telling you, he would be putting your life at risk." She continued to write in her books. "Shiloh, if you're going to be angry with Paul, you have to be equally as angry at Dad."

She slammed her pencil down on the desk, clasped her hands in front of her and propped her chin on them. "Micah, did you ever think for one minute that telling me wasn't the same thing as telling the world. I could have kept that secret. At least I would have known you weren't dead."

"Ah, Shy. There were so many things that could have gone wrong if we had told you." By this time, Adam was standing just outside the door, leaning on the other side.

"Like what?" she asked, glaring up at him.

"First, you were only nine when it happened…too young to understand. And what would you have done when you found out Dad was dying?" She opened her mouth to speak, but he continued. "You would have made an attempt to contact me. Dad and I had already agreed there would be no contact."

Adam entered the study and sat on the side of the desk. "Sweetheart, what is the point of being angry now? What's done is done."

"That might be easy for you, Adam, but I can't just turn off my emotions," she snapped.

Grimacing, he scratched behind his ear. "I don't expect you not to feel what you feel, but I do expect you to use that educated brain of yours and reason that it will do you no good." Folding her hands on the desk, she turned away wearing a sad look. Adam reached over and took her good hand. "Let's go back to the table and finish breakfast, then we'll all ride over to the Ponderosa and talk to them. Pa may have already told them." As he was speaking, he rose from the desk and stood beside her chair, pushing it away from the desk and pulling her up. "Then we'll all go into town and talk to Roy."

"Why can't I stay at home?"

"Because I don't want you alone here when the whole town finds out Micah is alive."

Her brow furrowed. "Why? Will is dead. My shadow has revealed himself. There's no reason I can't be alone."

He winced and closed his eyes, then opened one, looking at Micah who stepped forward. "Shy, when the town founds out I'm alive, the Hortons will also find out."

She withered and closed her eyes. "You have no idea if the Hortons will do anything. There aren't that many of them left. They'd be fools to go up against you here."

"That may be true for a normal man, but Ray Horton is not normal." Micah turned to leave the study. "He's just plain mean." Adam raised his eyebrows and smirked as he motioned for Shiloh to follow Micah.

When they were all seated at the table again, Shiloh made no motion to eat. Micah and Adam glared at her. She sighed deeply. "With the two of you here, I feel like I'm eight years old again."

"That reminds me," said Micah, waving his fork at Adam. "You told me what you were going to do when she turned sixteen to get me to fight, but you always said afterward you were just kidding."

Adam shrugged and continued to eat. "I don't know what you're upset about. I waited until she was twenty-three."

Shiloh's jaw dropped. She hid her face with her hand on her forehead as she ate while the two men chuckled.

When the three arrived at the Ponderosa, Hoss and Joe were walking out of the house. Both stopped and gaped at the third person to ride up. Shiloh and Adam looked at each other. "He didn't tell them," said Shiloh.

Raising his eyebrows, Adam said, "I guess not. Wait. I'll help you down." Shiloh's left hand was still bandaged and fairly useless, especially for holding the horn of her saddle. Besides that, she was still limping from the badly sprained ankle and had no intention of stepping down out of the saddle without help to soften the landing. Bringing her leg over and sliding down into Adam's waiting hands, he held her for just a moment right above the ground and kissed her before he gently set her down. Then he turned to his brothers. "Hoss, Joe, I'd like you to meet Shiloh's big brother, Micah."

Hoss's surprised look became a slow smile as he stepped forward with his hand extended. "This story's gonna be a good one. I can tell already."

"Hoss," said Micah, taking Hoss's hand and wrapping the other arm around his shoulder. "I don't suppose you refer to Adam as your big brother anymore."

"Naw, he's older brother."

Joe stood back with his arms crossed, looking from Micah to Shiloh and back to Micah. "I don't suppose you know what you did to your sister. I was too young to really remember you, but I remember what Shiloh went through for years."

Taking Shiloh's arm and moving toward the house, Adam stopped next to Joe. "You're a little late, Joe. We've already done that."

Shiloh moved away from Adam and wrapped her arm around Joe's. Bowing her head, she said, "If it makes you feel any better, Adam knocked him to the floor…twice." She cut her eyes up toward his with a slight smile. "We still have to tell Hop Sing," she said as Joe walked her into the house.

"Where's Pa?" asked Adam, looking toward the desk before he walked into the sitting area. He turned when he heard his father's voice on the stairs.

"I'm right here. Is everyone ready to go?" I'd like to get this over with so we can get on with work."

"Pa, I'm surprised you didn't tell Hoss and Joe. Did you tell Hop Sing?" Ben looked back at Adam, raised his eyebrows and shook his head. The corner of Adam's mouth turned up. "You're not afraid of Hop Sing, are you?"

Shoving his hands in his pockets, Ben stopped at the bottom of the stairs. "You know how he dotes on her. He spent a lot of time trying to cheer her up."

Adam walked toward the kitchen, chuckling. "Hop Sing, would you come out here for a minute?"

Both Hop Sing and Ming Lin appeared. "Hop Sing already know." Standing in front of Micah, he pointed his finger. "You bad brother. Hop Sing all time try to cheer little sista up. You make her vely sad." He turned back to the kitchen, muttering in Cantonese. Ming Lin scowled and followed.

"Well, I haven't made many friends today, have I?" said Micah.

"Give it time," said Adam with his arm across Micah's shoulders. "People will be surprised, but they'll get used to it."

The Cartwrights and the Whitneys rode to town, spending more than an hour in Sheriff Coffee's office. By the time they left, everyone but Hoss had made statements concerning Will Stewart's death. "Now, I don't see a reason to hold a hearing," said Roy, "but because Mr. Stewart was an important man in San Francisco and back East, the territorial judge may not agree with me. I'll let you know if there'll be one as soon as I find out."

The folks that had lived in Virginia City for years all recognized Micah and turned to stare. The newer residents paid him no mind. But one resident, who had been in the crowd the night Micah was shot, not only recognized him, he bolted out of town toward the Horton's place. Ray Horton knew Micah Whitney was alive and well before the Cartwrights and the Whitneys left Roy's office.


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter Twenty-Nine**

When they left Roy's office, Shiloh and Adam walked to Dr. Martin's office while the rest waited in the saloon. "Adam, I told you, I don't want to see Dr. Martin."

"Paul is the one who stitched up your hand, and Paul is the one who is going to tell us how it is and whether you can ride to San Francisco with your horses." He looked down at her as they walked down the boardwalk. "I'm not going to argue with you about it." Her expression turned stone cold, but she didn't fight him, thinking there would be no point. _I couldn't stop Will. Why did I ever believe I could stop anyone?_

Adam opened the door of the office. "Paul?" Dr. Martin stepped into the waiting room from his office. "Paul, do you have some time this morning to check Shiloh's hand?"

"Of course. It shouldn't take but a few minutes. Come on back." When they were all in the back room with the door closed, Paul said. "I should probably take a look at that bruise as well." When he started unwrapping her hand, he asked, "Shiloh, is something bothering you?"

"You haven't heard? Micah came home," she replied coldly.

He stopped and glanced up at her. "And now you're angry with me because I didn't tell you he was alive." She looked away. He continued speaking while he unwrapped and examined her hand. "Do you have any idea how many people, both men and women, I've had to treat or pronounce dead because of Raymond Horton?" He shook his head. "I will never regret not putting you in his sights…or your father." Looking closely at both sides of her hand, he said, "I think we can get away with removing those stitches, but it needs to stay bandaged for at least another week, and I don't want you to try to use it yet. Before we do that, let's have a look at that bruise. Why don't you lie down on the bed?"

She made no motion to comply, so Adam, who had been standing behind her the whole time, picked her up and sat her down a little harder than normal on the high bed, glaring at her with an arched eyebrow. He had reached forward to unfasten her britches when she quickly began to unbutton them herself, and then lowered the top of her drawers to expose the bruise on her stomach.

"Well, it's faded to a lovely shade of green as have most of them." He looked at the bruises on her face. "They're beginning to fade as well. Any loose teeth?"

"No," she spat.

"Alright, get dressed, and I'll remove the stitches."

"Paul, we were planning a trip to San Francisco to take some horses if you think she's well enough to go."

"Since you're taking horses, I assume you'll be riding?" Adam nodded. Paul lowered his head in thought for a moment, and then looked at Shiloh. Her angry expression had changed to eagerness. "She can't use the hand to get in or out of the saddle, but since you rode in today, I assume you've already got that figured out." Again, Adam nodded; this time smiling. "I expect she'll get tired easily, so you need to allow for plenty of time for rest. And since you're traveling, I want the hand to stay bandaged until you get back."

"We won't be going very fast," said Adam. We'll be following some teamsters to Sacramento."

While they were there, Paul examined Adam's shoulder as well, removing the stitches. "Adam, I don't want you doing anything that will put a strain on that shoulder just yet. When the pain is completely gone, you can go back to your normal routine. And I see you've already gotten rid of the sling."

"Thanks, Paul. Uh…about Shiloh…"

"There's no need to apologize. I'm sure she's just as angry at Micah…and her father. She just needs time."

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Raymond Horton stood on the front porch of the house he shared with his brothers, James and Earl. The house was a large house, having held nine brothers, but with most of them gone, it had fallen into disrepair. The remaining Hortons had no interest in keeping up with the house or the property. If they weren't robbing people at gunpoint along the roads or in the small mining towns scattered about for hundreds of miles, they were at home, working on a slow drunk.

Speaking over his shoulder to his brothers, who were also standing on the front porch, watching the messenger ride away, Ray said, "Ain't a man alive that's put a Horton in his grave, least-wise, that's what I thought." He turned back to the house and the whiskey bottle. "Seems we got some rectifying to do, boys."

"Just how you think we're gonna do that with him in thick with those Cartwrights?" asked Earl.

"We wait. Let 'em think the Hortons ain't what they used to be. Then we take one. Don't matter which one."

"What good'll that do?" asked James.

"A Cartwright for a Whitney, Jimmy boy. I don't rightly see them Cartwrights stickin' their necks out that far for someone who ain't their own."

"But the oldest boy, Adam; he's married to the Whitney girl."

"Yeah, but he ain't married to the Whitney boy."

Earl stood in front of his brother. "Ray, maybe it's time to let it go. After all, it was a fair fight. Billy was just slow…and stupid for trying to take that girl."

Ray turned to put his whiskey glass down on the table, and when he turned back, he backhanded Earl. "Like I said, ain't a man alive that's put a Horton in his grave."


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter Thirty**

Adam met Jim Tyler at the Ponderosa property with the plans for the house and the barn. The two men walked around the property with Adam explaining how he wanted the house positioned, then walked down the hill to the site for the barn.

"Now, remember Jim. Not a word to anyone. She's probably forgotten that I hired you for the house, and she has no idea that you've started. I want this to be surprise."

"That shouldn't be a problem, Adam. This place is deep enough on the Ponderosa that no one is going to stumble onto it. And my men won't say anything. They value their jobs."

xxxxxxxx

When Adam walked into the ranch house, Shiloh was in the study with letters for horses spread all over the desk. He walked around to kiss her. "What's all this?"

"It's all the requests that came from San Francisco. We'll be taking…" she counted the requests she had possible matches for. "…twelve horses with us."

"You've got buyers for twelve horses?" asked Adam, surprised.

"No, I have buyers for nine horses, but I'm taking three extra just in case someone isn't happy with the horse I chose for them." She dropped one of the requests on the desk in front of him. "That one may be hard to fill."

He picked up the letter and read it. "Imposing and striking animals to pull his carriage?"

"Yes, it seems he's English. Maybe he's trying to keep up with the Queen," she snorted. "Would you mind if we ride Eli and Apollo? Then if I take one of the Clydesdales, I can give him an idea of something we can breed. He may like the Clydesdale." She put a hand on her hip and raised the other to her chin. "I've never even thought about training a Clydesdale, but then the training would have to be different for a carriage."

"So that's thirteen horses we're taking? We'll need help with that many horses. You can't handle any with your hand."

"I was thinking Micah could go with us. And I'll take one of my men."

Raising his chin and looking down at her, he asked, "Which one?"

She bowed her head and bit her lip, then looked him square in the eye. "Tom."

Taking a deep breath, he puckered his mouth, then turned and left the study.

She followed him. "Adam, I honestly don't see what problem you have with Tom. I know he was a bully before, but he's proven himself…at least to me."

"Sweetheart, a leopard can't change his spots," he said, turning to face her with his hands out at his sides.

"He's not a leopard. He's a man. And men can change." She crossed her arms. "You haven't given him a chance."

Walking into the parlor, he stopped when he saw the mantel. Words were forming on his lips, but he didn't get them out.

"Do you like it?" asked Shiloh, stepping to his side.

He looked down at her, then back at the mantel, stepping closer to examine it. "Where did you get it?"

"Remember the day we went for a walk in San Francisco; the day you caught me admiring the china?" He cocked his head and smiled. "You weren't the only one paying attention that day. And I hope you don't mind, but I promised we could display your spyglass as well, and it fits perfectly with your clipper ship."

Standing on the hearth, he studied the workmanship of the model; the masts, sails, lines, halyards…everything from stem to stern. Then he noticed the shell sitting on the side opposite his spyglass. "You didn't find that on the beach."

Smiling, she said, "No, I bought that in Santa Cruz. Isn't it magnificent? I had never seen a real Triton's Trumpet."

He stepped down from the hearth, taking her hands and moving them over his shoulders, and then held her at her waist. "And what is this for?"

Playing with the hair that curled behind his ears, she answered, "Well, I know you don't celebrate your birthday. I don't celebrate mine either. What we do is buy each other presents anyway and ask Ming Ling to prepare our favorite meals." She cut her eyes up to his and smiled.

Adam grinned. "How did you get it up there with one hand?"

Arching an eyebrow, she smiled smugly. "Micah helped me."

Drawing her closer, he bent and kissed her, then looked back into her eyes. He hadn't seen them smile the way they were smiling now in weeks. He wrapped his arms around her, kissing her long and thoroughly until they heard someone clearing their throat. They both looked. Shiloh pulled her arms from around Adam's neck and blushed while Adam winked at Micah, then took Shiloh's face in his hands and kissed her one more time. "Thank you."

Dinner that evening was tender, thick steak cooked medium rare with potatoes and corn, and for dessert, chocolate cake.

Later that evening, Shiloh excused herself to the bedroom while Micah and Adam were discussing their day and what they planned for the next day. When Adam came into the room, Shiloh was at her dressing table, brushing her hair. Sitting on the side of the bed, he began to undress while he watched her. She had been distant since Will's attack four weeks ago. She would jump whenever he came up behind her to put his arms around her. He understood her reaction, but even when she saw him coming, she became so tense he knew she must be in physical pain from the tightness of her muscles. So he made no advances. Tonight, she had allowed him to hold her, and he felt her relax in his arms. He stood and laid his shirt and trousers over the other chair in the room, and when she stood and laid her robe over her chair, he stepped behind her. She could see his reflection in the mirror, so when he touched her arms, she didn't flinch, but she did stiffen.

"Take the gown off," he said softly. "You've always slept without it."

"I still have bruises. I'm not very nice to look at right now," she said, turning to him.

Taking her face in his hands, he turned her head up to his. "You'll always be beautiful to me." She hesitated, but lifted the gown over her head and laid it with her robe on the chair. When he moved to pull her into him, she raised her hands to his chest and stopped him. "I miss you," he whispered.

Backing away, she whispered. "I'm sorry. When I close my eyes, I see him…and that rock."

He caught her arms and pulled her back into him, bending and laying his forehead on hers, moving his hands over her shoulders to her neck. "Then don't close your eyes." When he kissed her, her eyes were open even though his were closed. He lifted her and laid her on the bed, leaving the lamp turned up. Looking into her eyes, he whispered, "There's no one here but me." He kissed her tenderly and buried his face in her neck when he felt her hands on his back.

Holding him tightly, she realized that she missed him, too.


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter Thirty-One**

Ben stood back and watched as Adam wielded a cant hook, rolling logs toward the teamster's wagons at the same time he shouted orders at the men stripping bark from the poles to be loaded.

"Adam!" Ben yelled.

Looking up, Adam nodded to his father, then passed the cant hook to another man and gave him instructions to keep the logs moving. He walked over and shook his father's hand. "Pa."

"You've still got two of these wagons to load. Do I need to remind you you're leaving in the morning?"

"We'll make it, Pa. This batch didn't get debarked. That's why it's taking so long. Hoss is at the other camp, making sure the lumber for the railroad ties is loaded, and Shorty's running the mill."

"What's left?"

"I'll have these men get everything cleared for replanting, and then send them to you to help cut for the square sets. The teamsters will camp here for the night. We'll be heading out the south end of the Ponderosa and skirting the lake, so there's no point sending them back to Virginia City."

Ben nodded. "How's Shiloh?"

Looking down, Adam scratched his nose, and then looked back out at the wagons. "A little better, I think. But she's still not herself."

"Give her time," said Ben, smiling and wrapping an arm around Adam's shoulder." It's only been four weeks since she was attacked. Women need time to get over that sort of thing."

Adam snorted. "Maybe."

xxxxxxxx

That evening, Shiloh laid her and Adam's cloths out to pack. Adam looked over her shoulder, checking the clothes she was packing for him. "I'll need a suit, and you'll need a dress for dinner at the Slater's."

She frowned. "I thought I'd stay at Jim's while you're in the city."

"Why?" he asked, stepping against her back.

"Because I still have bruises, and my hand is still bandaged. I don't want to have to answer questions."

He smiled. "The Slater's would never be that inconsiderate."

"It's not the Slater's I'm worried about."

"Who then?"

Sighing heavily, she walked to the closet. "Everyone else. We can't step one foot in San Francisco without the entire city knowing."

Taking her hand, he turned her around to face him. "Maybe this trip is exactly what you need." When she looked away and sighed, he turned her face up to his, and even then, she didn't look him in the eye.

"Maybe I should just stop singing and training horses. It seems I'm asking for trouble by doing them."

Adam's jaw dropped. He took her hand and led her to the bed, sitting down with her. "Shiloh, you can't draw a line from Will Stewart to your singing. Your singing had nothing to do with what he did. And there's only been one problem with the horses, and that has to do with a particular animal. It has nothing to do with the business. Why would you want to give those up?"

"Maybe I'm kidding myself into thinking I'm really capable. I could learn to cook. I could stay here and take care of the house…like normal women do."

"While that might last a short while…until you get past this, it won't be satisfying to you the way your singing and your horses are. Sweetheart, you're the most capable person I know." He brushed her cheek with the back of a finger. "When all the reminders are gone, you'll feel differently." Taking her hands, he brought them up to his lips and kissed them. "I don't want you to make any decisions one way or another until you've given yourself time to heal, and I'm not just talking about the bruises or your hand."

"Hey, you two. Dinner's ready," said Micah, knocking on the door.

"We'll be right down," answered Adam.

Standing, he brought her to her feet and kissed her softly. "You can start by smiling," he said, kissing her nose.

She glanced up at him, and gave him a weak smile that faded as her eyes moved away. "How long will we have to stay in the city?"

"A few days," he said, moving his arm around her and walking her out the door and down the stairs. "It will take a whole day, maybe two, to inspect the courthouse foundation. The mayor may want to introduce us to the city's new attorney." In the dining room, Adam pulled Shiloh's chair out and seated her, nodding to Micah. "And if any of the mining suppliers have equipment in a local warehouse, we might be buying some and arranging shipment. That will depend on whether Jim has been able to set up the subsidiary. Micah, you and I need to discuss the mine and ranch."

"What's there to discuss?"

"Ownership. Shiloh said this place was meant to be yours. We need to get your name on the deeds."

Choking on his coffee, Micah held up his hand as he coughed. "Just wait a minute. I'm not going to walk back in and just take over what you two have built back up. I know Dad let it go when he got sick, and I know, Shiloh, how much work you put into it to get it going again. Adam, you've done about as much since you've been here. No, this place is still yours."

"Alright then, equal partners," said Adam with a raised eyebrow. "Shiloh and I have land on the Ponderosa."

Micah studied him while Shiloh sat quietly, hesitating with each bite she put in her mouth. Adam's mouth was drawn, and his eyes were fixed on Micah's in the way Micah remembered when Adam was dead serious and wasn't going to argue.

Adam looked over at Shiloh while he spoke to Micah. "We can sign all the legal paperwork there."

Both men watched Shiloh, and then looked back at each other. "Shiloh, is that alright with you?" asked Micah.

She stopped her fork midway between her plate and her mouth, and looked up at the men. "Whatever you think is best. Have I eaten enough, Adam? I'd like to finish packing, if that's alright."

His shoulders slumped as he exhaled. "Yeah," he said, nodding disappointedly. Shiloh excused herself and left the dining room.

Watching her go, Micah asked, "What are we going to do about her?"

"I don't know that there's anything we can do until she's ready to put this behind her."


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter Thirty-Two**

Normally, Adam didn't need an alarm clock to wake up in the morning, but getting up at four was a little different. When the alarm sounded, he rolled over on his stomach and reached for the clock on the night table, fumbling for the switch that stopped the bell. Then he reached for Shiloh.

He moved his hand up and down on her side of the bed, and then moved it up to her pillow. Raising his head, he looked for her, and not finding her in the bed, he rolled to his back and looked across the room. "Shiloh?" he mumbled groggily. He snorted, threw the covers off and got out of bed, yawning and scratching his chest as he walked toward the closet. Stopping in front of the dressing table mirror, he looked at himself, rubbing his chin and glancing up at his wild hair. He looked for his brush and razor, and when he couldn't find them, he assumed that Shiloh had packed them. Turning in a circle, he looked for their bags, and when he didn't see them, he shrugged and dressed, then slowly descended the stairs with his boots in his hand, walking past the dining room.

He stopped and backed up when it registered that Micah was sitting at the table. "How did you get down here so fast?"

Looking up from his coffee, Micah laughed. "Well, aren't we a lovely sight this morning?"

Adam glared at Micah for a moment before he made his way through the kitchen to the washroom. The corner of his mouth turned up when he found his brush and shaving things next to the wash basin with a note. _Don't forget to pack them. Your bag is by the front door. I love you. S _

When Adam came back into the dining room, he looked at Micah with raised eyebrows and waited for a response before he sat down. "It's an improvement," said Micah, nodding.

Adam smirked. "Where's Shiloh?"

"She's making sure the right horses are brought up, and she's pulling out the tack she needs to take. She said she'd be back in a minute. That was about twenty minutes ago."

"Did she eat anything?"

"Nope. Went straight out the door."

Adam pushed back from the table. "Excuse me."

About the time he was pulling on the front door, she was pushing. "Where are you going?" she asked.

Looking at her from under his brow, he said, "To find you."

She put her hat on the coat tree as she replied, "I'm not lost," then left him with the door knob in his hand and went to the dining room. By the time Adam closed the door and followed her in, she was seated and was filling her plate.

After he sat down, he moved his hand to his cheek to prop his head on and watched her. "Hungry?"

Without looking up, she said, "Yes," and pulled a hot biscuit apart and buttered it. She pointed her knife at him. "You should eat before it gets cold."

He chuckled and shook his head. "Yes, ma'am."

Shiloh took a bite of bacon. "Micah, are you all packed?"

"Yes'm. All I need are the reins of my assigned horses."

"Did you pack something suitable for dinner in San Francisco?"

Taking a deep breath, he said, "I'm just gonna stay with the horses."

"I don't get to stay with the horses. Why should you?"

"Someone has to take care of them."

"That's why Tom is going."

"Shiloh, what are you doing?" asked Adam.

Micah and Shiloh both looked up from their plates. "I'm eating."

"Why are you trying to get Micah into San Francisco?"

Sitting up straight, she looked Adam square in the eye. "Because you won't let me stay at Jim's, and you won't let me go anywhere by myself, and I don't want to be cooped up in our room while you look at a courthouse foundation for two days." She smiled cheekily and continued eating.

Adam narrowed his eyes and crooked his jaw. "I thought you didn't want to be seen."

Placing her fork very slowly and quietly on her plate, she reached into her lap and grasped her napkin, looking away. "You wanted me to be normal. I'm trying." She glanced up at him as she brought her napkin to her mouth. "Excuse me. I'll be outside waiting to go." She took the small bag that held his grooming things and left the dining room. Propping his elbow on the table, Adam pinched the bridge of his nose.

"I need to go to San Francisco with you anyway, but not to watch Shy," said Micah. "I need to watch you."

Adam raised his head. "What are you talking about?"

"Have you forgotten someone tried to kill you?"

"No, I haven't forgotten," said Adam, standing up. "Go ahead and finish. I want to talk to Shiloh before we leave." Dropping his napkin on the table, he went to the front, took his hat and gun belt off the entry table and walked outside. He stood on the front porch, watching Shiloh attempt to fasten a leather strap to both of their bags. She jumped when he came up behind her. "You're not supposed to be using that hand." Letting out a loud breath, she dropped the strap and walked to a bench against the barn, sitting down. Adam bent down, picking up the strap and the two bags and sat on the bench beside her. "Tell me what you were doing, and I'll do it for you."

"Buckle the ends of the strap around the handles of the bags, and then put them behind my saddle with my saddlebags. I figure it will be easier for me to carry them since I won't be leading any horses."

"Makes sense." When Adam had their bags and her saddlebags on Eli, he sat back down next to her. Leaning back against the barn and crossing his legs at the ankles, he pushed his hat back on his head. "Shiloh, I don't want you to be better until you're ready to be better."

She wrapped her arms around herself and looked away. "I feel useless."

He snorted and smiled, pulling her into his side with his arm around her. "Now that sounds normal. When one of us was hurt, Pa would never let us out of the house until he thought we were completely healed. By that time, we were all ready to shoot ourselves from being confined for so long." She laid her head on his shoulder. "You won't be cooped up in the room all day. I spoke to Tom Maguire. He said he would be more than happy for you to practice with his orchestra while I'm at the courthouse site."

A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "You did?" she asked, cutting her eyes up to his.

"Mm hm. Now, why are four of those horses saddled?"

"Because I needed to take the saddles so the men buying these horses have a chance to ride them. Jim still has one of my saddles, and I think with these four I have a saddle that will fit all the horses, except the Clydesdale. I'll ship what we can't bring back with us. Or I suppose I could sell them and buy some new ones when we get back."

Micah strolled out into the yard with a bag. "I'm ready," he said as tied his bag to his saddle.

When Adam and Shiloh stood, she wrapped her arms around him, gazing up at him with a timid smile. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," he said, hugging her tightly. He cupped her chin in his hand and kissed her, whispering, "My love." He closed one eye and winced when she turned away and yelled loudly for Tom.

"Yes, ma'am," Tom answered, running out of the barn.

"Did you have breakfast?"

"Yes, ma'am. Ming Lin brought some out earlier for me."

By this time Hank and Johnny were there as well, and when everyone was saddled, Johnny divided the reins among the three men while Adam spoke to Hank. "Pa will pick up payroll when he goes into town for the Ponderosa payroll. Hoss will be here to help with the foaling. There's a list on the desk of the places we plan to stop and where we'll be in San Francisco if you need to find us, and if you need help quicker, go to the Ponderosa." Adam turned his horse so that Hank was on the side away from Shiloh. "Put some men up on the ridge. I don't want them to do anything but stand at the top. Maybe that will stop any work up there until I can talk to George Hearst. If trouble starts, tell them to get out of there and ride into town to tell Sheriff Coffee."

Shiloh walked Eli around Adam. "Double the men up there. Use the men who are clearing the new pasture for me."

Narrowing his eyes, Adam asked, "Don't you need that pasture space?"

She raised her chin defiantly. "Yes, I do, but I can do without it for another month. I don't want to put my men…" she hesitated "…our men…in that kind of danger. The men who spoke to me in town were hired guns. Our men are ranch hands. They'll be no match. If George Hearst is the man we think he is, he'll make sure we get back anything that was stolen, and even if he doesn't, a little silver is not worth their lives."

He smiled inwardly. She was being over-cautious, but that never hurt. Maybe her over- cautiousness was a good balance for them.

She leaned toward him and spoke quietly, "Adam, Daddy always told me that the most important thing we have as ranch owners are the men who work for us. They are the ones that make it all possible. We should do everything in our ability to protect them."

"You're right," he said, grinning. He nodded to Hank, who also grinned and tipped his hat. Turning in his saddle, he looked behind him at Tom and Micah who were waiting with their horses. "Let's head out," he said, leading the way with Shiloh riding next to him.


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter Thirty-Three**

Adam led the others into the timber camp just as the teamsters were hitching their horses to their wagons. Before they were on their way, Hoss rode into the camp to make sure the teamster wagons carrying the railroad ties had joined them. He also had a delivery for Shiloh.

"I'll never get tired of seeing these horses of yours. I sure wish I could train one of 'em."

Looking down at Hoss from Eli's back, she said, "Your wish will come true as soon as Sampson is three. He's yours to train."

Hoss grinned from ear to ear. "Oh, before I forget…I wanted to get this to you before you left," he said, handing an envelope up to her.

She looked at it. "Help me down, please." Swinging her leg over her saddle horn, she sat sideways in the saddle and slid down into Hoss' waiting arms. She tied Eli, then took Hoss's hand and walked over to the stump end of a log and sat down, beckoning him to sit with her. "Tell me, Hoss, how is Annie?"

"She's a might upset about what happened to you. But she says she's doin' good in school."

"I thought she needed to hear that from me; not the newspaper. What about you and Annie?" Hoss blushed. "It's alright if you don't want to tell me."

Hoss hung his head. "The truth is, she's talkin' about takin' a break at the end of the year and comin' back for the winter, then goin' back to school in the spring."

"Won't that extend her time there?"

"Yeah, it will. I told her I'd come out, but I'm afraid Pa'll say 'no.' There's a lot to do to get ready for winter. If I go, I'd have to leave before the winter storms start, and I won't be comin' back 'til early spring."

"Our men can help with winter preparations. With Micah here, we won't be shorthanded if you go." Hoss raised his head and smiled. "Do you want me to talk to Pa?" she asked.

"No, I can talk to Pa, but it sure wouldn't hurt if you were there."

Adam looked over just as she kissed Hoss's cheek. "Don't say anything until we get back," she whispered. "Then we'll talk to Pa together."

"And just exactly what are you talking about with my best girl?" asked Adam, standing in front of them with his arms crossed.

Standing, Hoss held out his hand to Shiloh. "You ain't got nothin' to worry about. I got my own best girl."

Chuckling, Adam asked, "How is Annie?"

"She's fine. She wants to come back, but me and Shiloh think we can talk Pa into lettin' me go to Philadelphia for the winter."

Adam grunted. "Good luck with that. It's time for us to get going." He shook Hoss's hand. "If you need to, stay at the Flying W for the foaling. With the number of mares Shiloh has in foal, it could get busy."

"I may do just that."

"Johnny and Billy are yours while we're gone," said Shiloh. They know where everything is if you run into trouble with any of the mares."

Once Adam was mounted, he took Shiloh's arm and pulled her up while Hoss lifted her high enough to get her foot in the stirrup. She took the saddle horn with her right hand, then swung her leg back and over.

The trip south through the Ponderosa was slow and uneventful. The teamsters had to stop every hour or so to rest their horses. They stopped once they got down to the lake, then stopped again at Friday's Station on the lake side of Kingsbury grade, and again at Yank's Station just before the climb to the top of Johnson's Pass.

When they were nearing the summit, Micah rode ahead to have the oxen ready to pull the wagons up the grade. Once the ropes were tied to the first wagon and harness, they were wrapped around the base of trees at the top of the grade with the oxen tied to the other end, pulling down as the wagon was pulled up. With the heavy loads of lumber on the huge wagons, the oxen and teams were making slow progress. At this rate, with twelve wagons to pull up, it would be well past dark before the last wagon reached the summit.

Adam stood discussing the problem with the pull master and several of the team drivers. "Are there more oxen?" asked Adam.

"It won't matter," said the pull master. "I don't have enough of them to last through your last wagon. We can change 'em out, but after four or five of these wagons, they'll be useless until tomorrow."

Turning to one of the team drivers, Adam asked, "How do you get 'em up Kingsbury grade?"

"We keep extra teams at the bottom for the heavier loads."

"Can't we use one of the other wagon teams and double up to get them up the grade?"

"We could do that, but we still won't have 'em all up until after dark if we have to keep changing 'em out."

Shiloh had been waiting in the saddle while the men discussed the problem. "Adam." He continued talking to the teamsters. She called a little louder. "Adam." He glanced back at her with an annoyed look, scratched the back of his neck, then excused himself, walking back to her horse and glaring up at her. Speaking in a low voice so only he could hear, she said, "The Clydesdale can pull a ton on his own, and Eli and Apollo can handle half a ton each. If you add them to the oxen, they should make quick work of this."

Adam twisted his mouth. "I can understand your willingness to use the Clydesdale, but Eli and Apollo?"

Smiling, she answered, "Though they are beautiful animals, they _are_ draft horses. They're used for husbandry in the Netherlands. It's in their blood. I've always said they'll do anything you ask of them."

Adam and Shiloh rode the two black horses up the grade. He unsaddled them and took them and the Clydesdale back to the road, tied them on shorter ropes than the oxen so the horses would pull more of the load, and within three hours all the teamster's wagons were at the top of the grade.

The lead teamster, a man named Edvard who spoke in a thick Nordic accent, shook Adam's hand. "Mr. Cartwright, thank you for the use of your great-horses. I wonder if you could tell me where you got them. We don't often come up Johnson's Pass, but our teams do struggle up Kingsbury."

"My wife breeds them. If you're interested in purchasing some, you'll want to speak with her."

The man laughed, but stopped cold when Adam raised his chin and narrowed his eyes. "Your wife?"

Adam looked down, smiling. "Yes, my wife. The horses are hers." He walked away, leaving Edvard standing with a puzzled expression.

Going down the slope on the other side of the summit was slow. The teamsters had to make frequent use of their brakes to prevent the wagons from going too fast. A runaway logging wagon could easily run over a team of oxen when out of control. The convoy of wagons, oxen and horses stopped for the night after making it past the haul-over at Slippery Ford at dusk. The next morning they moved on through Strawberry to Silver Fork and Pacific House, pushing through until they were near the Sportsman's Hall stage station just east of Placerville where they made camp again.

Adam stood by Eli while Shiloh slid down out of her saddle into his hands. When she came down on her foot, she favored it. "Are you alright?"

Smiling tiredly, she said, "Yes, I'm fine. I'm just tired." She took a step and limped badly. "And stiff."

"Come over here and sit down, and I'll bring your saddle and bedroll," he said as he led her to a log where they would make camp. While the teamsters positioned their wagons into a circle that was big enough to corral the horses, Tom and Micah took care of Shiloh's horses. Adam prepared Shiloh's bedroll, and by the time he had his saddle down with his bedroll spread out, she was sound asleep.

The men built a fire and prepared their dinner of coffee and beans. Nodding toward Shiloh, Micah asked, "Is she alright?"

"Doc said she'd be tired. Maybe I should have sent her on the stage."

"And let me miss all the fun?" she said, turning over to face them and pulling her blanket up to her chin.

"Since you're awake, you should eat," said Adam, smiling and spooning some beans onto his plate for her. "And don't try to tell me you're not hungry. It won't make a difference." She sat up and quietly ate her beans.

When Adam stood to collect the plates and spoons, Tom stood with him. "I'll take care of those, Mr. Cartwright."

"Thank you, Tom." He watched Tom take a bucket toward the river, and then sat back down next to Shiloh. "When he's done, we'll turn in." Lifting Shiloh's blanket, he leaned into her and kissed her. "Why don't you go ahead and lie down, Sweetheart?" She did, and before Tom finished cleaning the dishes, she was asleep again.


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter Thirty-Four**

"I'm glad you didn't wear your britches today," said Adam as the convoy pulled into Sacramento.

Looking away, she said, "I didn't bring any britches…just my riding skirts."

"And why didn't you bring your britches?" he asked, smiling.

"They seem to upset you, so I've decided that the only time I'll be wearing them is when work on the ranch requires it. That way, I won't embarrass you."

He snorted as he looked at his hands on his saddle horn. "Shiloh, you don't embarrass me. I just didn't want some flippant remark by someone else to embarrass you."

Turning back to him, she asked, "Why are you glad I'm not wearing britches today?"

Because I'm sending you and Micah with the railroad ties over to the Pacific Railroad office to deal with Mr. Crocker while I go to the docks to handle the turnover of the dock lumber. He knows you, so you shouldn't have a problem. You can introduce him to Micah since he could be dealing with Crocker in the future.

The party split as they arrived in Sacramento. Adam led the four wagons of poles to the Sacramento River docks, Shiloh led the remaining eight wagons toward the Pacific Railroad office, and Micah and Tom followed her, taking with them the horses that Adam had been leading.

Stepping into the office, Shiloh advised the clerk her name, and he immediately went into a back office. In only a moment a grinning Charles Crocker emerged. "Mrs. Cartwright, I trust you had an easy journey."

Smiling, she took his hand. "Easy no, but uneventful. It was a bit of a challenge to get the wagons over Johnson's Pass. We have the first two contracts of timber outside, and I'm sure the teamsters we used would be more than happy to haul them where you need them."

"How are you, my dear?" he asked with a concerned look.

"I'm fine, Mr. Crocker," she said, casting her eyes downward. Taking a deep breath, she looked back up. "I assure you."

"And your hand?" he asked, examining her bandaged hand.

"The doctor said there was no major damage. I'll still be able to play piano after it's healed."

"Good," he finished, gently patting her hand. "And who is this young man with you?"

"I apologize. This is my brother, Micah Whitney. Micah, Charles Crocker."

Crocker looked confused. "Oh, I thought your brother had died, my dear."

Clearing her throat, she answered, "Yes, we all did, but that's a long story. Remind me to tell you the next time we have dinner."

Micah looked disbelievingly at her as he shook Crocker's hand, then offered a twin smile to Shiloh's.

"If you'll both come into my office, I'll give you the bank drafts for the first two contracts." Shiloh and Micah followed Crocker into his office where he seated them in front of his desk. He handed Shiloh the bank drafts. "If you'll just sign here that you received them." She signed the receipt. "Now, if you'll take a look at these modifications, we can get this all signed as well."

"Mr. Crocker, I would never think of putting at you risk on any of these contracts. We both know with my signature they aren't legally binding, though I appreciate your trust in me. I'll take this with us and give it to Adam. He's here delivering timber to the docks, but we'll be off to San Francisco as soon as we're finished here, and I'm sure he'll want some time to review them. Perhaps he can drop this off on our way back to the Flying W…in about a week."

"Can't Mr. Whitney sign them?"

"That would be a little premature," said Micah. "I'm not legally on the deeds or other papers for the Flying W yet. That will also be rectified this week in San Francisco."

"Well then, next week it is. To tell you the truth, the timber you've delivered today will keep us busy for a few months. Would you let Adam know that we expect the other two contracts to go through as well? We are in negotiations with Mr. Judah to buy out his interests in the railroad. Once that's done, we'll be quickly moving forward."

"I'll be sure to tell him." Shiloh stood and offered her hand to Mr. Crocker, who took it and bowed, then held his hand out to Micah.

"Mr. Whitney, it's been a pleasure meeting you."

"You as well, Mr. Crocker."

When they walked outside, Shiloh introduced Mr. Crocker to one of the teamsters. "Adam has already paid Edvard, the lead teamster, who is over at the docks. There are four extra wagons there if you need additional hauling."

At that moment, Adam rode around the corner down the street. Dismounting, he joined them in front of the wagons. "Mr. Crocker," said Adam, offering his hand. "These gentlemen will be looking for work and since the wagons are already loaded…."

"Mrs. Cartwright was just telling me you've released an additional four wagons. We can use the extra wagons to haul some equipment with the lumber for the ties. Of course, the ties will be milled here before we send them up the track."

"I'm glad you can use them. They did a good job for us. Well, we should be going. We've still got a long way."

Mr. Crocker had been scrutinizing Apollo and Eli. "Just quickly, where did you find your horses?"

Shiloh grinned. "I breed them."

"Oh yes, I remember Mr. Stanton telling me you continued your father's horse business."

She stepped away from the first wagon and pointed down the street. "Those are some of my horses bound for San Francisco. If you're interested, let me know. Perhaps you can come to the ranch and take a look at what I have."

"Well, if they're all as magnificent as these, I'll definitely make plans to do that." Crocker took her hand again. "Please have a safe journey. Oh, and don't forget to show that contract to Adam." Adam raised his eyebrows.

"I won't forget," she said, smiling. "Goodbye, Mr. Crocker. Please, give our regards to Mrs. Crocker."


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter Thirty-Five**

The four riders left Sacramento as people on the streets stopped to watch the line of exceptional horses travel through town. Adam led with Shiloh riding at his side followed by Tom, then Micah.

When they were well away from any other people, Micah yelled from the back, "Shiloh!" She turned in her saddle to look at him. "'Remind me to tell you the next time we have dinner?' You had dinner with Charles Crocker?"

She snorted at the same time she heard Adam chuckle and yelled back, "Weren't you watching?"

"No, I was watching someone else in San Francisco."

"I'll tell you when we stop to rest the horses." She turned forward and spoke to Adam in a lower voice. "Before I forget, I have two bank drafts for the first two contracts, and I have a revised contract you need to review. I told Mr. Crocker you would drop it off on the way back home."

"Just one contract?"

"Yes. Mr. Crocker said that he and others were in negotiations with Mr. Judah to buy out his interest in the railroad. He said once that was done things should move quickly."

"Where are the bank drafts?"

"The drafts are in my boot. The contract's in my saddle bag."

They stopped for the night between Vacaville and Vallejo, getting to the livestock ferry in Oakland before noon the next day. The ferry caused little problems for the horses. Most didn't seem to mind the watery crossing. Only three had to be held and calmed.

The people of San Francisco had the same reaction to the horses as those of Sacramento, stopping to watch the elegant animals pass by. Adam stopped only long enough to deposit the two bank drafts Shiloh was carrying and the one he was carrying from the dock timber. They stopped again south of San Francisco to rest the horses and eat, and then continued on another six hours to Fischer's ranch where they arrived just as the last light faded.

Jim came out of the house as Adam was helping Shiloh out of her saddle. "Adam, I was beginning to worry."

"Jim, how are you? We made good time from Sacramento, but it took longer than normal getting to Sacramento with the lumber wagons."

Jim nodded and turned his attention to Shiloh who was still standing under Adam's arm, leaning into his side. "You look tired."

She nodded slightly. "The doctor warned me."

"Why don't we get you into the house? My men can help get the horses settled."

"Before we go in, Jim, I'd like you to meet Shiloh's brother, Micah Whitney," said Adam. "And this is Tom Baker, one of Shiloh's men."

"Jim, Tom will be staying with the horses," said Shiloh. "Do you have room for him in your bunkhouse?"

"I'll do better than that. There's a room in the barn that's unoccupied right now. He can stay there. Micah, when you and Tom have the horses settled come on inside."

Once in the house, Jim showed Shiloh to a chair in the sitting area directly between the open windows in the back and front of the house where a constant breeze passed through. "Adam, have seat," Jim said, motioning to the chair next to Shiloh. He turned to the liquor cabinet and poured three brandies, delivering two to his guests, and then sitting with them. "Shiloh, your hand is still bandaged. How bad is it?"

Taking a deep breath and glancing over at Adam, she put on a smile. "The doctor said that with exercise, it should be fine. The knife didn't cut any tendons; just muscle. He actually said that playing my piano would be the perfect exercise."

"You know, in lieu of charging Stewart with attempted murder you could get a monetary judgment against his estate. Not that I think you would, but as your lawyer, I would be remiss if I didn't, at least, inform you."

She smiled wearily. "Then consider me informed. Truthfully, Jim, the only thing I want is for this incident to go away. I don't even want to know what will happen to his estate since he had no wife and no children. I don't think he had any siblings, either."

"When the court adjudicates his estate, they may award you if there are no relatives. It's not uncommon for an injured party in a case like this to receive the estate."

Resting her forehead in her hand, she sighed. "Then I would like you to act on my behalf and do some good with any money that might come my way. Give it to…an orphanage. I don't want anything from that man." She glanced at Adam again, and then looked quickly away. She had looked at him long enough for him to see that her eyes were becoming watery. He looked at Jim and shook his head.

"I'm sorry for upsetting you. I'll draw up the legal papers I'll need to handle it if it happens, and you can sign them before you leave. Other than that, I won't bring it up again. Now, how would you like to handle the horse sales?"

"I brought bills of sale with me if you wouldn't mind handling those. I will need to spend about an hour, maybe two with each buyer. We brought a few extra horses, so if they want more than one or would like another choice, they have one." She had slumped down into the chair, and pushed herself back up. "There's another gentlemen, Terrance Prescott, who wanted to know if I have horses suitable to pull a carriage. Do you know him?"

Jim winced. "I've met him on more than one occasion. He's a pompous ass." When Shiloh giggled, Jim gave her a quick look. "Pardon me."

"Well, that explains it," said Adam. Jim looked back questioningly. "Let's see, how did he put that? He wanted 'imposing and striking animals to pull his carriage,'" Adam said animatedly.

Laughing, Shiloh said, "I'll have to meet him in San Francisco. He has a home and stables there. I'll be showing him Eli and Apollo, and we've brought an even bigger horse with us."

"I saw," Jim said appreciatively. "It was hard to miss him. But I don't remember seeing anything like him when I was at the Flying W."

"It was never my intention to show those horses. Daddy used them for work, so with the number of timber contracts we have this year, we put them to work pulling logs."

Smiling, Adam reached for her hand. "And now, the teamsters who brought our lumber to Sacramento are interested in them. Besides that, we thought we could rent them and give the only man who has draft horses in our area some competition."

Sitting forward in his chair, Jim asked, "When would you like to start with the horses?"

"I think it would be better if we took care of our business in San Francisco first, and then you can take as long as you need with the horses," said Adam, turning to Shiloh. He looked back at Jim. "Were you able to get the subsidiary set up?"

"The paperwork is ready for you to sign."

"There's a change I'll need. Micah Whitney and I will be partners with the ranch and the mine."

"Ah yes, Micah. I thought…."

Adam looked over at Shiloh who was frowning. "That's a long story. I'll fill you in later."

You're sure you want to do this? You're giving away half of everything."

"No, I'm not," said Adam, smiling. "I'm giving it back. At least what he'll take."

"Jim, it was my father's intention to leave the ranch to Micah. He only left it to me because we all thought Micah was dead."

"My father gave me land on the Ponderosa a while back. Shiloh and I will be living there eventually."

"Alright, I won't argue. I know what you sound like when your mind is made up. As soon as Micah comes in, we'll have some dinner," Jim said, rising from his seat to take Shiloh's glass. "And then, you can get some rest."

"Thank you, Jim. I am tired. I think I'll sleep well tonight."

"That's good, Sweetheart," said Adam, "because we need to go back to San Francisco tomorrow morning."


	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter Thirty-Six**

After dinner, Adam carried their bags to their bedroom while Jim and Micah spoke about the legal papers in the main room.

Sitting on the side of the bed, Shiloh untied her scarf, and then pulled her boots off. Sucking in air as she pulled the right one off, she rubbed her ankle before she removed her sock. Adam heard the sound she made and was in front of her on his knees in an instant.

Taking her foot in his hands, he said, "Let me see," then pulled her sock off. "Your ankle is hot. The only reason it's not swollen is because your boot constricted it."

"It doesn't hurt that badly, but I wonder if I'll be able to get my foot in my shoe tomorrow."

"We'll have to wait and see. I might have to leave you here while I go deal with the courthouse. I think Evelyn will be disappointed, though. She likes you."

Taking a deep breath and smiling, Shiloh stood on her left foot and began to unbutton her skirt. "I'll make it…somehow. Where are we staying?"

"We'll be at the Lick House again."

"That's an awfully fancy hotel, Adam. Why there?"

"Because they don't let just anyone up on their third floor, remember? I don't want you overrun by curious people." Adam steadied her while she took off her skirt, then took it and her blouse and hung them in the wardrobe. He untied her corset and waited for the rest of her under things which he draped over a chair.

"Would you bring my brush?" she said, pointing to a small bag on the dressing table. "If I'm at Maguire's it shouldn't be a problem."

"We have to get you to Maguire's, so people will know you're there. I thought you could go with Micah and me if we find some mining equipment for sale." Surrounding her with his arms, he pulled her against him. "All that depends on what your ankle looks like in the morning," he said, gazing lovingly at her while she brushed her hair.

Smiling up at him, she said, "It really doesn't hurt that badly."

He bent and kissed her nose, then her mouth as she moved her hands up his chest and over his shoulders. He moved away slightly and said, "We'll see," then kissed her again as he lifted her against him and moved her backward toward the bed. She was smiling up at him as he took her brush and tucked her in. "Go to sleep. I want you well rested in the morning."

He bent to kiss her one more time and as he was rising, she grabbed his ears and met his eyes with hers. "Adam?"

"Hm?"

"I love you."

Sitting back down, he tenderly kissed her again. "I love you, too. Good night."

Closing the door quietly behind him, he went back to the sitting room and joined Micah and Jim. Jim had already poured Adam a glass of whiskey and handed it to him as he sat down. "Micah was just telling me about his and Shiloh's meeting with Crocker yesterday."

"Yeah, Adam. Where'd she learn to talk business like that? She didn't learn that from Dad."

Adam snorted. "I'm sure she learned some of it from Amos, but she did go to college."

"They don't teach that in college. She was comfortable. She had Crocker eating out of her hand."

Chuckling, Adam said, "Well, she had already impressed Crocker before that. She gets her confidence from performing, and I'm sure a good bit of it just comes naturally. Did you know she took law courses while she was in New York just so she could understand contracts?"

Micah looked at his whiskey and shook his head. "I've been watching her for years yet I don't know her anymore."

"That's not really true," said Adam. "She's the same girl. She's always been intelligent from when she was very young. She's always been stubborn, and she's always had a temper. She inherited her musical talent from your mother. She just needed the right direction. And there's one more thing you probably don't know."

"What else?" asked Micah, still staring at his glass.

"She remembers everything she reads." Micah was expressionless. "I'm serious."

"It's true, Micah," said Jim. "When she was here in March, we were going over her performance contracts. I had several examples, and she read all of them and quoted me verbatim what parts of each she wanted to use in her contracts. She'd just close her eyes and spout."

Setting his glass on a table, Micah clasped his hands, covering his mouth and mumbling. "My kid sister. Who'd a thought?"

Adam watched Micah for a moment before he changed the subject. "Jim, how long will it take you to change the paperwork for the ranch and the subsidiary for the mine. I'd like to sign those before we leave so we can file them here and then again in Virginia City."

"It should only take a few days. I can have them finished before you get back from San Francisco."

"Good. I'll probably spend two days at the courthouse site. I don't know yet if the mayor will request a meeting, and Micah and I are going to purchase some mining equipment if there's any to be had in the city. I also need to talk to George Hearst."

"Hearst? What about, if you don't mind me asking?"

"Apparently, his company owns the property just north of the ridge where we found a rich vein of silver and some gold. Do you remember someone trying to sell the Flying W out from under Shiloh and that business with Sam King?" Jim nodded. "We found where Sam got the ore he had assayed. There's a shallow shaft at the base of the ridge. On the other side, there's another shallow shaft. I had rocks from both sides assayed. There's nothing on the other side. It's all on the Flying W side, and that means that someone took ore from the Flying W side, had it assayed and claimed it was from the other side of the ridge. Hearst bought that property based on that assay. I think whoever turned in the assay was planning to tunnel through to our side of the ridge. Hearst needs to know what he bought into."

"What do you think he'll do?" asked Jim.

"I'm hoping he'll tell me the name of the broker that sold him that property. Then maybe we can trace it back to whoever was responsible for trying to sell the Flying W."

"If you can get the name, I can help with some research. Sometimes these investment firms hide assets behind layers of companies. It takes some persistence to weed through them all, but it can be done."

"If I find out anything from Hearst, I'll let you know. Now, if you gentlemen will excuse me, we have a long ride tomorrow and a busy afternoon after that." Micah stood with him. "Shiloh's ankle was bothering her tonight. I may have her stay behind while Micah and I go into San Francisco."

Smiling, Jim stood and said, "She's always welcome to stay here. If she does, I'll make sure she's well cared for."

"I know you will," said Adam, nodding.

"Before I turn in, I'm going to check on the horses," said Micah. "Don't wait up. I'll find my way."

Adam turned toward the bedroom. "Good night, gentlemen."


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter Thirty-Seven **

Sometime in the middle of the night, Adam was awakened by Shiloh's movements around and over him. Still groggy and with his eyes still closed, he could feel the warmth of her skin pressing against his and the softness of her lips moving over his face to his eyes, his cheeks and his mouth, and when he finally opened his eyes, she was there just above him, her lips parted and full, her eyes hungry.

xxxxxxxx

The dim light of morning had just begun to creep across the room when Adam woke up. He didn't move at first. Shiloh's head lay on his chest just under his chin. Both had fallen asleep that way. Her hair covered his right arm and her right hand was still clasped with his left. He smiled, then laughed to himself. Shades of the woman she had become during their last trip to San Francisco were beginning to emerge since the attack. The rumble of laughter in his chest made her stir. Holding her tightly to him, he rolled her to her back and buried his face in her hair as he yawned.

She smiled, running her fingers into the curls on the back of his head and whispering, "I'm sorry I disturbed your sleep."

"If that's what you call disturbing, you can _disturb_ me anytime," he answered as he kissed her neck and jaw. He raised his head to look at her, and she turned her face away. "What's wrong?" he asked softly.

Her smile was gone. "I look better in the dark."

Turning her face back to him, he looked lovingly at her. "They're almost gone." Then he kissed the faint bruises around her eyes, her mouth and her jaw.

"I need to take a bath this morning before we go," she said as she enjoyed his attentions.

"Good thing I asked Jim last night if he could arrange to have a bath prepared for you this morning." He took his time with his next kiss, making her toes curl. "First, let's have a look at that ankle."

When he started to rise, she pulled him back down for another kiss. "You haven't had a bath either. Would you care to share?"

He cocked his head with a pleased look. "Yes. Now, let me see your ankle." As he sat up on the side of the bed, she moved her legs to his lap.

A shudder ran through her as he ran his hand down her thigh and over her knee. "That's not my ankle."

"Didn't anyone ever tell you that patience is a virtue? I'm getting there." She felt his fingers wrap around her ankle. "It's not hot."

"I don't know if you noticed, but I'm not a horse."

"It would still be warm. It doesn't look swollen, but it looks like you have half an egg on the side of it, and it's still a little green." He gently squeezed. "How does it feel?"

"It's a little sore, but it's not bad."

"Alright then. Let's go get clean and fed, and then leave. Jim's loaning us a buggy, so we can tie Eli and Apollo to the back, and Micah can lead Clyde."

She cackled, "Clyde?"

He shrugged and opened the door between the room and the washroom, bowing. "After you, my love."

She took a tentative step, testing her ankle, and then gingerly stepped past him.

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When they arrived in San Francisco, Adam drove straight to the Lick House. "We'll get settled in our room, and then figure out our schedules." He dug his watch out of his pocket. "It's already three. There's no point in going to the courthouse site today. I wouldn't be able to do much, but the Slaters will want to know we're here."

The doorman walked out to the buggy. "Your name, Sir?"

"Cartwright. I'd like to store the buggy and these horses in your stables. This is Mr. Whitney. He'll be accompanying your stable hand with our horses." Turning to Micah, Adam said, "Tell them to bill the room for everything and make sure these three get oat hay. They should store the saddles, too." Micah nodded and followed the stable hand.

The doorman followed the Cartwrights into the hotel, placing their bags and Micah's next to the front desk, and introducing them to the desk clerk.

"Ah, Mr. Cartwright, it's nice to have you back. I have a two bedroom suite for you on the third floor as you requested."

"There's another gentleman with us; Micah Whitney. He'll need a key to the room as well. And I'd like to have a note delivered and a telegram sent."

"Adam, I need to have a note delivered, too."

The desk clerk produced pencils and paper, and the two began to write. "To whom are you sending a note?" asked Adam.

"Terrance Prescott…to let him know I'm here and schedule an appointment."

"I don't want you to see him by yourself."

She stopped writing and turned to face him, batting her eyelashes. "Why?" she asked impertinently.

"Because he's liable to be disrespectful and may try to take advantage of your current condition."

She cast her eyes down, and after a moment turned forward and finished her note, sliding it over to him. "Excuse me."

Adam stopped writing, and though he didn't look at her, he felt her move away. If she had been herself, she would have objected in a voice that was entirely too sweet. Instead, she dropped the subject like a hot coal and separated herself from him. He looked back for her. She had taken a seat in the lobby and waited on the edge of it with her hands clasped in front of her, looking down at the floor. She was definitely not doing as well as he had begun to believe. He called to her when it was time to go to their suite, and she obediently fell in line with him.

The ride in the lift was quiet, and other than the normal affair of dealing with the bellman, it remained quiet between them until the door was closed, and they were alone. They stood only about ten feet apart, but for Adam, it seemed as if they were miles apart.

Opening her mouth to speak, she froze and seemed to think about what to say, then just pointed to the bedroom to which she went immediately and closed the door behind her.

Adam stood looking at the place she had been standing with his mouth slightly open. He bent his head and scratched behind his ear, then followed her and quietly opened the door, finding her seated at the dressing table with her hands together as if in prayer, her thumbs under her chin and the sides of her index fingers pressed against her lips. Even though she was facing the mirror, she wasn't really looking in the mirror. Her eyes were sad; a sadness that ran deep and tore at his heartstrings.

When she realized he was in the room, she sat up straight and took a deep breath, then stood and began unpacking their bags.

"Shiloh?"

She swallowed hard and fought to keep her voice steady as she spoke. "Yes, Adam?"

"Talk to me."

She pulled a dress out of her bag, put a smile on her face and turned. "What would you like to talk about?" she asked, glancing at him as she walked past him toward the wardrobe.

By the time he got to her, the dress was on a hanger. He took it from her and hung it in the wardrobe, then took her hands, moving to the bed and sitting. "Whatever is bothering you, you don't have to hide it from me."

Looking down at their hands, she spoke so quietly he could barely hear her. "I'm trying."

"I know you're trying, but you shouldn't be trying for me. You should be doing that for yourself. Now, I know you would normally have objected to my remark about someone going with you to see Prescott, but Sweetheart, I don't think you're ready to deal with a man like that. You know that what happened to you at the hands of Stewart has been a subject for the newspapers for awhile, and a man like Prescott would not have second thoughts about taking advantage of you because of it."

"I know you're right. That's why I didn't argue. Mostly, I'm angry at myself."

He raised her face with a finger under her chin. "Why?"

"I should be able to handle a man like Prescott one way or another; either charm him or tell him what he can do with his carriage. But part of me is…" she teared up, "…afraid." When her nose wrinkled, he knew tears would follow. He pulled her into him, laying her head on his chest and stroking her hair. "I don't want to feel like this," she sniffed, "but I can't seem to stop."

"You're trying to do too much too soon. You don't have to do anything, Sweetheart. We can tell Prescott you're not up to it, and if we need to, we can cancel your performances for awhile."

Her head shot up off his chest, and she looked frantically at him. "No, we need the money to buy the mining equipment."

"No, we do not," he said emphatically, moving his hands to the sides of her head and holding her eyes with his.

"You said it would be better if we didn't have to take out any loans."

"It's always better if we don't take out any loans, so we don't have to pay interest, but I'm not worried about paying the loans. The mine will do that easily."

She wilted. "Adam, I can't cancel. We've already signed contracts and taken half the payment. And if I cancel now, they may not want me back. Besides, the first performance is almost two months away." Taking his hands again, she looked back at his eyes. "I want you to let me handle Prescott…alone."

Breathing deeply, he furrowed his brow. The corners of her mouth turned up somewhat when he pushed his lips out slightly; not a pout, but enough to define the elegant curve of his upper lip against his full lower lip. "No."

The word pulled her back from her thoughts. "No? But…"

There was a knock at the door. Adam stood to get it while he spoke. "You're not ready. And I'm not ready to leave you to someone like Prescott."

Following, she objected, "If I don't try sometime, I'll never be able to."

"Thank you, he said, taking a note from the attendant and closing the door. "You will. But you need to give yourself some time." He opened the envelope, then walked to her and kissed her forehead. "This will take your mind off of it. We're having dinner at the Slater's tonight."


End file.
